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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Anyone else feeling meh?

30 replies

Uninspiredusername · 06/08/2020 14:44

On paper all is good - healthy young child, nice house (though mortgage is high, yikes), lovely husband, haven’t been furloughed (though work pressure is intense).
I just feel... fed up. Quite teary, and small things can set me off. I’m frustrated with myself because things could be SO much worse.
How can I get out of his headspace? 😖

OP posts:
Lottapianos · 06/08/2020 14:47

Yes. Had a very serious case of 'meh' a few weeks ago, then it lifted, now its back in a milder form. I think you just have to go with it. Everything is still weird, theres still the threat of lockdown in local areas, no one really knows what's coming next. Eat well, sleep, exercise, keep a healthy routine as much as possible. It will shift, it always does

MumW · 06/08/2020 14:59

Yes, definitely feeling meh.

I think that some of it is the uncertainty of the situation and the realisation that it won't 'be over by Christmas'

Also, for me, it's come at a time of great personal change, youngest should be off to uni (A'Levels, now there's another great unknown and source of anxiety).
At a time when I was hoping to have a bit of personal space/freedom, I have DH WFH, watching my every move.

I guess my meh is a lot "shit, is this how the rest of my life is going to be"
I feel at a crossroad where all exits are blocked, if that sense. Actually, more like a roundabout, same old, same old, round and round with no escape.

But, hey, first world problems, at least we're all healthy. 🤞

Metalhead · 06/08/2020 15:05

If you find an answer, let me know - I’ve been feeling blue all week, despite the nice sunny weather.

sitckmansladylove · 06/08/2020 15:07

Yep crying a lot and very unhappy. But hopeful things will improve

AntiAuntieAnty · 06/08/2020 15:07

I have also had a serious dose of the mehs recently. Feel as if I'm coming out of it now. Exercise, although far from my favourite thing, and no booze seems to be helping. Maybe that's useful for someone.

Charles11 · 06/08/2020 15:08

I have ups and downs. You just need to do what you have to do keep yourself up.
Mine is getting out for bit and putting my phone down.
I always feel low if I waste too much time on my phone.

Feellikedancingyeah · 06/08/2020 15:09

Yes seems so long until back to school. I took my son to the climbing centre today. First visit for nearly 5 months. He used to climb every week and was missing it desperately. When we arrived the place looked fantastic but he couldn't get much enthusiasm without the other kids being there. And now he's sat in the kitchen on his phone again 😐

relievedlady · 06/08/2020 15:19

Can I join the meh group pls

Been back at work a month now.
Was manic but slowed up a lot
I'm finding it hard juggling full time with dh working nearly 70 hours some weeks and two dc at home bored and fed up Hmm

Elderly in laws help with the dc as in there to watch them as they're older dc but not old enough to leave all day.

Elderly in laws create more mess and frustration than anyone else so am gritting my teeth a lot right now.

Plus I miss my dc greatly.
There must be a better work life balance than the one we have and having a few months to actually think about it has made me want to address it but I can't until things settle down after Xmas Hmm

So I feel stuck

I'm not eating well and excercise has gone out the window.
I realise how well I actually felt in lockdown compared to now I'm bak to the daily grind and I hate it.

I have really enjoyed spending quality time with the dc and they are both in important years at school so we've done a lot of at home education.
Now I feel like I've abandoned them Confused

Lottapianos · 06/08/2020 15:25

'Yep crying a lot and very unhappy'

Let it out. I know it feels horrible Sad the feelings are there for a reason and you've got to feel them. The worst thing is to bottle things up or shame yourself because you 'shouldn't' be feeling this way

Jayaywhynot · 06/08/2020 15:38

Yep, I hear ya.
I had a long haul holiday this year, got back just before lockdown, got told last year that we were all being made redundant in June, 2 weeks after my finish date I found a new & better job, start new job monday & will be working from home, had 5 weeks off, got a very large redundancy package that I dont need to live off so it's all good right?
Wrong, I cant seen to stop crying, I'm so fed up, what about I couldn't really say, I feel like iv had enough.
According to my DM & DS all I need are antidepressants then the world will be good again, christ Confused

Lottapianos · 06/08/2020 15:50

'According to my DM & DS all I need are antidepressants then the world will be good again, christ confused'

Oh god. Yeah, medicate those feelings away! Hmm ADs definitely have their place but feeling upset and emotional in response to upsetting life events is really not it

relievedlady · 06/08/2020 16:05

I can feel my anxiety symptoms coming bak with a vengeance this last week Confused

It just reminds me how well I felt without the burden and weight of carrying everything as well as a career

The career I've crafted so hard for to get to this stage where actually I couldn't give a flying shit about it Hmm

It's not something I can do remote or home based so basically I either change my job path completely to get a better balance or lower my hours and salary at a time when the world is in dire straits and jobs aren't going to be easy to come by Confused

SecretWitch · 06/08/2020 16:08

I feel you. I feel like I’m moving through molasses. I do what needs to be done and no more. I must keep pushing myself to exercise as I know it makes me feel better

AmbitiousHalibut · 06/08/2020 16:14

Yep. Trying to move house, keep getting our dates pushed back and am gradually accepting we won't be able to move before term starts which is so disappointing because eldest DS is about to start secondary school and we were hoping to minimise disruption. Also trying to help my Mum downsize and move closer to me, so I can help to look after her. DH is around but flat out WFH and unable to help much. I have various other voluntary commitments that I feel obliged to keep but I'm drowning. Just drowning.

