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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To prepare DC for the fact that schools may not open?

322 replies

collageofphotos · 01/08/2020 10:34

It's now looking like full school re-opening is in doubt, unfortunately - I'm so torn about whether to be open with my DC (10 and 8) about this fact or just keep talking as though it's definitely all back to normal in September.

I'm leaning towards the latter, but wondered what others are planning to do? For context, one of my DC is desperate to get back to school, the other is absolutely dreading it, which makes things complicated...

It feels like it will be a huge shock to suddenly have to announce on eg Sept 1st (as last-minute announcements seem to be this government's specialty Hmm) that it won't be happening after all, but on the other hand I don't want them to be worried for a whole month before we know what's actually happening...

OP posts:
DoctorYang · 01/08/2020 11:20

Our schools are going back, full time as normal, in just over a week.

DomDoesWotHeWants · 01/08/2020 11:20

We hope they will but they may not. And they may have to close again even if they open. Just be honest with them.

FatCatThinCat · 01/08/2020 11:21

Well, full, full time school opening is a really bad idea for lots of reasons discussed elsewhere, but I’m not seeing any indication any of the UK governments are moving away from the plan. Why do you think this?

Chris Witty said that we were at the limit of what could be opened up. If anything else was to be opened then something already open would have to close. That does indicate that there's a chance they won't open.

CaptainMerica · 01/08/2020 11:30

I would say that it's best to say nothing and wait and see. When the Scottish government announced that it would be blended learning next year, I tried to prepare my DC (6) for the fact that it might only be 2 days per week, he might not be in the same class as his best friend, etc, etc.

He gradually adjusted to the idea, and then they announced it would be full time after all. Which is good, but it was a bit unsettling.

I'd stick to a "things might be a bit different, but teachers are working out how to make everything as easy and fun as they can" line, and leave it there.

FrippEnos · 01/08/2020 11:55

FatCatThinCat

From what whitty said it is more likely that pubs etc. will be locked down than schools not opening.

But who knows?

quizqueen · 01/08/2020 11:55

My granddaughter's school is reopening full time in September but with staggered starts and finish times which is most unhelpful for working parents. My daughter will now have to pay extra for breakfast club, so her child will be mingling with others she doesn't normally have much contact with or ask someone (with the right name.. see later comment) to hold onto her child for up to 30 minutes at the beginning and end of the school day. The resumption of after school activities haven't been announced either yet.

She can't just ask for flexible working times because other parents, who work with her, may also have to be abiding by this system at other schools and there needs to be the correct ratio at her work at all times so there will be a lot of juggling round to do.

Also, I think it will be detrimental to children's concentration because of the disruption it will cause as the staggered times have been arranged by surname, in alphabetical order, rather than by year group. So that means half an hour at the beginning and end of each day with kids arriving and leaving the classroom when there can't be any class teaching. That seems a ridiculous idea to me. I can see the general idea is that they don't want parents hanging around the gate chatting but they haven't factored in that, within a family, there may be children with different surnames so there could be some families who have to hang about for 30 mins twice a day, in the rain possibly, as this school likes most people to walk there and there's very little parking for drop off! This is in a small rural village where there hasn't been a single case of covid, let alone any deaths!!!

netflixismysidehustle · 01/08/2020 11:57

I would mention things changing quickly (the lockdown in the North being given 1.5 hours notice!) but until the head announces closure, I wouldn't say anything so that neither child is disappointed.

Personally I think schools will open in early September but will close within 4-6 weeks based on how poor the plan for secondary schools is.

Didthatreallyhappen2 · 01/08/2020 12:00

I'm telling DD (going into Y10, so start of GCSEs) that there's a good chance that she'll be going back, but quite possibly not full time. There seems to be some suggestion in our area that it might be, say, one week in and two weeks home schooling. She's not happy with that idea, but accepts it might happen. I'd rather she was prepared so she doesn't have a huge shock if it all changes drastically.

Parker231 · 01/08/2020 12:03

news.sky.com/story/coronavirus-national-priority-to-get-children-back-to-school-but-scientists-warn-it-could-require-trade-offs-12040408

Schools need to go back full time with normal hours. Employers need their employees back to work, particularly with the phasing out of the furlough scheme.

Original poster
collageofphotos · 01/08/2020 12:04

Yes, I do wonder if giving some indication that things are uncertain might be best... it's difficult because one DC is in blissful ignorance thinking it's all 'back to normal' in Sept (so would burst their bubble!) the other one keeps announcing that they hate school and don't want to go back (so would give false hope)...

But that's only when school comes up... maybe as PP mentioned it's best to just not talk about it for now - I have a feeling the situation will become clearer even in the next few weeks...

OP posts:
Original poster
collageofphotos · 01/08/2020 12:08

@Parker231 - that bodes well!

