Is this controlling behaviour

[consuelaBanan]

Last night I was watching a movie , around 11pm, something went wrong with WiFi and the movie stopped. I didn't think much of it, went to bed, DH initiated sex, we had sex, went to sleep.

Next day kids complained their cartoons don't work, DH said he turned the WiFi off last night.
I kept asking why he did that, he was brushing me off but later admitted that he wanted me to come to bed for sex, so he turned it off!!

I'm so angry, he thinks I'm overreacting. This is controlling surely??

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It feels a bit manipulative. Couldn't he just have asked you?

Who the fuck does he think he is? Your father? Of course it's controlling. It's also manipulative and creepy.

I wouldn't necessarily say controling, but very underhand yes.

Jesus Christ, that’s really unsettling. I’m not surprised you’re furious...

Yeah that's really not OK! I'm not sure it's controlling as such, but it's disgustingly manipulative. Couldn't he just have asked?! What if you'd come to bed but hadn't felt like sex?

Turns out he con control the telly from his phone! And he has done this before! I'm bloody furious

That is absolutely disgusting.
I would change the wifi password until he can assure me he wont abuse my trust again. So horrible.

Depends if you stay up watching TV to avoid him /sex...
Maybe he thought he was being sneaky with the best of intentions.. Or being a twat. Only you will know.

Depends if you stay up watching TV to avoid him /sex...

Even if she does that's no excuse, she has a right to avoid sex if she wants to.

I've turned the WiFi/the TV/the laptop off on DH before but only ever with his knowledge and as part of "pay attention to meeeeeee!" playing around when I know he's in a mood open to that sort of joking around (e.g., during a work Zoom meeting isn't okay but when he's clarting about on the Xbox on an evening is). He does the same to me.

Doing it without your knowledge and claiming its down to a problem with the WiFi/TV when he knows full well it's down to him is wrong, he's lying to you and acting in an underhand way in order to get you to bed so he can try it on. I'd be having a serious conversation with him about trust and how easily trust can be lost.

Less crass than fancy a shag pet? ...

Wow. He rates himself pretty low if he thinks you need nothing to do in order to acquiesce to sex OR he is narked about you preferimg the tele over him and yes he behaved manipulatively.

That's disturbing.

Don't know whether it's controlling or not, but it's certainly pretty shitty behaviour.

That's borderline abusive

It's a fine example of male entitlement. His needs above yours.