Phone calls

[thegreenfish]

OH is a farmer. It's a very busy time for him and his staff this time of the year for around 2 months.

I hardly see him. I understand he's busy and let him get on with it. I have no problem with this.

But this really annoys me. When he does pop in to see me (and he states he is doing this as if he is doing me a favour) on my day off for 5 mins, he interrupts what I'm doing, we start to have a chat, his phone rings and he immediately answers it. I'm left waiting to resume the conversation. Sometimes I just get up and leave and carry on with what I was doing. Honestly, I'd rather he didn't come in.

AIBU to think if he's going to bother coming into the house for 5 mins to see me / the kids, he can choose not to answer his phone. Otherwise, what's the point? 95% of the time, someone rings him. He's busy, I get it. I've actually told him it's better if he doesn't come in, then he accuses me of stopping him coming into his own house.

Other times of the year at meal times for example, he won't answer the phone but will leave it ringing really loudly so completely interrupting us anyway. He says he doesn't want to put it on silent because he forgets to take it off and then misses calls.

Shameless bump for attention

My ex partner used to do something like this. He would be picked up by his friend to play football once a week. I would usually be watching a boxset while he was getting ready. He would get ready, come into the room I was watching and expect me to pause it so I could talk to him (entertain him) before his lift arrived. Always seemed like he didn't actually want to spend time with me, I was just filling a gap.

Your DH seems to be doing this. Coming in to grant you with his presence because he's a little bored and will only talk to you until something more important/better beckons him.

What I would do is just carry on with exactly what you were doing. I wouldn't ignore him but wouldn't drop everything because he's suddenly there for 5 mins.

I agree he could ignore his phone for 5 minutes, unless he really is expecting something urgent.

Now there are 2 kinds of people, those who can blissfully ignore a ringing phone, and those who can't and get all flustered about it. If you are not both in the same category, you will always disagree on that one!

I am always baffled how a ringing phone put some people on edge - when it has nothing to do with them.

I think with the ringing phone it's actually that he can't ignore it. It distracts him and he's waiting for the voicemail to be left. So I've never got his attention even then.

And yes, I get you about the feeling like you're just there to be available to entertain them when nobody else wants them but you are expected to drop everything when they want you to.

I think with the ringing phone it's actually that he can't ignore it. It distracts him and he's waiting for the voicemail to be left. So I've never got his attention even then.

And yes, I get you about the feeling like you're just there to be available to entertain them when nobody else wants them but you are expected to drop everything when they want you to.