OP posts:
Cadent · 01/08/2020 12:09

I'm so torn about whether to be open with my DC (10 and 8) about this fact or just keep talking as though it's definitely all back to normal in September.

I think you're overreacting. There's nothing to be torn up about, just have age appropriate conversations about it. Not sure why everything has to be such a dilemma.

zingally · 01/08/2020 12:09

I haven't seen any indication that the government are deviating away from their plan of a full re-opening of schools... Where are you getting that information?

Mine 2 DCs are both pre-school age for another year, but I'm a primary school teacher.
Schools are, as far as I know (and mine is), prepping a full re-opening in September.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 01/08/2020 12:11

‘Don’t want to get Covid, stay inside’

I take it you are including teaching staff in this?

BelleSausage · 01/08/2020 12:12

It won’t be last minuet. There is an announcement with more guidance on 11th August. If anything will change that will be when we all (staff, parents and kids) find out.

Hopefully they will come up with something sensible for everyone. We’ll have to wait and see.

TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER · 01/08/2020 12:13

My DD is going into Year 6 in September. Her school sent a big, paper based work pack out to all parents at the start of the holidays. The plan is for them to go back but if anything changes over the summer for us to use this pack for 2 weeks of home learning until the school can coordinate online learning again.
DD knows about the pack but I’ve talked about it being a backup option and that she will be going to school in September.
I think it was a really good idea by the school, it takes away any uncertainty for parents and helps the children know there is a plan b should we be affected by a local lockdown.

letsghostdance · 01/08/2020 12:14

@JustFrigginNameChange Delighted that I'm a teacher and now have permission from you to stay home. Feeling blessed.

Unfortunately, the health and wellbeing of staff and children is more important than education at this point. I don't want to have scarred lungs because you don't have the time to teach your kid their times tables.

BelleSausage · 01/08/2020 12:15

@Parker231

Do you think the childless would be happy to lose jobs in affected industries to send schools back full time? Do you think the government will bin the massive investments they’ve made in the hospitality industry to deliver full time face to face for kids.

Remember that something like only 8% of working adults have children under 11 years old.

MotherWol · 01/08/2020 12:17

I'm really struggling with this - DD is an only child, and has found it really hard not spending time with any other children. Her nursery closed in March, and doesn't plan to reopen; she's due to start Reception this year. We've been talking about how school is different to nursery, and she's noticeably happier at the prospect of going to school. If that doesn't happen, I'm not sure what we'll do.

Letseatgrandma · 01/08/2020 12:17

I would imagine they’ll open. I also imagine many will close again throughout the Autumn term.

What a shame the government have put their fingers in their ears with schools and just want them open without any consideration about doing in a way that will actually keep them open. There are going to be a lot of pissed off parents whose children get last minute notification of class/year group/school closures. Let’s hope they blame the government and not the schools when it happens.

I’d just tell your children that hopefully they’ll be going back, but there’s no crystal ball.

Original poster
collageofphotos · 01/08/2020 12:19

@Cadent

I'm so torn about whether to be open with my DC (10 and 8) about this fact or just keep talking as though it's definitely all back to normal in September.

I think you're overreacting. There's nothing to be torn up about, just have age appropriate conversations about it. Not sure why everything has to be such a dilemma.

Yes I probably am overreacting.

I'm just sick of all the uncertainty (as we all are!) and don't want to pass on this stress to the DC... who are already a bit stressed about school going back (in very different ways).

Perhaps it's different if you've never had a DC with hates school, but it makes the summer holidays potentially quite a stressful time, wondering how they will cope in September. That's without covid to factor in!

OP posts:
Original poster
collageofphotos · 01/08/2020 12:20

who hates school

OP posts:
mrpumblechook · 01/08/2020 12:20

I think it's more likely that they will shut pubs and restaurants again if the infection rate is too high. I hope so anyway as children need an education.

SueEllenMishke · 01/08/2020 12:20

Schools not opening will be a disaster on many fronts. It will impact :

Children's education
Children's mental health
The labour market ( and guess which demographic will be most affected - yup that's right - women!)
The economy ( which will have long term health implications)
The mental health of the population in general

I'm not saying this virus isn't serious and we need to do what we can to mitigate the effects but we need schools to open, we need childcare to be available and we need the economy to start functioning again or we're all screwed whether we get the virus or not.

Xuli · 01/08/2020 12:20

But opening schools isn't just a short term economic fix to get parents back to work. It's about the future too, it's about our children's entire lives. I feel desperately sorry for a lot of industries at the moment, but if the government prioritises pubs over my children's education long term, I'll be fucking furious.

Learning at home is a massive disadvantage to thousands and thousands of children. We can't keep doing that long term, even mixing part time school and home learning.