Sleazy bosses in the workplace

[Beyondajokenow]

Not an AIBU really so I am posting for traffic.
I just need to rant. I’m sick of working for men that oggle women that work for them, discuss what they think they’d be like sexually, what their tits might look like etc.
I went for a meal last week with colleagues and my ‘big boss’ who I was meeting for the first time. He very obviously looked me up and down and wouldn’t stop doing this. There was not even an attempt to be discrete. It turned my stomach. He then went on to tell my line manager after I had left that he’s disappointed because he thought he was ‘in’ and ‘making headway’ with me and that he was annoyed that my line manager and others were there because he fancied me. This has left me seething to say the very least. He spoke to me briefly about my role, how it’s going, family life and that’s absolutely where it stopped.
How can this be acceptable that someone in such a senior position can discuss me in that way with absolutely NO hint of any desire from me AT ALL. I can’t be clear enough about that.
I honestly do feel violated by those words. I take my job seriously and I’m doing well but there’s absolutely zero mention of that and instead I get undressed by his eyes and discussed in a sexual way. It’s made me not want to work there anymore but this job is huge for me and has allowed me to earn more money which I do need. What should I do? Has anyone experienced this?

The only realistic answer is to look for another job. It's not fair and it's not right but it's realistic.

Your immediate boss must have enjoyed making you feel uncomfortable if he told you all this stuff so he's an arse too.

If it's any consolation, I have never witnessed behaviour like this in the workplace. I've witnessed loads and loads of sexism but it's of the much less blatant variety. The sort where it's assumed that a woman will make the coffee, or people ignoring what you say in a meeting only to be really impressed when a man repeats it. That sort of thing is easier to deal with, albeit still unacceptable.

Grim. Id leave

It’s just made me see the whole job differently and I hate that. I was so excited because the people there seemed so passionate about what we deliver etc
But I have lost respect for the bosses because I just see it as such weak, pathetic behaviour.
I have a daughter and I would hate her to be spoken about this way and feel she has to put up with that. I know I should leave it’s just so hard to accept that.
I work in a male dominated industry and it’s very much a chest puffing billy big bollocks attitude and it makes me sick. I’m losing my love for the job because of the type of people I’m forced to encounter.

What sort of company is this?

Is there an HR department this can be reported to?

It's behaviour intended to degrade and humiliate you. Totally unacceptable.

@hoohaaa I don’t want to say anything too outing but it’s a competitive environment and it seems to draw in a lot of narcissists unfortunately.

What a bunch of Neanderthals, I’m sorry this happened to you.

It’s absolutely ridiculous that in this day and age women’s careers will be limited because they don’t play along with the slimy old turds at the top of the food chain.

There is a HR department but this guy is so senior and I just know he would be fine because he is good at what he does. There seems to be such an injustice in the work place between the powerful bosses and women.

Yes, it's enraging.

Is it recruitment OP?

@TheWitchwithNoName it’s not but similar environment

So your line manager shared that conversation with you and "the big boss" was annoyed at his direct reports being presence ?

present

Yeah so basically after the meal I had a taxi booked and the big boss said he’d wait with me and my line manager and other boss stayed with me as well and waited for me to get in there taxi, and the big boss said to my line manager (in a ‘banter’ sort of way I imagine) that he was annoyed they waited as well cus he reckoned he could’ve been in.
It’s just repulsive and totally ridiculous considering I actually avoided conversation with him as much as I could because he gave me the creeps.

Is it accountancy? - generally full of sleazy men who,quite frankly see women as assets to be built up on the balance sheet. Been the same at every firm I’ve worked for - it’s not helped by a large raft of enabling women who seem to actually encourage the behaviour in order to progress their career/bag themselves a rich husband. I’ve actually seen a partner unzipping a colleagues jump suit, I had one partner wheel his chair back and very obviously look me up and down whilst discussing a client, One partner asking me to kneel by his desk, another partner insist women wore skirts, women were told to wear make up as part of the induction process, one firm I worked for hit the headlines by insisting receptionists wore heels. It’s disgusting, I spent most of my days kicking men in the balls in my mind. The new graduate intake time was like fucking (literally) hunting season for the sleazebags. Forget HR, they are there to act as gatekeepers and protectors for the firm.

I’m leaving the “profession”. I’ve found out it’s the only way - some professions have very suspect professional standards

The common thread isn’t accountancy or recruitment, it’s men.