Friend ghosting me?

[sieara]

I feel rather upset

So I have a friend, we are actually related through marriage, not immediate, that's essentially how we met and became quite good friends. Goin shopping together, gym, Eating out. We were even pregnant together at the same time...twice! Have a lot in common. Known her for 8 years.

We would talk a lot via mssgs for hours when we haven't seen each other in a while just catching up. Can I just add this isn't one sided, majority of the time it would be her starting the convos that would then last hours.
Haven't seen her since lockdown.
Well anyways, I think just over 2 weeks ago I messaged her asking how she is and her kids. She responded saying they are fine. And that was it, she didn't ask about me and my kids which was strange as she normally always would! I thought it's quite odd, but put it down to maybe she's busy and will mssg me later on, (that's what we normally tend to do, if either one is busy it's normally a vague mssg and later would mssg back properly.)
Even if she forgot about it, doesn't make sense that it's over two weeks and nothing, in the past if she forgot to mssg back, she would the next day and state she forgot.
Anyways I put it to the back of my mind, and didn't put too much thought in to it.

I messaged her today just asking has she been in to town since reopening of shops and If she fancies meeting up.
Well she saw the mssg and didn't reply, she's been online lots of time since, (yes I've been stalking her last seen 🙄, she's actually online right now too)
I can't help but feel she is doing this purposely. I honestly feel like crying as I can't understand why she would do this, I scrolled up on the chat To see what we last spoke about and it was completely normal, mid may is the last time she properly spoke to me. I haven't spoken about her to anyone, all I can think is either someone is stirring things and have said something to her but again I don't know why would anyone do this.

I know she's the type taht if she no longer wants to be good friends with someone, she will just pull away and if the person mssgs or she sees them then she will just say the basic that is needed, she openly has said that to me when she fell out with someone. So I know that is what she would do and I feel she is doing it to me.
I would rather she tell me what I've done or said

I don't know what am trying to achieve with this post

I agree with @NoCauseRebel she has form.

Do you have other friends? Tbh even if I didn't I wouldn't want to be friends with someone like this. She sounds very immature. She may like the attention of someone chasing her? The meme sounds pathetic.

@katy1213

Why don't you just pick up the phone and, you know, speak to each other? Like friends used to do in the olden days? And then you could have a normal conversation without having to read multiple meanings into a months-old text? Ridiculous to be on the verge of tears because someone hasn't replied to a message for what could be any number of reasons!

Completely agree! What's with all the hand-wringing when you haven't even tried to call her? If she doesn't answer leave her a message saying you miss her and are worried about her.

Often when I'm in the middle of having a bad time I don't want to speak to friends as it means having to explain everything that's been happening and it's emotionally draining, so I struggle through alone. If she's having a crisis hearing your voice might be what she needs

@AmICrazyorWhat2

I'd try phoning her and see how she reacts when she picks up the phone. If she doesn't answer, leave her a message and see what happens.

Sometimes ppl go through stressful periods and can't talk to anyone,even their closest friends. I had alot on at work recently and ignored phone calls and texts from a close friends for a while. I was too stressed to talk! I phoned her afterwards and explained I'd had a horrible time and was sorry for not responding. We're fine again.

Whatever you do, don't keep checking up on her online, it'll only make you upset. She'll get in touch when she's ready - or if she doesn't, you'll need to accept it and move on. I know it's difficult.

Didn't RTFT and basically posted this! I agree with you, obvs

I want to end a friendship or at least really cut down on contact. I have been her friend for a while but at the moment she is really irritating me. I don't know if there is a kind way to do this because ghosting is horrible and I feel uncertain if ending the friendship is really what I want.

I'm dealing with a few deaths and don't feeling like talking. I told her I needed space yet I've been bombarded with text messages and then upset messages that I've not responded. I have other people in my life and I need to focus on them at the moment.

I think the best thing you could do for your friend is back off for a while.

You need to as her if you’ve upset her x