Parental exposure

[feelingsofshame]

I've been reflecting on something that happened when I was a child and it just makes me feel uneasy. I would really appreciate some perspective and opinions.
It seems really silly and I'm sure I'm being unreasonable to even give it a second thought.
I had a happy settled family life and was well cared for, I have always adored my dad so feel incredibly guilty for even thinking this is weird.
My dad would always stop to say morning on his way to the bathroom when he got up, my bedroom door was always open and he'd just pop his head in and say morning and sometimes have a quick chat. All good. The thing is, he would often have an erection which was clearly exposed as he'd be wearing nothing or just an open dressing gown. He must have known I could see it. It always made me feel uncomfortable but I just tried to ignore it.
So I guess my question is AIBU to feel so uncomfortable about this? He is my world and never gave me any other reason to feel uncomfortable. I always put it down to him being embarrassed and just pretending it wasn't there hoping I wouldn't notice.
God it sounds ridiculous doesn't it!

Bumping

Yeah, that's inappropriate. Most men get a morning wood, but have the decency to cover it or wait until it's gone before getting up.

That was kinda my thinking, thank you for commenting.

DH and I often wander round naked when we’ve just got up or at shower time /bedtime. DS is now 9. We encourage body positivity.
However. DH always waits until his morning wood has vanished unless he’s desperate for a pee in which case he just scoots to the bathroom and back quickly.

I’d say it’s weird.

Just to add, I saw my parents naked plenty of times when I was growing up and I never saw my father with an erection.

That’s incredibly inappropriate. It’s totally normal for men to wake up like that, not normal to stand with it visible and chat to your child.

I was always so embarrassed as a child and still find myself feeling uncomfortable about it many years on. Need to park it really

Bumping as I'd really appreciate a range of perspectives

If that's the only thing that happened, I don't think it's an issue. It might not be culturally normal, but that doesn't make it wrong.

If he knew you were uncomfortable with it and still did it, or if it was part of a pattern of seemingly small things, then that would be different.

We’re a bit of a naked house but stiffies in front of the children are not on.

Only you can know if there was anything sinister behind this, but it sounds like it was inappropriate and lacking in boundaries rather than a full on abusive situation. I’m not explaining myself well, but I mean if he never said sexual stuff to you or did anything else then it was likely not sinister.

As said by others, it sounds like it may not have been sinister - but it’s ok for you to have felt, and to still feel, bothered by it.

Bumping as I'd really appreciate a range of perspectives

I really don't think you are going to find anyone who thinks this is OK???

Same as above: naked in front of kids- yes. Boner- absolutely not!

I dont know how old you are, OP, but I think in the sixties and seventies it was considered healthy to "let it all hang out" and allow children to see their parents naked, etc. Maybe your Dad subscribed to the Health and Efficiency school of thought and believed this would be helpful to demystify the male body for you. In the absence of any other inappropriate behaviour, I'd say this was just a misguided attempt at helping you grow up with some awareness of male bodies.

Nudity is fine.

That is disgusting.

OP, how old were you and when did it stop?

The only thing I can imagine was he thought you were too young to notice/ care?

However, agree it's not appropriate and not surprised you are uncomfortable about it.

I DO think it's possible for it to be innocent/ stupid/ oblivious on his part and still validly uncomfortable and disturbing for you. It doesn't need to be that you are either silly for feeling uncomfy or he consciously did something wrong....

Thank you all, that has actually been really helpful. I can't really remember how old but probably somewhere between the ages of 6 and 13, it would have been 80s/90s. I know it's not great but the considered responses do give a balanced and calm perspective. Thank you