My ex was abusive (physically and emotionally) and because of this doesn't have my new address.
Since DD was about 3 months old he has seen her very rarely, sometimes only once or twice a month for less than 2 hours and usually in my car (while I was driving him somewhere) so has spent pretty much no actual time with her.
I have offered for him to see her at his mums, my mums, or at the park but he says no and demands to come to my house. I've obviously said no and usually it ends in an argument as he blames me for the incidents where he was violent (disrespecting him etc..) and him slamming down the phone.
He called me earlier and told me that before I go to work tomorrow to drop my daughter at his mums instead of my sister where she usually goes as his other son is there and he wants to see them together. He has made no effort or suggestion to see her other than this and hasn't seen her properly out of her car seat in 4 months. He knows nothing about what she likes, has no respect for her routine and could not recognise basic cues when she was little (hungry or tired). This obviously makes me nervous about leaving her with him for 9 hours.
She is very clingy at the moment and is nervous around strangers which I've explained to him and my sister has plans to go out with her friend and baby tomorrow anyway. He has given me no notice and is now saying that I'm stopping him from seeing his child. AIBU to not leave her with him tomorrow?