To ask if you can live in a house share with a toddler?

[WhereAreAllTheTeaspoons]

I start uni in September and have a toddler DD. I've posted numerous times under different usernames about useless DP who is now ex useless DP. We currently live together in a house rented in his name, it's not an option to stay here as I simply can't afford the rent alone.

In September I'll get a student loan, but I'm struggling to work out how much extra I might get from universal credit. I obviously need to call and speak to some one as online calculators simply arnt designed to take students into account, but the phone lines are always so busy I'm struggling to be able to have that conversation.

Money is going to be tight and I think I'm going to have to get rid of my car to save on money so ideally I'm going to have to live close to university. All the places I can find within the budget I'm aiming for are for rooms in shared accommodation. Is this even a possibility with DD if I found a room with an en suite or am I being completely bonkers?

Think laterally - for example, could you lodge with another lone parent and maybe even get a bit of a discount for doing some childcare? Housekeeping with accommodation? Your union should be able to hook you up with other single parent students, pool your resources?

I must admit I would have hated to share with a toddler when I was a student, and I'm pretty sure you would have hated sharing with me!

But the main thing is - talk to the SU. They are there to help you and they absolutely will.

It wouldn’t be fair to your housemates. Speak to your local authority wrt housing options, shelter, and of course your uni

Sorry to be clear my last paragraph is in response to you getting a flat and subletting it

There may be limited student accommodation for you, it’s called family accommodation

www.ucas.com/undergraduate/applying-university/individual-needs/students-parenting-responsibilities

You are probably eligible for parents’ learning allowance too - this is done through the student finance application and is given in addition to the student loan, but doesn’t need to be paid back

Do you know who the student welfare advisor is for your course? They are a good person to speak to find out what other help and family accommodation is available

It isn't fair to the other housemates or DD. She needs space to play and you will feeling on edge about her in common spaces. You cant keep her cooped up in a bedroom.

Hope you find a solution though, seems a nightmare. Can family help out?

No family to help out unfortunately. It's this exact situation which has kept me and exdp together for so long but it's just unbearable now yet impossible to find anything else. It's so frustrating

It's a huge huge huge safeguarding risk. There is no way I would contemplate it, and I lived in a caravan for 2 years.

Not a normal student houseshare. Bad idea for you/your child and your housemates!

Possibly if you could be a lodger with someone, maybe with kids of their own, but I don’t think many people looking for lodgers would want someone with a toddler.

Yeah, even with family accommodation from your university, you’ll be sharing common areas with strangers. This is an example:

www.ucl.ac.uk/accommodation/ucl-halls/self-catered-accommodation/bernard-johnson-house

Definitely not on a student house share, I would contact local councils or room sharing sites and look for single parents etc maybe?

Which town/city are you going to uninin, maybe someone here can help

Look online there are single parents living together (think this is a great idea) who are similar situations

A house share with students is not ideal for a toddler. Parties lots of people coming and going drugs (I know not all students) you can’t have any control over what other tenants are doing

I wouldn’t recommend trying to sublet, it is very rare to have a tenancy agreement that would allow it. Try and find someone else looking for accommodation and then apply for a property as joint tenants. Maybe ask on some local Facebook pages? There could be a single parent with a spare room, who could really benefit from having you as a lodger, if they worked shifts for example.

I take it he wont be paying any maintenance or anything like that? Definitely second speaking to your uni. At mine they had family units on campus. Does yours have something similar? Could living on campus be an option?

Maybe as a lodger in someones house, absolutely not in a student house. I would be worried about social services getting involved

@ItsAlwaysSunnyOnMN

Look online there are single parents living together (think this is a great idea) who are similar situations

A house share with students is not ideal for a toddler. Parties lots of people coming and going drugs (I know not all students) you can’t have any control over what other tenants are doing

I've tried looking online and I must be looking in the wrong place because I just dont seem to be finding anything of use to me. Probably doesn't help that I'm stressed and I'm just panic googling. Would you mind linking anything you've found?

I'm afraid it really wouldn't be suitable to houseshare OP. Unless you can find someone to share with that also has a child.

A hopeful of students are at the very least likely to be out clubbing or partying til all hours, bringing people back for a shag, bringing people back after the pub to carry on drinking. And that's if they're well behaved.

And from the housemates perspective they're not going to want a child waking them up early, playing in communal spaces, or making normal toddler noise when they're trying to frantically study for exams or write dissertations.

[quote Hairthrowaway]There may be limited student accommodation for you, it’s called family accommodation

www.ucas.com/undergraduate/applying-university/individual-needs/students-parenting-responsibilities[/quote]
Yes, I'd try your university first - mine definitely had family housing for "mature" students. There should also be daycare available, although spaces are very limited so you'd need to apply as soon as it's open for applications.

I think it is unlikely for you to find a house share with a child. Can you not stay sharing with ex, as friends? If he leaves, maybe you could get a lodger.

Could you run a small car? Low insurance, tax, fuel etc. Although it would cost £s each month to run, it could give you the flexibility to rent further out and more cheaply, off setting the cost of running the car.

Just to say that as a student with a DC you are definitely eligible for UC incl some housing benefit so talk to them as your first port of call. You might find it covers you for a 1-2 bed place. I also remember my uni have separate halls/appartment for students with DC do might be worth contacting them.

Don't panic until you know how much housing benefit you'll get.

No advice op but I just wanted to wish you all the luck in the world . (The idea about sharing with another single mother sounds good though.)

Have you approached your council? They might be able to help. Even if its just finding a landlord who will take you. They will tell you that until you are actually homeless you won't receive help but its at least worth finding out procedures. I'm a student lone parent and its been mad trying to juggle but its my way out of the benefits trap and no future.

@wherealltheteaspoons

You can put yourself on spare room as someone looking to find a flat mate. People could then contact you.

Ah ok so I've found that my maintenance loan is divided monthly across the academic year for the purposes of calculating universal credit, so this would mean I would be entitled to a bit extra help. The page I've found this on isnt too recent but hopefully that would be the case and would help me massively.