AIBU to ask why some people are so unempathic about the climate crisis?

[Unconquerable]

My neighbour made a casual remark yesterday. Something like “Yep, that’s climate change“. I was shocked because I used to think he didn’t believe in climate change. Two big cars, travels by cruise ship twice a year. I asked if he believed in climate change. He said of course he did but he didn’t care. Has no children and thinks he will be dead before we see the worst effects. As a mother I am shocked, not only that he thinks like that but also that he thinks it is social acceptable to tell me... in all honesty I think I would feel better if he had told me he thought it was all a hoax.
Did he just tell me it is okay if my children will suffer because he will be dead and gone?
Am I being too dramatic?

You're being over dramatic. It sounds like a throw away comment.

Too dramatic! He made a comment. I care deeply about climate change but I don’t burst into tears at the thought of it because that would be exhausting and prevent me from getting on with my life.

I didn’t expect him to burst into tears @Foureyesgood. I never burst into tears at the thought of the climate change.
I am just a bit shocked that he didn’t seem to care because he has no children because I do have children and of course he knows.

I have seen a few threads where people have said 'now they are parents' that they want everyone to stop doing x, y or z to save the planet.

Did he just tell me it is okay if my children will suffer because he will be dead and gone?

Yes I find that dramatic. You could argue if you cared so much about the climate change you wouldn't have had children. Same as saying if you cared you wouldn't have gone on holidays, eat meat etc.

I think people are more concerned about COVID than anything else at present.

I feel the same way as the man. I won't have any children so I don't care as much. If you are so concerned about your children you have to make the changes. Do YOU use disposable diapers? Say no to plastic toys? Use hand me downs instead of buying new clothes for your children? Be honest. Parents will reproduce many times and then use disposable and new things for their babies and then turn around and complain about child free people contributing to global warming and climate crisis. Your neighbour has done his part by not reproducing. Having children is the worst thing you can do for the environment. Use your anger and reflect on your own choices.

“As a mother I am shocked...”

WON’T SOMEONE PLEASE, THINK OF THE CHILDREN! wrings hands

@thegcatsmother I am concerned about both but think the climate crisis will be a far greater problem than COVID in the long run.

@Hannahmates

I feel the same way as the man. I won't have any children so I don't care as much. If you are so concerned about your children you have to make the changes. Do YOU use disposable diapers? Say no to plastic toys? Use hand me downs instead of buying new clothes for your children? Be honest. Parents will reproduce many times and then use disposable and new things for their babies and then turn around and complain about child free people contributing to global warming and climate crisis. Your neighbour has done his part by not reproducing. Having children is the worst thing you can do for the environment. Use your anger and reflect on your own choices.

Actually this poster put it better than I did.

If you don’t have dc then I do think you can think differently about it.

For a start but having dc has lowered impact dramatically.

You're being over-dramatic. Climate change doesn't mean the world will suddenly end, it will be a gradual decline over several generations. Life's too short to worry about what might happen in fifty or a hundred years, enjoy the moment.

We need to get back to respecting nature. We need to enjoy the resources the planet gives us. If we overuse them, climate change is nature's way of dealing with us. So what? Species come and go. It's arrogant to assume that humans are special somehow and have a right to exist forever.

Did he just tell me it is okay if my children will suffer because he will be dead and gone?

No, he said he doesn't care about what happens after he is dead. It doesn't mean that he is actively trying to make your children suffer, it's just that why do your children's right to a happy future outweigh his right to a happy present?

You should think of it this way since he has no children he has done his part for the environment. In the future your children will have less competition for basic needs like water and food because other people like your neighbour chose not to have children. And if you are not using/did not use reusable diapers you have no room to feel offended at your neighbour.

I meant ‘not having dc..’

You're not being over dramatic at all. That's how you feel about it and therefore your feelings are valid. Your neighbour feels about it differently, but that doesn't negate your feelings. Climate change affects the whole world and many of us have such a blasé attitude to it. xx

@Hannahmates

I feel the same way as the man. I won't have any children so I don't care as much. If you are so concerned about your children you have to make the changes. Do YOU use disposable diapers? Say no to plastic toys? Use hand me downs instead of buying new clothes for your children? Be honest. Parents will reproduce many times and then use disposable and new things for their babies and then turn around and complain about child free people contributing to global warming and climate crisis. Your neighbour has done his part by not reproducing. Having children is the worst thing you can do for the environment. Use your anger and reflect on your own choices.

Changing your own choices will have little impact. In order to have an impact on climate change, you need to change your lifestyle and that of others (esp. Businesses and the worst polluters).

