WIBU to say I am not going

[ConcernedAuntie]

Very sadly I have heard this morning that my only cousin has died. We were close as children but not so much now although I was very fond of her.

Her son is going to let me know when the funeral is (she was a widow) but to be honest I am not sure I will go. The issue is that the journey there will take three and a half to four hours, barring holdups. The service itself is at a crematorium, there will be no hymns/singing and consequently a very short service. It will not be possible to hold a wake at the present time, so after a half hour or so we will be back on the road for the return trip. Once all this Covid madness is over her son wants to organise a family get together which would be lovely.

So WWYD? At any other time I would not hesitate to go, but I don't think I can face the thought of up to 8 hours of travelling for such a short period of time.

Sorry for your loss. Is the funeral being shown online? My uncle died in the middle of the pandemic and it was streamed and taped- to be viewed later on. I'm abroad and wouldnt have been allowed to travel at the time.

Are there any other relatives/friends in the area you could stay 1 night to break up the trip? In their caravan/motorhome/downstairs room/granny flat? Even if you wiped everything down and literally just slept the night there?

Can anyone else break up the drive with you- even if they did/didnt attend the actual funeral?

Please go. It isn't for her it's for her son.

8 hours to you will make a big difference for him.

You will never regret going and honestly her son may need you there. I know a few people who lost a family member during covid, part of what was extra hard about it was not having people around to support the living. This is your chance to show your respect to your cousin and support her son who now has no parents left.

You don't need to physically be at the crematorium to remember your cousin.
Do it in your own way.

Don't feel guilted into going.