To let family camp in the garden?

[pastaparadise]

Ds has asked if she and her dh/ kids can camp in our (large) garden this weekend. They live 4 hours drive away and want to see both us and our dm (who lives very close to us). Unless they drive up and back in a day, they need to stay overnight.

I thought that we would camp too. Our kids are too young to reliably socially distance (between 3 and 7 years), but adults could keep a distance, our garden is large, can keep indoor trips to toilet only (we have 2 bathrooms) to minimise risk.

They don't want to camp in dms garden as it's quite small. dm is physically well but early 80s so they don't want to go in her house.

Dh thinks iabu - they shouldnt stay with us as it increases our risk of catching cv. but I dont think camping increases risk compared to just seeing them for the day with kids playing. We're due to holiday near the same place to them in a few weeks (coincidentally) and he was happy with the idea of seeing them outside on a few occasions then. We havent seen them since New Year and i would really like dc to see their cousins. None of us are shielding/ vulnerable.

AIBU to allow them to camp with us?

Of course you can let them camp in your garden. Two households can mix indoors together now anyway. Your DH needs to relax!

If they’re happy to camp then let them, you’ve been able to meet outside for some time now anyway.

No. You must never see your family ever again unless it is behind a screen of cleansing fire.
Or your dh needs to get a grip.
There is no middle ground.

Is there a reason he’s going over an above the guidelines now?

@TheMandalorian

No. You must never see your family ever again unless it is behind a screen of cleansing fire. Or your dh needs to get a grip. There is no middle ground.

🤣🤣

Possibly your DH just doesn't want to camp in his own garden.
If you can assign one bathroom in your house for the visitors only and leave it empty for a day or so after they leave keeping outside otherwise then it sounds safe enough.
If your DH is really not comfortable with it could they use your house as a base to visit your DM while you are away?

It's fine. Sounds like a lovely way to catch up. Enjoy.

He thinks government guidance is biased for economic reasons and that we need to be more careful and minimise risk.

They are away the same week as us so can't visit mum while we're away.

i feel them camping is no more risky than the kids playing. I've said he doesnt have to camp if he doesnt want to. I'd camp with the dc at a local campsite but they're all fully booked.

not sure if the middle ground comment is being sarcastic? I'm doing my best to make him be comfortable but I'd really like to see my family. I'd understand if we were being really strict elsewhere, but dc have been to school/ nursery. seeing friends outside etc, so feels hard to justify to dsis why we wont allow this

If they’re going to school & nursery etc then he’s really going OTT, camping in a garden with family is much less risky!

Unless you or he is vulnerable then it’s fine

He's being OTT, especially given your ages, children etc.

How is it any different to camping on a campsite? Ask him. There is absolutely no reason to not do it.

I'm just back from a weeks campsite camping with hundreds of tents on site (all socially distanced!).

FFS - we live just inside the area now in lockdown again (ie about 0.5 miles) so now it's technically illegal and dh is saying he'll call the police if they visit. I am beyond pissed off. He is now happy and seemingly couldn't give a shit about the impact on the rest of us.

We can see them in a park/ pub/ campsite etc but not sensibly in our garden. I feel the dc will end up going over a year without seeing their cousins.

Lockdown aside, it's much less risky than a campsite as they'll have their own bathroom and not have to share with loads of others.
Lockdown makes it a bit more complicated.

Lots of tents up in gardens around here, which rather implies that a lot of people have had the same idea and are happy to do it.

@pastaparadise

FFS - we live just inside the area now in lockdown again (ie about 0.5 miles) so now it's technically illegal and dh is saying he'll call the police if they visit. I am beyond pissed off. He is now happy and seemingly couldn't give a shit about the impact on the rest of us.

We can see them in a park/ pub/ campsite etc but not sensibly in our garden. I feel the dc will end up going over a year without seeing their cousins.

He’ll call the police?!

Does he really not like your sister or something?

He’ll call the police?! My word, slightly OTT!

If you are in the lockdown area that changes things. What if everybody in the lockdown area did the same thing?

Well your DH is a real delight isn't he?

You’re quite right, you could see them in a pub/park etc, we come into contact with others while shopping, yet he won’t let your family stay, and you’ve thought if everything to do it safely, I was about to say go for it and have a lovely time with then but now see your update, he’ll call the police?! Sorry he’s making it so difficult for you 😔

The new lockdown does change things for you but he doesn’t need to be so smug about it does he 😔

If you're in that area, I'd say it's unwise.

I know that it's a huge area, and that the rise in cases varies massively from ward to ward, but even if you are in an area with a very low infection rate some fucker would be bound to grass you up.

Not mentioning in your initial post that you are in a lockdown area makes the voting results unreliable.

You are not allowed to visit other people's gardens in the lockdown area, let alone camp in them. Can't your sister delay her visit for a few weeks until the situation is hopefully improved?

Your dh sounds a bit miserable tbh nothing wrong with this

To be fair when the OP originally posted she wasn't in the lockdown area