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AIBU?

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Original poster

Man who lives next door tried gaining entry to my flat last night. What should I do?

71 replies

greeneyes3 · 23/07/2020 09:26

I live by myself in a block of flats and have done for the last 5 years. It’s a mix of private properties and council properties. I private rent but next door to me is a block of council flats. There is a man who lives in one of the flats who I believe is a drug addict (have heard through the grapevine), apparently he was placed here by the council due to being homeless. As far as I’m aware he’s never caused any trouble and I think he mostly keeps himself to himself. There has been times where he’s come home blatantly intoxicated and has not been able to get into his flat for some reason. A couple of weeks ago at around 2am, I couldn’t sleep so decided to get some fresh air and take the recycling out and I found him asleep in the middle of his garden, I did ask him if he was okay but he ignored me.

Last night I was getting ready for bed and went into my spare bedroom to grab something and noticed he was outside his flat again trying to get inside. It was around midnight. Around 30 mins later I heard a banging/tapping sound and went to the window and noticed my front gate was wide open. I clocked him trying to open my front door. Luckily I always lock my door even when I’m in the house so he couldn’t get in but it has left me feeling a bit unsettled. When I shouted down “excuse me, what are you doing?”, he just ran off. There has been a couple of times over the last few months where I’ve woken up to find my gate open after I’ve shut it and at the time I didn’t really think much of it, but it does make sense now.

I’m not sure what his attentions were or what he would have done if the door had been unlocked so I do feel a bit uncomfortable now. He obviously knew it was the wrong flat as he’d already tried to get into his property first. In the 5 years I’ve lived here I’ve always felt safe as there has never been any trouble here. In hindsight I probably should have called the police or at least reported it but I was just so tired and needed to try and get some sleep as I was up early this morning for work. I did think about approaching him in the street the next time I see him but I’m not sure how sensible/safe that would be. I don’t know him well enough to know what his reaction would be. I have thought about possibly contacting the council and just asking them to have a quick word with him but I don’t even know his name, although I could probably find out from one of my neighbours. Any advice? I don’t want any trouble but I would like to feel safe in my own home. I don’t bother anyone or cause trouble so it would be nice if others could do the same.

OP posts:
Original poster
greeneyes3 · 23/07/2020 09:30

Also if there are any posters on here who work for the council or a housing association I'd love to hear what your advice would be. If I contacted you about one of your tenants doing something like this, would you deal with it or is it seen as more of a personal issue? Thanks

OP posts:
UnfinishedSymphon · 23/07/2020 09:30

You've said he's come home pissed lots of times, hopefully it was just that, he was so pissed he got your doors confused.

Not really sure why the fact that he's council matters, private tenants get pissed and do drugs too

Stingybath · 23/07/2020 09:32

He was probably drunk and when you knocked he thought crap this isn't my gaff.

I don’t bother anyone or cause trouble so it would be nice if others could do the same.

That would be nice wouldn't it.

Original poster
greeneyes3 · 23/07/2020 09:34

I'm not sure @UnfinishedSymphon. As I've already explained he'd already tried to get into his own flat first and was unsuccessful. I live on the ground floor and you have to walk down steps to get to my flat so not sure how it could be a mistake.

OP posts:
ElementalIllusion · 23/07/2020 09:36

You need to ring the police and report it and you should keep an eye out and report any further instances.

Addicts can be unpredictable and can easily escalate their behaviour, you should log this and the other incidents just in case something else happens or he doesn’t give up just because the door is locked next time.

Tiltedclone · 23/07/2020 09:37

If he’s tried to get into his own flat but couldn’t, he might have thought that was the wrong door and so tried yours instead thinking that must be the right one as he couldn’t get into the other.

Ravenclawgirl · 23/07/2020 09:38

I work for a Housing Association and if you called us we would tell you to report it to the police.

It's not a personal matter but it needs to be the police who would deal with it. You could call the HA with an incident number from the police for them to make a note of. That's all they would do.

ElementalIllusion · 23/07/2020 09:40

I think it’s incredibly unlikely he just got the wrong door by mistake since he’d already spent a while trying and failing to get into his own flat.

Chances are he was just hoping to get in anywhere possible so he could sleep somewhere warm but he could also have been looking to steal or something more sinister... you just don’t know... and that’s why you need to report it.

zingally · 23/07/2020 09:40

As a temporary fix, is there any way you could lock your gate, at least overnight?

Carandi · 23/07/2020 09:40

Can you invest in a Ring doorbell or CCTV? If he's doing this repeatedly then it would be good for you to have some footage of him trying your door or entering your front garden that you can use as evidence if you go to council or police. Make sure the locks on your door are up to standard.

