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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Thoughts on reselling baby gifts??

9 replies

newmum332 · 10/07/2020 15:50

A friend has messaged me today and she is extremely annoyed with another mutual friend of ours.

Mutual friend had DD 2 years ago, at the time friend had purchased gifts when DD was born, a number of outfits etc. The friend that has messaged me is now expecting DD in 8 weeks time.

Mutual friend has posted a load of her DD’s old clothes online to sell, and has messaged other friend to say she’s selling baby clothes if she’s interested in any. Friend has noticed that 2 of the outfits she bought are posted as brand new with tags, meaning they were never used.

Firstly she is annoyed that the gifts she had bought have not been used, secondly she is also now annoyed that mutual friend is now trying to sell back her gift to her. (Her words not mine).

I’m on the fence a bit, I can see where she is coming from as it does seem like a bit of a waste of money to buy gifts that aren’t used but then it’s not really anything to do with you once you’ve handed the gift over what happens to it next. I don’t think mutual friend has meant anything by it but I can understand why other friend is annoyed about the mutual friend suggesting she might want to buy some of the unused clothes! She wants to confront mutual friend but I don’t really see what this will achieve. Just to point out both friends aren’t short of money and friend is also annoyed mutual friend is trying to make money out of the unused clothes when we do have other friends that could probably do with the clothes for free (I do get this part a bit more as I’d try to gift as much as I can if I know it will be of use to someone else, but again it’s not really anyone else’s business what our other friend chooses to do, I think she’s just thrown this in on top of the other reasons she is annoyed).

Is my friend being unreasonable for being annoyed by this or do you think she has the right to be annoyed. I wanted to seek some other opinions before I offer her any advice as I can see both sides.

OP posts:
Lockdownseperation · 10/07/2020 15:53

It was probably insensitive to offer to sell them to friend but for whatever reason, not being organised or not wanting a young baby in outfits, the gifts were not used. Better to sell them on than bin them?

mrsed1987 · 10/07/2020 15:53

I'd be annoyed if my friend tried to sell a gift back to me, but I wouldn't be annoyed at them selling a gift, what else would they do with it, if they hadn't used it?

AryaStarkWolf · 10/07/2020 15:55

I mean, I don't think I'd personally sell off clothes like that if a close friend was due a baby soon and could use them unless I did really need the money. However she's not doing anything wrong and your friend has no right whatsoever to confront her about anything

NameChange84 · 10/07/2020 15:57

It seems a bit emotionally tone deaf.

Emeraldshamrock · 10/07/2020 15:58

Selling friend probably has no memory of who gave what outfit as a gift. If she was selling anyway and expecting friend asked to buy then they're part of the sale bundle.

britbo · 10/07/2020 15:59

She probably didn't even realise (or has forgotten) that those outfits were gifted by your friend. I don't think she's purposely doing anything wrong, but I do get why your friend is annoyed. I've seen my sister in law sell things that we'd gifted her and her kids over the years and as much as it is irritating, I don't take it personally. If she has no use for them then why not make a little £££. I'm planning on selling quite a lot of my baby girl's clothes and stuff when I have no use for them. Love selling bits and buying second hand stuff, such a good way to recycle clothes!

userabcname · 10/07/2020 16:03

Well in defence of the seller, we had absolutely tons of clothes still with tags on that ds1 never wore because he grew so quickly. Plus I have no idea who bought what anymore. So she probably doesn't realise she's trying to sell your friend something that your friend originally bought. As for selling things she could give away - I mean, sure, that would be a nice thing to do, but she's not obligated to do that and lots of people sell baby things so I wouldn't judge somebody for it. I think your friend needs to let it go.

superram · 10/07/2020 16:08

It could also have been a duplicate and one was worn. Buying clothes for babies will always result in some being unworn as they mostly wear baby grows. I can see both sides but the person having the new baby will realise it’s no big deal once she has the baby and had many unworn clothes.

newmum332 · 10/07/2020 16:08

Thanks all! Everyone has confirmed my thinking, I think my friend has taken it a bit personally and nothing has be meant by it. Other friend probably has no idea now who gifted what. Always good to get a second opinion though in case I was completely missing something!!

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