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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to not want to talk.

10 replies

romdowa · 03/07/2020 17:47

So I moved country to be with my oh last year. Weve had our ups and downs and I've forgiven emotional cheating a few weeks just before lock down and some substance abuse during lock down. We were due to move in the next week as well. He has been painting the new place .
All week he has been weird and yesterday he had a massive emotional break down , panic attacks and crying. Eventually he calmed down but refused to talk , saying that it was just everything getting up on top of him. So come this morning he was just the same and I asked him to just tell me what was wrong and I had an idea of what was coming , I was right. He wanted me to leave and go home. So I got up and dressed and met a friend for socially distanced walk. When I got back he was getting ready to go to the new place and he asked me did I want him to come back in and to talk , I said no that there was nothing to talk about. That was before noon and I've heard nothing since.
When (if) he returns this evening aibu that I just dont want to talk about it , it's over and I'd rather just get through the weekend and get my flight home monday morning.

OP posts:
Itsjustabitofbanter · 03/07/2020 17:49

That’s so shit op! Have you got somewhere to go back to? Has he said why he wants you to go?

romdowa · 03/07/2020 17:51

Luckily I can go home to my parents!! He just said he cant do it anymore. Tbh I dont think I can either, I've spent all lock down paranoid that he is talking to others or abusing substances and I'm tired of it. I thought we could make it work but when he said it this morning I just felt relief.

OP posts:
BlessYourCottonSocks · 03/07/2020 17:51

YANBU. He's ended the relationship and told you to fuck off, basically.

He doesn't now get to insist you talk through how you feel with him.

Itsjustabitofbanter · 03/07/2020 17:52

It sounds like you’ve had a lucky escape tbh. What an utter arsehole

mbosnz · 03/07/2020 17:53

I think you've had a lucky escape.

romdowa · 03/07/2020 17:53

@itsjustabitofbanter yes I agree , I was going to leave when I caught him cheating but he begged me to stay , so I did and gave him another chance but it's just been lie after lie after lie. I dont even know this guy any more , if I ever did.

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TweetUsOnFacebook · 03/07/2020 18:12

It sounds like maybe he feels guilty and he wants to relieve his guilt but you don't need a post mortem. Just say goodbye and farewell and leave and get on with your life.

Itsjustabitofbanter · 03/07/2020 18:40

What’s the deal with the property you were moving into? Have you tied into anything?

romdowa · 03/07/2020 18:42

@itsjustabitofbanter it's in his name as I wasnt free when he met with the ll, we were meant to add me onto the lease when we could meet the ll together

OP posts:
romdowa · 03/07/2020 18:48

Only thing we have connecting us now is the cat we got but sadly I cant take him with me as my parents dogs at home arent cat friendly 😨😨

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