To not know how to manage my feelings during fertility treatment?!

[BananaHammock23]

I feel like I'm going mad. I recently started my first cycle of stimulated IUI and over the past few weeks I feel like I've felt myself come undone.

Friends will talk to me about anything –work, holidays, other friends –and internally I am so angry. All I can think is that none of this matters when I'm going through treatment, and it's making me so ragey and stressed that I'm worried I'm hindering the process.

I can feel myself pushing everyone away. Luckily DP is very understanding, but I can feel that she's starting to find it frustrating that I've gone from being so calm and zen-like to this raging beast in a matter of weeks.

I know I'm not the only person to have fertility treatment, I know that my friends are entitled to their own lives, but I just feel so full of anger and I don't know how to control it. I know I'm on hormones (Buserelin and Menopur).

Did anyone else feel like this? Please tell me I'm not alone.

When taking the hormones before egg collection for ivf I felt much angrier than usual. My partner was not very understanding and we were on the verge of splitting up during it. We were living abroad and had not told anyone about the treatment. It is a very stressful time and others do not understand.

I did tell my sil before our second cycle and had to bite my tongue hard when she said oh how exciting. My sil is lovely but had no idea of infertility treatment. I found infertility forums useful as others are in the similar situations.

I found podcasts and walking helped to distract me slightly.

I also wanted to scream when people told me to relax. The day I had the the embryo transferred on my successful cycle we started a 3 day drive home to the UK across Europe. My husband was in the car with all our baggage and dog whilst I had the procedure. That was stressful and we now have an almost 3 year old. Hope you have a successful outcome.

Yep. The hormones do this. Just try and take time to yourself rather than having to be engaged in chats. Tell them you’ve got a headache and just want some quiet time or something.