To want the bigger house in the less than perfect location

[Woodlandwalks]

We put our house on the market specifically for a house that came up in exactly the village we want to be in. It's where we used to live when we were renting and loved it but as first time buyers, we couldn't afford to stay there. The house is very run down (hence we can afford it) and would need completly updatng and we don't have a lot of money to play with so it would take a long time to get it how we wanted but certainly liveable.
We put an offer in Saturday which, long story short, we now think was accepted but we never actually heard back to confirm this though we've now seen the house is listed as sold STC on Rightmove (we offered what they asked for after a bit of negotiation but then as they were going to confirm, we never heard from them again so have had all weekend thinking they're biding their time before they accept.) Because of this, we started reviewing our options again and have come back to a much larger property we also looked at in a perfectly lovely area but not the perfect location for us (aesthetically speaking, practically minimal difference for work etc.)
We went and saw it a few weeks ago before we had sold to keep options open but dismissed it because it was not in the dream location.
But after the anti-climax of not knowing what happened on Saturday (the agent said he'd call right back with confirmation that we'd bought it and then nothing), we have thought about it again and it really could be a very nice home and it is a lot bigger and it needs less work doing to it immediately which would be easier as we have a young baby.

My husband thinks we should buy the smaller house but now I'm really not convinced. It's end of terrace Vs detached, only marginally bigger than our current property with a smaller living room and whilst both only have 1 toilet there's scope to easily put in 2 more in the existing bigger property where we would have to actually extend before we could put in another in the summer house. My husband keeps saying Location Location Location which I do get but we're only on baby number 1 and would like another child one day and as lovely as the villiage is, we'll spend most time actually inside the house. AIBU to want the bigger house?

Bigger house, definitely. It might be the right location, but if the house isn't right, it won't work.

I grew up in houses that needed doing up. My dad was a builder, and unless your DH has experience in doing houses up, or serious DIY experience, he'll have massively underestimated how much will need to be done.

And that's before you try to get people in to do stuff. And I wouldn't be doing a house up around a baby, either.

Btw, we are coming to the end of our house renovation. We moved in with my mum up the road whilst it was completed. It was meant to take 3-4 months. It took 11 months before we were back in, another 3-4 months of builders traipsing through, and infact, we still have builders in today sorting snagging lists. We have been left with a huge mud pit of a garden, which will be renovated in September. The whole thing cost way way more than the quotations, took 3-4 times as long, and this was whilst we were living at my mum's and not having to contend with renting. The whole job was handled by a design/build company, so it wasn't as though we had to personally do all the work. My youngest was two when we started, and I actually felt like I missed out on a year of her life, as I was so busy with the build. In retrospect I wish that we'd waited until she had started school. We've previously 'renovated' houses before by ourselves (decorative work such as replacing kitchens/bathrooms/laying new wooden floors/tiling etc), which we managed with a toddler, but the house was in a good liveable condition and required no major structural work. It was still stressful getting it down whilst looking after a toddler. I just don't think that the timing is right to renovate when you have very young children. It's much tougher than you would think. I would hold off on the smaller house that needs work. In a few years you'll probably have more time and money and something else will likely come up in a few years in your dream village. Go for the biggest house requiring the least possible amount of work in a reasonable area.

Also, just to say that I think that it's even worse that your husband is the one so keen on renovating and doing the work. This means that he will be sat there, radio on, cup of tea in hand happily doing the DIY, whilst you most likely are stuck with a toddler without a break.

@Worstemailever

This OP, is the hard reality.
It will take years and years longer to renovate and as stated above YOU will rare those children alone as your husband slowly renovates that house alone over the next 10 years.

Not a chance would I do it.

Rear!

The main thing you can’t change about a house is it’s location and garden size. Which after the lockdown will always be my 2 most important things when looking

I have renovated a number of houses... four or five properties before I had children (and am the daughter of a builder). Then I took another 'project' house with a 1 year old. It was much, much harder, horrible in fact. I have just done another though, but very lucky with builders, timings etc. and a cheap rental nearby. However, the toll it takes on you and your family cannot be underestimated, the stress of small children and a dangerous building site is horrible. If after all that you still don't have enough room you may well regret it. My parents renovated lots of houses too but paused for the first 15 years of my life which was very sensible (and had a practical, large house with big garden for that period too).

The thing about location is people can be swept away by it without thinking about the day to day stuff you want but also thinking about the future and how it will look with 2 children who are school aged, and then teenagers.

I have lived in the smaller house for a catchment for an outstanding primary school. But then we saw sense when it came to upsizing as what we could afford on the same estate was a tiny 4 bed, what we could afford 2 mile down the road was a detached much larger 4 bed.

Go for the house that will give you the most, the detached means you won't have neighbours banging on the wall when your child cries (recent MN thread) less work to make it yours means more time as a family too. Think about how much time renovation will take up. How much DIY has your husband done before? Do you have the tools and equipment to do the DIY?