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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think daughter should wear face mask at job in takeaway restaurant.

69 replies

Immy76 · 04/07/2020 22:12

My daughter (17) has just returned to her part-time job today (4th July) in a pizza takeaway restaurant. She’s asthmatic so stopped working there during lockdown. When I picked her up tonight I asked if she had worn her face mask and she said no! She is serving customers at an open hatch and in the same inside space as the chefs and delivery drivers - none of them are wearing masks. I am worried but my daughter thinks I’m making a big deal over nothing. I know it’s not legal requirement to wear a mask but seems sensible thing to do? AIBU?

OP posts:
Whichoneofyoudidthat · 05/07/2020 08:10

presumably her mother would know if her daughter’s condition were severe enough to render mask wearing a danger for her own daughter. The child has a mask, after all.

wanderings · 05/07/2020 08:13

@DisobedientHamster

She is old enough to decide that for herself.

Jesus wept, this mask shit has become the new social stick to beat others with.

Yep. It's becoming "If you're not muzzled in public, you're a murderer.".
EnlightenedOwl · 05/07/2020 08:15

@PurpleDaisies

It’s not compulsory. I wish people would stop making up their own rules for everyone to adhere to.
This is so true
EnlightenedOwl · 05/07/2020 08:16

@DisobedientHamster

She is old enough to decide that for herself.

Jesus wept, this mask shit has become the new social stick to beat others with.

Agreed
otterlielovely · 05/07/2020 08:30

Masks are horrible. I had to wear one in hospital the other day and I felt so nauseous and hot. I feel really sorry for people who have to wear them all day.

soloula · 05/07/2020 08:39

I'm asthmatic. I sat the other day sewing masks for myself and my family after the new Scotland guidelines. Was quite pleased with my efforts. Then I tried one on and had to take it off instantly as I couldn't breathe. And it wasn't a panicky claustrophobic thing. I just couldn't breathe. Had to use my inhaler after as I was wheezy. A quick Google and I saw that asthmatics are exempt if it causes breathing issues. My asthma is mild so I wasn't expecting any problems. I'm now worried as I'm torn between breathing problems when wearing a mask and judgement from others who assume if I don't that I'm a terrible person.

vanillandhoney · 05/07/2020 08:43

@Whichoneofyoudidthat

presumably her mother would know if her daughter’s condition were severe enough to render mask wearing a danger for her own daughter. The child has a mask, after all.
Yes, but it's still not her choice to make.

There's a difference between wearing a mask for an hour in Tesco and wearing one for 5-6 hours in a hot, busy, noisy takeaway. Whenever I've worked in food prep, the environment has been warm and unpleasant and I certainly wouldn't have wanted to do it with half my face covered by a chunk of fabric - it gets bloody hot in that kind of environment. Take asthma into account as well and it could be incredibly dangerous.

If she doesn't want to wear one, she shouldn't be made too. Wearing masks in takeaways is a choice - why are so many people keen to act as though it's the law and everyone who chooses not to wear one is awful?

853ax · 05/07/2020 08:51

Remind her wash hands or use sanatizer after each interaction with customers or other staff.
Avoid touching face.
As said many times above mask not recommended for asthmatic.

SomewhereEast · 05/07/2020 08:54

Are face shields an option for people with asthma?

SockYarn · 05/07/2020 09:11

I'm mildly asthmatic. I can't bear to wear a mask. I had to visit my GP on Friday and I was ready to rip the thing off my face after about 3 minutes. So hot and sticky, uncomfortable. Unbearably awful - I have no idea how surgeons cope with it.

Unfortunately I'm in Scotland and Saint Nicola has ordered that we all wear face coverings in shops as of Friday. I have ordered some of the clear plastic visors as I simply won't wear a mask.

SockYarn · 05/07/2020 09:14

torn between breathing problems when wearing a mask and judgement from others who assume if I don't that I'm a terrible person

This is what will happen. We saw how desperate people were to snitch on their neighbours and report people for "flouting" rules, most of which were made up. You shouldn't have to explain yourself to anyone if you're not wearing a mask but people will take the superior attitude and sneer at people who won't/don't.

I really don't like what Covid has turned our society into where everyone's so willing to tell everyone else what they should be doing.

midnightstar66 · 05/07/2020 09:31

I'm in Scotland and ordered some lightweight snoods from amazon that I can just pull up in the shop. I find it far less claustrophobic than a mask and given the weather has taken the typical school holiday turn for the worst it's not even too hot to wear outside.

lancashirelady · 05/07/2020 09:40

Visors should be worn by shop/serving staff. How on earth is somebody who lip reads meant to be able to understand someone wearing a mask. I have also found that people who wear masks are the ones that don't give a shit about social distancing in supermarkets.

Jean74 · 05/07/2020 09:52

Hi Immy

It’s such an anxious time coming out of lockdown isn’t it. I am asthmatic and so are my two teenage children. We have all been wearing masks whenever in enclosed spaces and public transport as per govt. advice.

It isn’t true as people are saying above that it is harmful or dangerous to asthmatics to wear masks, every person with asthma is different. You seem like a concerned parent and I’m sure will have read carefully all the guidance out there. Asthma UK currently says, “The governments of all UK nations are now recommending that people wear a face covering in enclosed spaces, where:

social distancing may not be possible
you may come into contact with people you don’t normally meet.
Examples of where this could happen are public transport and some shops. However, in England and Scotland it is now mandatory to wear a face covering on public transport.
If you’ve got asthma, you may or may not be able to wear a face mask or covering. It’s a good idea to try one out at home, or on a short walk around the block first. If it feels fine, then you can wear it, and it won’t harm you.”
My son works at MacDonalds part-time and he and all his colleagues are wearing face masks, if everyone is doing it maybe it normalises it a bit. He doesn’t have any breathing problems with the mask but obviously anyone who does can opt out.

