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Family one. Posting for traffic

4 replies

damnthisvirusandmarriage · 25/07/2020 20:24

So I’ve not spoken to my sister for nearly 4 years after a falling out.

I think my mum sides with her. I’ve always accepted the blame until I got married (that’s another story) and husband helped me see that I was the scapegoat.

My mum also tells the extended family stuff about me I guess. And they then favour my sister too. I get excluded. She’s is the preferential sister. Mum and her holiday together. Shop together. Always have. For years. She gets money. Help when things break (cars, home stuff).

I’m learning more about relationships and my sister defo has narcissistic tendencies. I’m wondering if my mum does too following a period of her ignoring me because I lost my shit when our dog almost got run over.

Having said that, I’ve stopped contact with many friends I shared with my sister. And since, they seem hell bent on lifting her pedestal.

So, maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m awful. I don’t have any real friends. I’m weird I think. TBH wonder if I’m on the spectrum. Maybe I’m a narcissist?

I’m really struggling with these thoughts for many years.

Going to speak to my counsellor about it..

OP posts:
underneaththeash · 25/07/2020 20:33

Who knows on Mumsnet?
I know 2 NC families where the daughter is completely nutterly in the wrong and 2 where the parents are completely nutterly in the wrong.
A counsellor may help you work it out. Friends probably less so, as you’ll tell it from your side.

I’d write it all down first..

roxfox · 25/07/2020 20:37

Can relate to this more than I'd like to.

Notimeforaname · 25/07/2020 20:51

Sorry op that's not a pleasant way to live. I have similar issues with my sister.

Dr Ramani (has a YouTube channel, books etc) really helped me understand narcissism. Do look at her videos. She covers every type of narcissist and their roles in family/work/life.
Hope that helps op.

Notimeforaname · 25/07/2020 20:51

www.youtube.com/c/DoctorRamani

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