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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To possibly cause family upset?

2 replies

FeelinFagin · 20/07/2020 22:20

Basically it's DH's adult niece's birthday in just over a week. They live a couple of hours away and we have often visited for a few days at a time, taking MIL up with us. This has been stopped due to Covid obviously but MIL is raring to go back up now that lockdown is relaxed.

We've agreed to go in just over a week but chatting on the phone today it was revealed that DN is actually off abroad tomorrow for a holiday with her pals then will be having a house party with 20+ or her mates round the day before we go up.
DH and I have been very, VERY cautious over lockdown, even going as far as washing shopping because my dad has just been diagnosed with a terminal illness. A nasty, fast as fuck illness that means he may not be here in a month or two. I NEED to be healthy. I cannot afford to lose two weeks or more to Covid-19. If I get the call, I will need to travel immediately the 4hrs to my father's side.

I really don't want to take this risk, going to a house to stay where there is such an increased risk of possible Coronavirus exposure but I will be causing a hell of a kick off with all parties involved if I declare that DH, the kids and I can no longer go.

What should I do? Suck it up and take the chance? Or dig my heels in and be the bitch? The "big fearty, who's too scared to leave the house"?

OP posts:
HouchinBawbags · 20/07/2020 22:22

To clarify, DN still lives with her parents so it's DH's DSis and BIL's house we're visiting.

firstpregnancy1 · 21/07/2020 02:57

I would definitely cancel/rearrange for a few weeks time to allow for a period of time to pass since she's returned to Uk and had her house party.

Your dads health is much more important here than her birthday and you were more than happy to go and visit until you found out about the holiday and party which is completely a good enough reason to readdress the risk and change your mind.

Your husband and all the rest of the family who might be put out, should absolutely understand, and if you rearrange for a few weeks time so that any signs of coronavirus in your nieces 'circle' can be seen, then hopefully they'll understand. They should.

I say all of this as someone who has been reasonably relaxed with risk regarding coronavirus.

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