Would this bother you?

[Caramel78]

My DP (both in our 30s, engaged and been together 5 years) sent a message to his work colleague saying “Sarah‘s (name change) ass is looking amazing today. I could look at it all day”.
He had left his Facebook open on our iPad.

I feel really annoyed about it for so many different reasons. I would hate to think of men writing pervy inappropriate messages about me to each other at work, so to know my DP is like that has massively riled me up.
She’s also 10 years younger than me and I now feel rubbish about myself.
My DP definitely doesn’t seem the “type” to write messages like that but I guess he turns into a pathetic immature sleaze with his mates.

I spoke to my sister and best friend about it. My sister shared my views and said I should let him know how vile his behaviour is. My best friend was the complete opposite though and said I need to let it go as it’s just a bit of fun and everyone discusses attractive people with their friends.

Would this anger you or would you just roll your eyes/laugh it off/not even think anything of it?

I’d be utterly disgusted if my dh did this. 😢

He'd be sacked at my work if found out. Thankfully I work somewhere that won't tolerate boy's banter.
I'd have to call him out on it, and see his response. If he thinks its normal, I'd seriously have to reconsider my future with him.

It would totally bother me.

Firstly, poor sarah, being stared at all day while she working.

Secondly, it's in the present tense, presumably he is at work, emailing a colleague, about another colleague in a sexual way. Definitely grounds for a disciplinary if he was caught.

Thirdly...yeah everyone thinks stuff like this. But there are 3 types of people in my opinion. One type who think it and don't say it, because it's kind of disrespectful to you, in my opinion. I never discuss other men that I find attractive as I feel its rude to my partner. I appreciate others see it differently. Some people will say stuff like this, but they are generally gushy people and will always make clear that they love their partner and everyone will just take it with a pinch of salt as that's their personality. Third there are people who are sleazy and pervy and subtly make out that they are 'making do' with what they've got at home, and don't care who knows what they're like.

I've worked in a male dominated environment, some men comment yes but not all of them

You posted about this exact same thing about six months ago. So he’s still doing it then?

Hmm

I cannot believe people are saying 'oh that's just how men are' FFS she is not a piece of meat. Just because they do it and might say worse doesn't make it acceptable! This is not and never will be acceptable. Would he be happy if someone was talking about the OP on this way? Or his mother/sister/daughter?!?!

@Seabreeze18

This is how men think! He was appreciating arse like he would a nice cup of coffee or a moist slice of chocolate cake. It’s actually very normal us women just don’t want to admit that our men think like this!! He hasn’t cheated. Get over it!

A woman isn’t a piece of cake or a cup of coffee though is she? She’s a human being trying to do her job with some sleazy dickhead objectifying her to his colleague.

Disrespectful and unprofessional. Yes, it would bother me.

Wouldn't marry him if I were you

Grim. He is looking at his female colleague as a piece of meat. Utterly disrespectful. I don't think I could be with a man who thinks it's ok to talk about women in that way.

Oh, for heaven's sake! You're still allowed to look and appreciate! Although probably foolish to put it in writing in today's climate of thought crime!

Is this the same lady as last time?

I can’t work out whether it’s a sort of peer pressure to have to ‘banter’...or they really are all just vile sexist pigs who think entirely with their dicks.

Miriam Margolyes said recently in an interview with Louis Theroux: "I don't care who you are, all men care about it having it off."

I tend to agree with her. I asked my best male friend his opinion on Miriam's comment and he said: "There's a lot of truth in it."

Typo correction: "all men care about is having it off."

Vom ! So gross actually sick !!

I don't know what to say except if it were me ide be wanting to vomit