How do we get our cat back?

[Idontbelieveit12]

I rescued a cat a few years ago from somewhere he was being mistreated. He is very much loved. However since our youngest child came along he started to stay out longer. I thought he was out hunting and being a bit wild but in the last few months when he came home he smelt scented like candles so I know he’s been going in somewhere. He’s now only coming home once a week. I’ve seen him hanging around a neighbours a lot. We saw them open their window for him a few weeks ago so my hubby went and knocked on the door and they denied all knowledge. Another neighbour has just told me that they are seeing him there every day. What can I do? If I try and keep him in when he comes home he gets cross.

@CazzaCat yep me too! It's almost like some people don't see them as family pets..

If you let him go where he likes, then you have to accept he likes to be elsewhere.

Your options are to keep him in long term, tempt him back and try to make him prefer your place, or let him roam where he likes.

I'd try the charm offensive I think. More tuna!

I had a similar experience with my cat. In the end, I had to shut him him for a few weeks and he soon forgot about the neighbors and they bought themselves a kitten, so everything worked out in the end.

There is no way I'd just shrug and say whatever.

Ask her if she wants to take over ownership and his meds cost x amount of pounds each month... And his prescribed food is y.. Suggest if she feeds him anything he will be ill and you will hold her responsible for the vet bill.

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My cat is like 6 dinners Sid. He’s got a route of visits that he does and always had done. Because everyone’s home in lockdown however it’s become a problem, he’s been fed so much he’s been sick a few times. I bought a collar from eBay with his name , our number and an ask to call before he’s fed. He’s still doing his visits but is home a lot more for food. We also bought him a fab new cat house for the garden so he can relax outside.

Technically it’s theft.

I’d ask her to stop, and tell her if she doesn’t you’ll report her for theft.

Also mention if she keeps doing it, you’ll transfer his chip into her address and she’ll be responsible for all vet costs etc.

Has anyone had any luck with Feliway plug ins? I’m wondering if we get one he might feel more chilled when at home. Obviously among the other things. Will definitely be keeping him in next time he comes home.

Neighbours years ago started feeding one of my lovely pedigree cats and he ballooned up and ended up being very very fat. He kept disappearing and they eventually sent us a letter saying they were moving soon and could they keep him?! I went mad and told them to get stuffed! Kept my cat in and fed him chicken every day and gave him lots of extra fuss and to this day he's never strayed again (touch wood).

Can't believe someone would just sack off their own pet as it was stressed out due to building work being done! Ridiculous and can't have been much part of the family in the first place

One of my cats did this as a kid. He started going to a neighbours house who initially was lovely and talked to us about him, but then started denying he was there. We did all the old tricks - he needs expensive food or he gets diarrhoea, he has expensive health conditions, he's registered to us, etc... she refused to stop letting him in.

The police got involved eventually but said they wouldn't do anything, and we should let Benny be wherever he wanted to be. My mum closed him in for a few days but he got very upset. For a while he visited her and us, randomly, which made it quite difficult to know how much he was eating... then he stopped coming home much, really, and seemed happy in her house. I was angry but a young teen, so there was little I could do! And my parents seemed to accept it eventually.

A couple of things. Firstly, is he microchipped? If not, or he's never been checked for one, then take him to the vet asap and get one.

Secondly, you can't force a cat to live with you if it doesn't want to. They have a mind of their own and will choose their own staff and living quarters! All you can do is try and persuade him which side his bread is buttered, so to speak.

We once had a cat that decided she didn't want to live with us any more, she adopted another human family, and in the end we agreed with the woman that the cat's welfare came first, so she took the cat over from us.

We used Feliway when we got our very nervous rescue cat and it worked well with her. She used to sit next to the plug in! We still have the Feliway spray which we use on Bonfire Night and when we have visitors etc.

We had a blanket from the foster lady which our cat used so we rubbed that on the furniture to make it smell more familiar which also seemed to help settle her.

I would not be happy if someone was tempting my cats away!!!
We have a catio as I cant bear the thought of ours getting lost, poisioned, knocked over, stolen...
The cats love it, plenty of enrichment and then free roam of house whenever they wish (Free to cone and go to catio too

Cazzacat what was I meant to do when he disappeared off the face of the earth for long periods of time? I went out calling him and nothing.
When he came back that time he looked fine and well cared for, I couldn't keep him locked in when he had been used to going outside for his whole life so how could I prevent it?

Cats roam and often (as this thread shows) go to other houses and get fed. He obviously took a liking to that house, like i said- the new baby unsettled him.
I'm glad he is happy as he clearly wasn't at my house with a baby screaming all the time.

Feliway is good.
I'd agree with making your home more pleasing. Pop a paper collar on and ask for 'no feeding, on special diet'
Cats can be very treat/food motivated. My NDN cats greet me like old friends (I give them Dreamies) but with my NDN knowledge. They aren't allowed in the house.

Feliways are great, worked really well for us. Also echoing pp's - catnip, treats, nice food - spoil him a bit (you might actually already be doing this, apologies if so!) and definitely put the "dont feed me" collar on.

Cannot understand people who just shrug their shoulders and say "oh well the cat prefers the neighbour so see ya"

Just wait for him to come back and then keep him indoors for about two weeks. If he stills wanders off then unfortunately there’s not much else you can do.

And this is why you shouldn't let cats run free.

Bribery of the most blatant kind - prawns, salmon, tuna, the works - may soften his cold feline heart. And feliway.

@Leaannb cats aren't indoor animals? Of course some are but in the main, you don't keep cats inside

It’s a difficult one , especially if the neighbour is feeding him , all you can really do is try and make your family more appealing and it sounds like a pallet load of tuna might do the trick . It does make you wonder why people don’t just get their own pet rather than trying to hijack someone else’s , it’s not like there is a shortage of cats .