To be anxious about my new baby's health

[nervousnellyisnervous]

Have a 7 week old, who so far has been a lovely baby. She's been a bit fussy but now sleeps through the night, breastfeeds feeds well, you put her down and she sits and amuses herself for the most part.

I'm freaking out a bit because my NCT friends say sleeping through is unheard of for a newborn, and she hardly ever cries. She's a chilled little baby.

I'm anxious because there is no one available who will actually see us in person, no health visitors will come, and the doctor isn't doing in person appointments. I know its probably an unreasonable fear, but I'm scared something is wrong.

AIBU? Is this normal for a 7 week old?

Both of mine slept through (11pm - 5/6am) by 7 weeks, and both were EBF. They are in their 20's now and the picture of health. So long as she is gaining well you have nothing to worry about.

My dd was the same. Don't worry, enjoy it!!! 😃

@Aquamarine1029 thats another thing, my scales aren't accurate, every time I jump on them with her the readings go up and down. The doctor won't let me in the surgery to use the scales, and the children's centres aren't open. Her 8 week jabs are now at 10 weeks due to capacity problems at the doctors surgery, so its a two week wait now to weigh her.

Honestly its worrying me having such little access to even be reassured. She sleeps, but I don't.

Probably more a (mental) health issue with me most likely 😂

Health visitor should be available for a weight now at least? Keep phoning them

You’re worried because your baby is happy, feeds well and sleeps well? I really really really don’t think you need to see anyone 😬 just be grateful!!!

@Napqueen1234 - for context went through a lot to have this baby, maybe I think its too good to be true.

Is she smiling and starting to take notice of things

Contact your health visiting service and explain how you are feeling. There should be support for you if they know you need it.

I had major post natal anxiety. I would stay awake all night to make sure DS was still breathing and only let myself sleep when DH got up with him. I also had PND. Please speak to your health visitor/GP to get some help.

DS slept 11-7 from 7 weeks and is still going strong with that at 7 months. It definitely can happen.

My 2nd been sleeping through from 6 weeks too. We haven't seen a health visitor for weight checks either though she did get her check and jags at 8 weeks. Does she seem to be going up in sizes with her sleepsuits, and is she doing plenty of wet and dry nappies? I'm just going by that, though this is my second so I think I'm finding it easier as I have a comparison with her big sister.

I worried loads with my first and ended up with pnd, it's one of the things health visitor normally checks so give your GP a call if you are concerned about how you are feeling.

@nervousnellyisnervous sorry if that sounded harsh it’s just envy as I have a 6 month old who still wakes multiple times! Although she was a dream until the 4 month regression so maybe that’s coming...on a serious note enjoy your baby she sounds like a dream and also sounds like you deserve it after the struggle 💕

I think that last post brings it all into context. I know a woman who had a much wished-for baby after a number of tragic losses and she was very anxious with everything (and, tbh, and not surprisingly, remains an anxious mum).

Sometimes you do get lucky with the sleeping - she'll have phases of waking as well. But 'amusing herself' is fine - everything is totally amazing to a newborn, they don't need tonnes of stimulation all the time, just being able to take things in around them is pretty fascinating.

My lo is sleeping through and has done since 6 weeks. My eldest 2 were horrendous sleepers. Some babies are just good sleepers. Btw, for my baby's jabs, we were literally ushered in , jabbed and out. No weighing or anything she's five months now and hasn't been weighed since 4 weeks. She's putting on weight so I'm not worrying

My first slept through from 6 weeks and was the easiest baby. Then I had my second who didn’t sleep through until he was 3.

It sounds like she is doing fine just keep doing what you are doing and enjoy your lovely baby. It might be better to not discuss sleep with other mums, it usually makes someone feel like they are doing something wrong,

Both mine were sleeping through at 8 weeks and 6 weeks respectively. I don’t think my nct group have quite forgiven me it’s unusual but not unheard of and I really wouldn’t worry about it if she’s gaining weight well. She will let you know if she’s hungry. Just enjoy it!

My son slept through from 4 weeks. When I say overnight it was from around 11pm-5/6am which was good enough for me. I had some very jealous friends and he was also a very chilled baby. He fed well otherwise and happy and content so no problem. He’s a very healthy 9 year old. It doesn’t last forever. Sometimes he takes forever to go sleep now 🤣

Dd was a little later at sleeping through, maybe around 9 weeks. She wasn’t as chilled as DS. No babies are the same!

@isadoradancing123 she is flashing little smiles and turning to follow sounds, tracks movements etc. I'm over thinking it I guess. New mum as well so probably worry about more than I should. Just a bit afraid its all going to be ripped out from under me.

Breathe. Just breathe. And enjoy these first few precious months.

You are right to worry. Sleeping loads can often be a sign of jaundice - even if it’s mild it can knock the baby for six. How is she developing? If you think something’s wrong just take her directly to A&E and they can make referrals to pediatrics.

💐 sounds a happy baby
Is she hitting her milestones?
Your NCT mums might be just jealous. I would be ☺️☺️☺️

However if you are so anxious, could you get a private / virtual appointment?
Do you have anyone in your neighbourhood who you trust for an independent advice? 💐

It’s okay to be anxious. She is your first 🥰

You mentioned your own mental health, you maybe able to self refer to IApTS where you are. It's also worth asking if you need your thyroid function checking as it can go a bit wonky post partum.
Help for new mums is so scant at the best of times, it must be incredibly tough.
Your baby sounds a delight, my first was a happy, tear free little poppet too. (but loved to wake frequently for the first couple of years.)

@Napqueen1234 don't worry, I know how ridiculous I sound. My BH thinks the same 😂

I literally sit in her room expressing milk at 2am while she sleeps and check her breathing.

On another note, should I be trying to dream feed her? Should a newborn even go that long without milk?

Aww, congratulations on your lovely baby.
Mine slept through from 6 weeks, breast fed. And were calm and placid.
How lucky I was, how lucky you are too.

YA never BU to get anxious about a baby, it is just the way it is. Especially if it took a lot to get there, that heightens things.

In terms of weight/growing - before scales people would know by sight and by clothes getting tighter etc. Has your baby grown thru clothes size yet?

Also being alert, happy, hearing noises - all will help.

You can phone the HV for a chat if worried?

Parenting rule 1 - don't wake a sleeping baby!
Especially not to feed, not at this stage unless terribly underweight.
Baby will be fine without milk during the night if she's sleeping through naturally.