I do think the whole mask issue is quite revealing about how people care for others - our family has chosen to wear masks in crowded places as we want to reduce chains of transmission. Other people wearing masks are helping protect us in return.

There’s a lot we don’t know about Covid-19 but we do know that 44,000 people have died from it in UK so far and tens of thousands of others have been left with long-term health problems. It’s totally reasonable to want to talk about wearing masks in this context! Wishing you and your family all the best x

ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble · 05/07/2020 11:21

I do think the whole mask issue is quite revealing about how people care for others - our family has chosen to wear masks in crowded places as we want to reduce chains of transmission.

Ah yes, you and your family are heroes.
Everyone else is a selfish, breathing murderer.

The narrative doesn't change , just the act of "heroism".

CarelessSquid07A · 05/07/2020 11:44

I have asthma and I must admit I had to wear a mask to the gp yesterday and i found it really hard work.

Whereas my hubby who is also asthmatic isnt bothered by it at all.

It's really individual.

vanillandhoney · 05/07/2020 11:54

I do think the whole mask issue is quite revealing about how people care for others - our family has chosen to wear masks in crowded places as we want to reduce chains of transmission. Other people wearing masks are helping protect us in return.

And? What do you want, a medal?

Wearing a mask doesn't make you superior. I have ASD and would meltdown in a mask. Others suffer with asthma. Some people have PTSD and can't have things over their mouth and nose. There are numerous medical conditions that mean people would struggle or even become unwell in a mask. Most of them are invisible too.

But don't let pesky things like disabilities, autism, PTSD or chronic health conditions ruin your little narrative of "everyone who doesn't wear a mask is a selfish murderer who doesn't care about anyone apart from themselves".

BananaPop2020 · 05/07/2020 12:20

@ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble 👍👍👍

Jean74 · 05/07/2020 12:25

I myself am asthmatic and so are my kids and we have been ok with wearing masks. As I said - of course anyone who has breathing difficulties should opt out of wearing one. Never said we were heroic or anyone was a murderer. Not judging anyone either, unlike many on here. Every individual is different and will have different circumstances and choices to make.

Whichoneofyoudidthat · 05/07/2020 12:25

What are you on about? I never suggested anyone HAD to wear anything. Should people if they can? For the greater good? You betcha. They won’t though because it’s unpleasant and uncomfortable and too hot. Boo hoo.

There is such pointless rhetoric on both sides. Muzzled? Selfish murderer? Please.

If it is impossible for you to wear a mask without breaking down, having some sort of episode, having an asthma attack, don’t. Who is asking you to? No one. But people like YOU rely on people like us, the mask wearers. Just like people who are unable to be vaccinated. GENUINELY unable. They rely on those of us who can, and do, and should.

recededpronunciation · 05/07/2020 12:39

My youngest and I are both asthmatic and cope fine with masks - just as well as I have to wear one for my job anyway. It’s worth giving them a go to see how you get in with them. None of my asthmatic colleagues have any trouble and we often work 12 hour shifts in masks or respirators. But I appreciate some people find them impossible to cope with.

Porcupineinwaiting · 05/07/2020 12:43

masks not recommended for asthmatic people

Whereas COVID is really good for them? Hmm

This whole "asthmatics can't wear masks" thing is such a pile of shit. Most of us manage just fine.

Lipz · 05/07/2020 13:00

According to Dr Fauci (SP) in the USA, whom I personally think speaks alot of truth and sense, he has said along with some others that it is now proven that masks protect the wearer.

I'd feel better if she wore one if she was my child. But if she won't then the concequences are on her.

My ds has asthma, he wasn't allowed on the bus without one, he needed to get to work so wore one the following day, he was actually OK, he got hot at times, and he also kept breathing normally which helped, I say normally because in his words, putting a mask over your nose and mouth feels like drowning and you breath faster making it difficult to breath.

We did think asthmatics couldn't wear one and checked with gp to see if he could get a letter etc but gp said it's fine to wear masks with asthma, we were convinced it was not a good idea. The only thing ds can't breath with is heavy material, he uses the disposable blue and white ones.

Working serving food and customers people should be wearing masks, I see pictures of pubs restaurants opened here since last week in Ireland and not one server is wearing one. It's just not worth it, people think they are invincible, my sil tested positive yesterday, she's been going around spouting that covid is a hoax and only fat sick people get the virus.

ClaryFray · 05/07/2020 13:01

She's of an age where it is her own choice. For that yabu

gotothecooler · 05/07/2020 13:19

I do think the whole mask issue is quite revealing about how people care for others - our family has chosen to wear masks in crowded places as we want to reduce chains of transmission.

So you see me walking about with no mask and presume I don't give a fuck about my family?

Thanks. Thanks so very much.

I have literally just started going out again in the past few days and this kind of attitude is going to have me hiding in my house again after the 10th July.

I have a breathing problem, not asthma, but it affects me every minute of the day. I can't and I not be wearing a mask. I am short of breath when walking round the supermarket and my GP has clarified a mask will hinder, not help me. I'm dreading going to the shops without a mask for fear of being branded a cunt by people like you.