Back to work

[RyanBergarasTeeth]

I'm mostly here just to rant really. I have worked for 4.5 years with a company on a 0 hour contract never really progressing due to severe bullying. Now the company has been reopened for 4 weeks now and people who started 4 years after me have been brought back and given full time hours whilst ive been kept in the dark and told to enjoy furlough. But now i have realised i dont have a job to go back to. With these newbies back full time i would only be required if 2 or more people called in sick on the same day. This is after years of other people starting after me and get promoted instead of me and getting full contracts whilst my hours are repeatedly cut yet because i never did anything wrong they couldnt outright fire me. Now i know theres no job for me come october and to make matters worse dp has a very low wage and we are currently ttc so i know i need a new job but its hard. Every job i apply to demands 5 years experience which i dont have except retail and theres really no perminant retail jobs in thr area right now. I just feel defeated and anxious with it all. Iabu to feel this is out of order because everyone else at work is quiet happy to get promoted over me whilst acknowledging i am being treated awfully.

I'm in a similar position most of my work colleagues back I'm still on furlough. How can you enjoy furlough knowing that it's likely you may not have a job to go back to? I to have been there around 5 years reliable and worked hard but loyalty doesn't count.
At my place it's very much if your in with management not how hard you work.
I'm still looking for other jobs things are starting to come up.Ive tried to be open minded about jobs to apply for and not all want experience. Your workplace sounds toxic like mine keep looking job wise and anything that is half suitable is worth going for.
After the way I've been treated don't feel like going back anyway.

@ilovegreentomatoes sorry to hear you are in the same position its awful isnt it?! And yes very toxic its horrible as in some ways i dont want to leave as i do love my job on the other hand i cannot continue being screwed over like this. It scares me as i have ocd and anxiety and feel really thick so im worried if i get a new job i will be so useless i will be sacked within a fortnight. The only jobs really coming up at the moment are care work which im not willing to do again. Been there done that suffered bad injuries the first time and with ttc i dont want to do that again. Bar works the same done it but bars are so far again i couldnt afford taxis home every night. I want to try and become self employed in the writing and editing field but have no experience and self employment scares me as i dont know how on earth self employment works.