Crunchymum · 23/07/2020 09:40

We used to live in flats, and we were opposite an alcoholic.

We were bottom floor, just two doors (ours and his) and if he managed to get in the communal front door then it was 50/50 if he'd try to get into the right flat.

If he came to ours we would just shout "wrong door Jim" as wed hear him fumbling with keys and he'd pootle off.

We are on London so doors were always locked (in fact it was a type of door that locked as soon as you shut it)

  • if he couldn't make it in the communal door he'd sleep in our shared garden.

We lived there for about 2 years without trouble or incident but I didn't live alone.

I'd start keeping a log @greeneyes3 and see if it continues / if there is a pattern / if he seems genuinely mistaken or you think he is trying to gain access.

TheVanguardSix · 23/07/2020 09:41

I think your last post says it all, OP. It was not a drunken mistake.
I'd install a camera and monitor this if you're unwilling to involve police at present. I'd make sure my locks are extra secure on all doors and windows. Never sleep with anything open/unlocked.

TimeWastingButFun · 23/07/2020 09:43

Definitely put up cctv and log the call with the police, just so they have a record.

TinkerPony · 23/07/2020 09:46

Please report to police. Your other neighbours could be next. Even just to have a paper trial a record of his behaviour.
Looking for quick opportunity to feed his next fix. Can you lock your gate too?

TinkerPony · 23/07/2020 09:47

To deter him that you on to him without confronting him.

Original poster
greeneyes3 · 23/07/2020 09:49

@Ravenclawgirl thank you for clarifying that.

I think I will contact 101 after work tonight and report it. At least there will be a record of it then. Hopefully it won't happen again though. I can't lock the front gate unfortunately. I might speak to my landlord this weekend and see what he thinks I could do to make it a bit safer for myself.

OP posts:
Requinblanc · 23/07/2020 09:55

Report it to the police.

If he was placed in the flat by a housing association/the council also report the behaviour to them.

endofthelinefinally · 23/07/2020 09:57

I am sure your landlord would be willing to fit a lock to the gate. A bolt with a padlock would work.
I have a cycle lock on my back gate - luckily the fence is wire and has a metal post next to the gate and the gate has bars so the cable bit goes through both easily.

duffeldaisy · 23/07/2020 09:58

We once got 'broken into' by a drunk neighbour. (Our door had a confusing lock and my husband hadn't done it properly that night). I woke up to hear him stagger into the house and was terrified. Went down, and he was asleep on the sofa. I shouted at him and he was mortified, and staggered back out again apologising! It could well be a similar situation!

If you don't share your gate with anyone else, maybe ask the landlord if you can put a bolt on the back. As long as you put it right in the middle, so no-one can reach over to unlock it, it'll be enough without a padlock.

Zaphodsotherhead · 23/07/2020 09:58

I don't think he was looking to steal - if he was he presumably wouldn't have tried his own door first!

I reckon he was just chancing it looking for somewhere to sleep and thought your hallway would be better than the garden if your door was open.

Report it and then it's recorded. It may happen again if he's in the habit of staggering back blotto, but if your door is always locked and he can't get in then there's not much more you can do.

fairydustandpixies · 23/07/2020 10:04

I volunteer with vulnerable people and one guy told me about the time he went home, absolutely pissed out of his head, fell into the lounge and cursed his 'missus' for moving the furniture around. Watched some TV impressed that she'd bought a new, larger one whilst he had been out drinking all day, went to bed and found her in bed with another man. Yep, you guessed it - he'd let himself into the wrong flat!! They'd left the door unlocked and in he went!!

Teddybear27 · 23/07/2020 10:05

I would definitely get in touch with the police, whatever the reason, he should not be trying to get into a house, yes, he probably was drunk but the police need to know and keep your front door locked...

SchadenfreudePersonified · 23/07/2020 10:07

I also think he was probably just hoping for somewhere dry to sleep, but I wouldn't take the risk. Report and take extra precautions eg doubly check your doors and windows are locked etc.

I'd be very worried, too - living alone leaves you vulnerable sometimes.

Original poster
greeneyes3 · 23/07/2020 10:07

I think he probably was just looking for somewhere to sleep and I suppose anywhere is better than the garden. He doesn't seem like the type of person to hurt someone but you just never know... I don't understand why he doesn't have a key to his own home though. This happens every time he comes home intoxicated, it's really strange.

OP posts:
RunningFromInsanity · 23/07/2020 10:08

I would also report to housing association so they can make a note of it. If he causes too much trouble they can give him warnings etc

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