Looking back on the abusive relationship I was in with my son's dad with my counsellor this week has made me realise the extremes I went to at times to make myself safe.
I pretended I had chest pain once and went to a&e with a plan to get the doctor on his own and tell him I was being abused and needed help. I didn't manage to get away from my ex and he never left me alone so I didn't get a chance and was sent home, told I had anxiety. I still feel guilty now for wasting their time. I was desperate.
I used to come home later than needed from work so there would be no parking outside the house so I would have to walk an extra 10 mins, just so I could have a tiny bit more time feeling safe.
I used to stay at work until 8pm sometimes because I just didn't want to go home.
My whole life was like this. I'm feeling quite anxious just typing this out.
Did anyone else used to do things like this when in an abusive relationship?