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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be angry that known poorly children are at a party with the party mums knowledge and she doesnt share it

12 replies

LowFat · 27/09/2007 17:01

sorry the OP sounds awful, but I did'nt know how else to word it.

DD went to a party DC's party last week and some guest left early and DH was told because LB is poorly but did'nt want to miss the celebration. Okay 1 child not so bad.

I then find out when talking to SIL after party that older DN is also poorly with high temp and that SIL has known about 5 other children were also poorly with a bug going round. (we live m,iles away BTW)

Okay if SIL wants to have that party, but I would have preferred she let me know before we wents DD has her party this weekend and DS was really chesty and snotty today. Not saying he defo got it at DN's party but is likely.

What if DD gets it for her party - am just a bit cross, because when my two had and were suspected of having chicken pox we consulted with them all the time and stayed away when asked.

OP posts:

Scanner · 27/09/2007 17:04

unreasonable

they are children, this is normal

niceglasses · 27/09/2007 17:06

Sorry don't get the keep away from ill children bit (with caveats of lowered immunity) - you mix with children all the time and would never know if they are ill etc.

Original poster

LowFat · 27/09/2007 17:06

Why is it unreasonable to be told there is a bug going round, several of my friends DC's have it and are coming to the party - just thought I would let you know in case you wanted to avoid it?

According to SIL my DN had a temperature of 105 after the party FGoodnessS!

OP posts:

2shoes · 27/09/2007 17:07

understand your anger. but if you kept dc's awoay everytime they were poorly they would never go out

bubblagirl · 27/09/2007 17:09

kids get colds all the time and cannot catch a cold from another child that would just be the weather

if your ds was slightly unwell and really really wanted to go to a party would you not take him knowing he would be heart broken if didn't go but also knowing it would take his mind off feeling slightly unwell better than being at home being miserable because he wanted to go

i know what i would do i would take my ds on the understanding if he felt sick or worse we would leave kids are better being distracted when ill but colds are not catching and chickeb pox is better had when younger anyway and will get them eventually anyway

niceglasses · 27/09/2007 17:09

Well for instance - there is a very virulent bug going round schl at mo where all 3 of mine go. Teachers off, parents getting it , usual September stuff. Would it be reasonable to keep my kids off school? They are bound to get it. Its just not an option.

Original poster

LowFat · 27/09/2007 17:09

Only cross because DD has her b'day party this weekend and I want her to be well to enjoy it (boucny castle, soft play and general noise and activity, and not to be fretting over her brother while I am supposed to be seeing to 20 other children.

Any other time, I agree it would be unreasonable!

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 27/09/2007 17:16

there is no saying though that your dd was not already coming down with cold i understand you wanted your daughter to be healthy for her party but even if she didn't go to the other party she could of still come down with cold its the weather its chopping and changing and kids have at least 9-10 colds a yr

bubblagirl · 27/09/2007 17:17

i hope she still has good time though if your still going ahead with party now your dd not feeling to well

MaryBleedinPoppins · 27/09/2007 17:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cappuccino · 27/09/2007 17:22

lol at "known poorly children" like "known terrorists"

if you were to enforce this everyone would have to put 'There may be ill children at this party' at the bottom of all their invites

if you get a room full of kids there are always a couple of em brewing something up

LizP · 27/09/2007 17:27

Children do catch colds from each other - its a virus. Getting very cold might lower the immune system and make you more likely to catch it, but it isn't the getting cold that causes the cold symptoms. I think a cold with a fever is different to one that is just sneezing from the point of view of going out etc - I wouldn't send my to school if they were running a temperature but would if it was just sniffles. Likewise I wouldn't normally send them to a party with a cold with fever, but would if they were sneezing alone. In a group of friends / a class at school since everyone is together all the time it might make sense for the parents to agree to go ahead anyway but I think they should have told other guests so they had the choice not to go. I don't think YABU to expect to have been told.

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