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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to thInk there's a high chance I am in fact Mr Bean?

22 replies

Sheeshisthatthetime · 12/07/2020 09:06

Too many incidences over the years but this one I think is definitive proof.

Last night my daughter had a friend stay for a sleepover. Walking past their den, something snapped under foot. It was her friend's cat-ear headband that she'd only got yesterday. She was very proud of it. I was of course mortified and promised to buy her a new one, but said I'd try to glue the ear back on anyway (doubtful it would work, but still).

It was late, I was tired, but scrambled around and managed to find a tiny tube of super glue.

After squeezing headband together with the diamante cat ear for some time and hoping for the best, l let go- only to find to my horror that my left thumb and forefinger were glued tightly together. Then with a deeper horror, that the headband was firmly wedged between them.

The ear hadn't stuck.

Cue heavy sweating and acting like an incompetent twat (still) - after much washing up liquid, it still wasn't going anywhere .

Had to shout for dd to google what to do (flashes of A&E going through my mind, hoping I wouldn't see anyone I knew). Heavily sweating at this point and making mumbling sounds.

Google said acetone- so I grabbed the nail varnish remover, asked dd to get a bowl.

By the time she came back.... the bottle was going nowhere. Glued firmly to my right palm. Cue cry laughing (me) and two baffled girls looking a bit insecure at having this clown at the helm.

Poured nail varnish remover into tiny bowl. No way my finger/thumb was getting anywhere near the surface with a metal headband clamped between them. Tried a bigger bowl. No good. A plate. Very difficult. Bearing in mind my right hand was out of bounds being attached to a large plastic bottle, DD had to try her best to help.

To sum up, it took about 20 minutes for one finger to be free. The rest eventually came apart.

I woke up this morning pleased to not be an Edward scissorhands knock off, but more concerned than ever that I am in fact Mr Bean!

OP posts:
seaduck · 12/07/2020 09:16

Grin This has properly given me the giggles.

Thingsdogetbetter · 12/07/2020 09:24

Brilliantly written fiasco description! Grin

I am now longer allowed near glue, super or otherwise. Or to open parcels or sqeezy bottles. Or near scissor - seemingly cutting labels off new clothes while wearing them is not a good plan after all.

I'm begging dh to pad the low door frame in the understairs cupboard. And the end of the knee height bed. He says he doesn't want to toddler proof a house for a 52 year old and I'll just have to learn to be aware of my surroundings.

WitchDancer · 12/07/2020 09:26

😂

LadySpratt · 12/07/2020 09:35

Sorry you’ve had such a time, but it’s a very funny read. I’ll do a face palm for you considering you had your hands full. 🤣

Emeraldshamrock · 12/07/2020 09:39

Very funny. I hear you think I am the real life Frank Spencer at times, my clumsy personal disasters. My parent's loved the show so much they named me after Frank Spencer's daughter I think it sealed the deal. some mother do ave em.

Emeraldshamrock · 12/07/2020 09:42

Missing full stops above... meant I think.

Sheeshisthatthetime · 12/07/2020 09:43

Obstruction-free face palm gratefully received @LadySpratt 😁

@Thingsdogetbetter- we are definitely of the same ilk!

Pleased to have provided a laugh- I'm relieved that I can also laugh this morning 😆

OP posts:
Sheeshisthatthetime · 12/07/2020 09:49

@Emeraldshamrock- that's what I call a self fulfilling prophecy 😆

OP posts:
DCIHoops · 12/07/2020 09:59

@Emeraldshamrock

Very funny. I hear you think I am the real life Frank Spencer at times, my clumsy personal disasters. My parent's loved the show so much they named me after Frank Spencer's daughter I think it sealed the deal. some mother do ave em.
Jessica, please tell me that they sang ‘there was a man who had a cat’ lullaby to you as well
Emeraldshamrock · 12/07/2020 10:12

They often said my name in Franks voice J-e-s-s-i-ccccc-a.

Ukholidaysaregreat · 12/07/2020 10:15

Hope you and your hands are O.K. now!

Sheeshisthatthetime · 12/07/2020 10:17

They often said my name in Franks voice J-e-s-s-i-ccccc-a 🤣

OP posts:
Sheeshisthatthetime · 12/07/2020 10:20

Thank you @ukholidaysaregreat - I have some callouses which I think are dried glue, which I keep trying to pick.. it's not ideal but glad I didn't have a reaction as i do have sensitive skin 😏

OP posts:
Smallsteps88 · 12/07/2020 10:24

I glued myself to the kitchen floor once. And didn’t realise at that point that combing superglue and microfibre cloth (with acetone on it) would result in burning and smoke. I do now.

Smallsteps88 · 12/07/2020 10:26

combining

thisisexhausting · 12/07/2020 10:27

That's hilarious! Sorry 😂

WishIcouldrelax · 12/07/2020 10:27

Love this OP

I remember once being worried I was Frank Spencer and instead of reassuring me I wasn't, my boyfriend at the time said "well, at least Frank always had Betty"

I still feel like this now, I'm a bloody liability but I don't know how not to be! 🙈

GinDrinker00 · 12/07/2020 10:28

Thanks for the laugh. Grin

lockdownalli · 12/07/2020 10:31

I am dyspraxic. An old flat mate told me that living with me was "Like living with Mr. Blobby" Grin

ShipshapeShore · 12/07/2020 10:36

My DH calls me Miranda. I'll never forget the time I was stood on the pavement with a grumpy crying toddler and a bag of split compost while watching my bag of carrots sail 20 feet in the air to land in the road Grin

SpacePug · 12/07/2020 10:42

I always wondered what happens if you superglue yourself! Could be worse, could have been an American pie 2 situation

Emeraldshamrock · 12/07/2020 10:44

@lockdownalli Me too. My DD is in the 0.25 coordination with dyspraxia.
Every year without fail DD falls into the Christmas tree. 😂
We are like little bulls going about.

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