Ilikewinter · 06/08/2020 16:20

Yep, i feel like ive been hit by a train this week, have worked throughout but in retail and its very quiet right now so the days are sooooo long. Going through redundancy, but will be kept on so its good news but there will be so few of us left that i dread what ' the new normal' will look like. Spoke to my parents last night, who i cant now see again because i live in the North West..... I think thats what hit me the hardest. Its all just shit today 😥

LuaDipa · 06/08/2020 16:23

I’m with you. I usually love my job but having worked non stop through lockdown with no opportunity for time with the kids and no holidays to look forward to I’m feeling fed up and resentful. I’m genuinely grateful to still have a job, but some days feel as though I’d be happy to never think about it again.

Dh, the kids and I have never spent as much time all in the same place but I feel as though with dh and I wfh and no boundaries skewed, we spend no time together as a family. I’m very much a make the best of it person so I’m finding feeling this low for no reason a real challenge.

WarmSausageTea · 06/08/2020 16:28

I was feeling meh earlier in the week, now I’m feeling pff. (Except when DP is going on about something absolutely inconsequential. Then I go from lethargic to murderous.)

I’m not sure what the answer is. For me, more alone time would be good, but current circumstances make that difficult at best.

Lottapianos · 06/08/2020 16:34

You know what else is not helping? This awful heat. It's starting to build already in South East and we're in for about 5 days of it. Everything is about 100 times harder in this weather

Chwaraeteg · 06/08/2020 16:39

Yep. I had to phone in sick today because I literally couldn't stop crying. For no damn reason.I gave myself a cracking headache and now I feel like I could sleep for a month. I usually cry about twice a year so it's not like I'm a regular drama llama or anything.

It's just that the current unsustainable situation with WFH while caring for small children with no break, none of the usual outside support, not enough support from my partner (who has the 'big job') and employers basically expecting the same level of output as in normal times has made me finally crack. Roll on September.

bakereld · 06/08/2020 16:49

I feel you OP.

Realistically my life is great, but I can't help feel meh and very down some days since lockdown.

Furloughed since March, but DP is NHS DR who has been rushed off his feet. I feel like a huge waste of space in comparison, moping about the house, same routine everyday. Wake up, clean, cook,exercise,sleep. (No kids) It was great for the first month, but I feel like my life has 0 meaning and my workplace keep giving false hope of return.

Was supposed to get a huge payrise and promotion in April, but obviously didn't happen. I was working towards it for a whole year, which is pretty depressing, not that Covid can be helped.

Got an interview tomorrow which has lifted my spirits a bit.

Original poster
Uninspiredusername · 06/08/2020 16:56

Just logged back in and feeling really emotional at the responses - sorry to hear you’re all feeling similar, although of course, it’s reassuring too.
I don’t know how to tag but for those talking about lockdown etc, it’s so true - I think I have a “business as usual” mentality but of course it’s anything but. I wfh at the moment but feel quite isolated, even though I’m happy not to have a commute! We can’t afford a holiday for the foreseeable, which others seem to have the same situation, but without that “something to look forward to” everything feels a bit samey doesn’t it.

Will concentrate on eating well and getting fresh air, that tends to help. I suppose at the back of my head I worry about my mood when we descend into the winter months and worse weather.

OP posts:
Original poster
Uninspiredusername · 06/08/2020 16:57

Sorry to be all doom and gloom GrinBlush

OP posts:
WhereamI88 · 06/08/2020 16:58

Joining you.

Work is extremely busy and I HATE working from home. I want to see people, even my cunt of a boss.

I haven't seen my family since December (had planned to see them in March), my mum is vulnerable and in a different country so unlikely I will even get to see her this year.

Barely seen my friends as they live in various parts of London and travelling is a bitch now/no one wants to take the tube.

I don't get to go to concerts, theater, jet off on a weekend away i.e. do all the things I moved to London for!

So by the end of the year I will have spent the whole time sitting in an extremely small kitchen in an extremely small 1 bed flat in London doing nothing but work 12 hours a day 5 days a week and watch Netflix.

Fuck this shit. I'm both bored and anxious and I have a horrific economic crisis to look forward to.

relievedlady · 06/08/2020 17:17

There's quite a lot of people feeling very similar in my job Aswell I've noticed.

The having nothing to look forward to is an asshole and missing planned trips that we've all been looking forward to hasn't helped.

That and the figures going up and not down gives me worry that the dc will end up not going bak to school full time if at all to start with and I can't home school all morning and then work a long late shift every day again like it did to start with.

It didn't work full stop.
Everything and everyone was neglected it was awful Hmm

That's my latest worry this week Confused

AudacityOfHope · 06/08/2020 19:15

Yep.

Furloughed and now being made redundant from a job I loved for 15 years.

Two friends have died in the last month.

I'm really worried about the kids going back to school.

I have a terrible sense of foreboding about what's to come.

I just sent my 9 year old to bed because he was being cheeky; in reality he's probably feeling a lot like me but I just can't accept his shitty attitude any more.

So, yeah.

🤷🏻‍♀️