Obviously that's very hard to do...

I don't have children. I'm massively concerned about the climate crisis. I think for me it's feeling anger at the things people are doing now to the natural world-polluting rivers, decimating fish stocks, burning the rainforest etc than concern for what the world will be like for future generations (although of course that is a worry too!)

@contrmary

You're being over-dramatic. Climate change doesn't mean the world will suddenly end, it will be a gradual decline over several generations. Life's too short to worry about what might happen in fifty or a hundred years, enjoy the moment.

We need to get back to respecting nature. We need to enjoy the resources the planet gives us. If we overuse them, climate change is nature's way of dealing with us. So what? Species come and go. It's arrogant to assume that humans are special somehow and have a right to exist forever.

Did he just tell me it is okay if my children will suffer because he will be dead and gone?

No, he said he doesn't care about what happens after he is dead. It doesn't mean that he is actively trying to make your children suffer, it's just that why do your children's right to a happy future outweigh his right to a happy present?

“Species come and go?“ So you think it is okay if our species has to “go“. Would you also feel like this about it if it would happen during your life time?

Of course he is not trying to make them suffer on purpose but he seems to think it is okay as long as it means he can continue to go on cruise vacations. That seemed to be what he was saying.

Tbf, you're right about him not having children being a very positive step, even if it wasn't his reason for doing so.

I feel the same as him, I did my bit by having no bio children (and I don't fly)

A family member has 7 children and posts constantly about climate death - I don't really get it

"Of course he is not trying to make them suffer on purpose but he seems to think it is okay as long as it means he can continue to go on cruise vacations. That seemed to be what he was saying"

Yes he's right. He has done his part by not reproducing and you have contributed to climate change massively by reproducing. You should focus on what you can do to save the environment for your children's future. I notice you haven't answered on whether you used disposable diapers, hand me downs clothes, plastic toys etc. Honestly though it's not any of your business what your neighbour does. Let him enjoy his cruise vacations. He sounds like an older man. You're being dramatic and also hypocritical.

'Climate change' is just a buzz word. In my days, it was called global warming.

I used to be laughed at a jeered at for quietly trying to do my bit towards reducing climate change and pollution in the 1980s, 1990s, early2000s. I wasn't preaching at other people or telling them they were crap for not doing the same (which was basically my mistake, I think.) then I got a told repeatedly that I didn't care about the environment because I didn't have children, that I didn't know what love was, because I didn't have children, that it didn't matter if I died or not if I don't have children, that if I do an act of kindness for someone they will be angry if they find out that I don't have children.
My caring can't have been real caring, because I don't have children.

In short, I am worthless scum, because I don't have children.

Cheer up, OP, because I am planning when best to kill myself, so that I am not breathing out carbon dioxide . I am planning to do this in a few years time (probably about two or three when I will be no longer useful to provide child care for a young relative with special needs.)

But don't worry, my mother died a few years ago so except for my husband, who is childless and a best friend and her husband, also childless, no-one will be anything other than happy that I am not around pouting the planet.

Your neighbour has been told repeatedly that he doesn't care about the planet because he doesn't have children. He has just believed it without a fight.

Did he just tell me it is okay if my children will suffer because he will be dead and gone?
Am I being too dramatic?

Yep, extremely dramatic. He said no such thing.
I'm a mother, I've been known to say "ahh love climate change in action" during a warmer than average winter day as I despise the cold.
I also don't go out of my way to do the green thing. I do everything on preference for a product, price and convenience.
Some people simply have other priorities.

@Hannahmates

I feel the same way as the man. I won't have any children so I don't care as much. If you are so concerned about your children you have to make the changes. Do YOU use disposable diapers? Say no to plastic toys? Use hand me downs instead of buying new clothes for your children? Be honest. Parents will reproduce many times and then use disposable and new things for their babies and then turn around and complain about child free people contributing to global warming and climate crisis. Your neighbour has done his part by not reproducing. Having children is the worst thing you can do for the environment. Use your anger and reflect on your own choices.

This covers it very well!

But yes, you're being over dramatic. You've extrapolated what you think he meant to fit something you can be outraged about.

But you need to look at your own choices, you won't change anyone elses view. He may go on holiday, but is that a big of an environmental impact as have children? I doubt it.

Fuck me, the OP is far from the most dramatic poster on this thread.

Anyway maybe your neighbour has switched off from the climate change issue because every time it's raised it turns into an "I cause less climate change than you" pissing contest, just like it has here.