To think some swearing in a pub is expected?

[PrincessHoneysuckle]

Just had a two day one night away at a coastal town in the North with dh and ds 6.We went to a couple of pubs in the evening en route to the restaurant we had booked.We sat outside as didnt feel comfortable being inside due to covid.A group near us were swearing a bit which wasn't ideal as we were with ds but it was a pub so just one of those things,adult environment etc.
Mentioned it to a friend and she was outraged that someone would swear near a child and couldn't believe i wasn't fazed.Is she being ott or am I in the wrong for not seeing it as a big deal?

I can't believe the righteous brigade tonight! An evening stroll, a couple of drinks in gardens then a meal while on holiday is fine.

Swearing is unpleasant and unnecessary in any environment, there are other words you can use to express something funny or something annoying/offensive.

Our local pub is not particularly child friendly but is a "no swearing zone", puts me on edge tbh! Some people are just really funny about swearing in front of kids, it doesn't bother me, they're just words, so long as they're not aimed at my kids, they're aware it's something adults do and they're not to be repeated. Never been one to shield them from it, but would pull them up on repeating, I don't like children/teenagers swearing.

@Capr1 in Britain?? have you been to other European cities? bad language is rife, far more than in a British pub!!

It might be just me but that’s certainly not the norm in my circles

In mine it's almost compulsory.

@ClickandForget 😂😂😂😂 just shows our paths might not be crossing in the foreseeable 😂😂😂

@PrincessHoneysuckle - now you would say that wouldn’t you? 😂😂😂

no alchohol probs here thanks

I think you have a problem with alcohol. It's spelt wrong.

Sorry. Couldn't resist.

@letmethinkaboutitfornow busted! I had ds lining up the shots for me really

I like pubs. I take my children to pubs. When I'm alone in pubs with friends I swear to my hearts content- and that's a lot of swearing to content my black heart.

When I take the dc to a pub I don't swear (nor do I tank 5+ pints as I would if they weren't there) but they know it's an adult environment so there will be other adults swearing, they are expected to behave appropriately, and as reward for accepting and knowing that, they get to drink coke and play cards in a pub, which they love.

Different pubs have different house rules, but not unexpected if there's a match on the telly, I'd say.

Senneti- no standards arelower in Britain (with obvious exceptions), I’m afraid. Culture of drinking until you’re off your face in a regular basis. Regular vomiting in public. No manners, class or standards in a lot of areas. Sad, but it’s what a lot of people seem to enjoy.

Maybe the occasion fuck or shit is ok.

But to be honest I can't stand it when peoples only adjective is fuck.

Pubs are now catering for a wider range of people.

I think Weatherspoon's have cracked some sort of nudge formula whereby all of the more rowdy people drift towards the bar, where as families can sit at the back.

We were in a pub garden (at 5:30pm and yes it has a playground and a children's menu) with our children and a group (also breaking the current rules) we swearing every other word. I didn't complain but i did judge them. I hate swearing in front of children.

There used to be a formula of 'the public bar' (no holds barred, sawdust on the floor changed irregularly), and the 'lounge bar', where it was expected that one would wear a collared shirt and tie, ladies could attend without affront, and it would all be a little bit 'naicer'.

I grew up in a pub like that. As a pub brat.

But fundamentally, pubs are adult spaces, for all sorts of adults, them wot swears, and them wot doesn't, and they really aren't designed for rug rats. If you're worried about your kids hearing swearing, don't take them to the pub. It might be against your personal sensibilities, but it's not against the law.

@ClickandForget I know i wish there was an edit button

Reading these pages swearing seems to be obligatory, I cannot believe that some of the people on here who seem adjectively challenged modify their language at other times!

There are pubs and pubs though. In the countryside you often don’t have the alternative of going to a cafe or a restaurant - the pub is the only food option, and you don’t have a sports pub and a gastropub and a “lively” pub and a family pub you just have the one so everyone has to rub along together. The beer garden is effectively the family friendly area whether or not they have swings and a slide. I remember having to explain this to American friends who were shocked by the idea of taking small children to a bar and thought it indicative of appalling parenting.

The problem is of course that at the moment everyone wants to be in the garden even if they’d normally be happy by the bar swearing and watching football.

But when did it get okay for swearing to be so common place? Two lads just in our small village shop the other day talking the f-ing loaf of bread and the f-ing paper. Not particularly angrily but just in a "you get the bread and I'll get the paper" kind of way.
And this is 10:30am on a Wednesday morning. You hear so much just in day to day and I simply don't get the need for it.

Pubs are a more adult environment but most now don't survive purely on booze sales. A large chunk of revenue is meals, and so they cater for families as well as sweaty adults far more than they did. I would say that it should almost be a bit like the watershed, after 7pm fair enough, it's adult time so if you choose to take your kids then you know what you're likely to hear. But 2pm in a beer garden with a large children's play area? That's a time and place when it's not appropriate and you shouldn't have to have your kids hear that.

@ifonly4

Swearing is unpleasant and unnecessary in any environment, there are other words you can use to express something funny or something annoying/offensive.

People with limited vocabulary tend to communicate more by swearing. Especially if they've had a drink.

Sweary adults not sweaty. Although likely both at the moment!

Drink problem

I think you have to accept that pubs are adult spaces and accept adult conversation will be taking place. Once I was having lunch in wetherspoons with DH and my 2 and 4 yo and some chap was talking about a trip to a lap dancing club. I think they were too engrossed in their fish fingers to hear much tbh! If they had been having that conversation in a soft play or play park I might have said something but in a pub it comes with the turf.

Maybe the old "public bar" concept might be a bit difficult, but somehow having a "family area" or similar might help.

I agree with you.

Sometimes people's language is horrendous and unnecessary but those same people would F and C in the supermarket or town centre or wherever.

Ds and I popped into village by my parents the other day after (SD and in garden) BBQ at there's.
As we walked past the pub in village square a girl outside said a sentence like

"Well I just don't fucking understand why she didn't just fucking go to that shop in the first place. I fucking told her it sold that brand of lipstick"

Mh ds (who's 15 and autistic) very loudly stated "I'm not sure any of those swear words were necessary and in context"

The security outside ensuring SD was adhered to nearly kissed himself laughing and asked ds if he wanted a job

You can’t control the behaviour of others. Some people swear a lot, others never. I let the things that annoy me, but are ultimately harmless, like swearing, just wash over me.

Mh ds (who's 15 and autistic) very loudly stated "I'm not sure any of those swear words were necessary and in context"

Your DS is fabulous!