AIBU to ask what you think about this?

[Thinkingabout1t]

The transgender children's charity Mermaids has been immensely influential in the past few years, advising politicians, media and large organisations.

If a boy says he's really a girl born in the wrong body, or a girl denies that she's a girl, Mermaids recommends not discussion but affirmation -- by teachers and other adults, as well as by parents.

Mainstream media and politicians have fallen over themselves to agree. The number of children being prescribed drugs to prevent puberty has rocketed in recent years.

But now, says Jo Bartosch in the online magazine Spiked, questions about the influence of Mermaids on clinical bodies, its response to critics and the science behind the ‘born in the wrong body’ approach have begun to tarnish Mermaids’ highly polished image.
www.spiked-online.com/2020/07/03/mermaids-leading-children-up-the-trans-path/

The role of trans groups, including Mermaids, in the promotion of transition as a cure-all solution for troubled young people, is alleged to have prompted a spate of resignations at GIDS [the Gender Identity Development Service], with 35 staff members leaving between 2016 and 2019," says Bartosch.

Recently, James Kirkup noted in The Spectator, the NHS changed its advice about puberty blockers from
"The effects of treatment with GnRH analogues are considered to be fully reversible, so treatment can usually be stopped at any time" to
"Little is known about the long-term side effects of hormone or puberty blockers in children with gender dysphoria."
www.spectator.co.uk/article/the-nhs-has-quietly-changed-its-trans-guidance-to-reflect-reality

A recent statement by minister for women Liz Truss emphasised the need for safeguarding children. This has been met with a campaign of letter-writing and a furious public statement by Mermaids, says Bartosch.

Finally, it seems questions are beginning to be asked about the ideological bias of Mermaids and the charity’s influence on government. ... The story of Mermaids’ success is testament to the credulity of adults who should know better, and the vulnerability of the children they ought to protect.

Well worth reading. But what do you think?

DuDuDuLangaLangaBingBong that sounds absolutely par for the course. They literally rub their hands with glee at a trans kid so they have their little box ticked for being inclusive enough.

I never really doubted my child was going to go through with this, it has been going on for many years, well before trans was a massive thing, and has never faltered. However I was never willing to risk their future health or fertility on it. Now my child is able to make those decisions and I am, as I always have been, supportive.

I dont think support should look like total agreement though. It should be wait and see, it should be "we are going to talk about the difficult things so your choice can be totally informed", and heaven knows that's what I have done. We literally sat and watched operations, discussed all the side effects, all the negative aspects etc.

For a huge percentage its seen as though they fall asleep and wake up with a fully functioning body, no set backs or side effects, its seen as a miracle cure.

Puberty blockers are practically handed out like sweets now, and told it's to give the kid thinking time. People simply do not look into it enough.

I do have a transgender child, I do not agree with total affirmation though.

It's a difficult process, and it should be difficult tbh, it's a massive decision.

Mermaids prey on the parents of children who are self harming and suicidal. They quote statistics that basically tell you your child will die without medication.

If the 'experts' that schools and medical professionals are telling you to seek advice from are telling you your kid will die without medication, and you have a child threatening suicide and self harming, then the majority of us would absolutely take the option of medication. Its so bloody distressing to see your child like that with a potential 'cure' there.

The whole thing is heart wrenching.

I'm always so conflicted on these topics. I'm fully supportive of trans people and disgusted by the discrimination they've suffered and continue to suffer (more likely to be victims of violence, more likely to commit suicide, etc.). I also consider myself to be a very lefty/liberal type person and I'm fairly young, so my peers are quite vocal on this issue.

But I always have so many doubts about aspects of it, and I often feel guilty about that. I disagree wholeheartedly with giving children puberty blockers, trying to give underage children sex change operations, breast binding etc. - not because the child/teenager is too young to know if they're trans or not, but because from a medical standpoint it's wrong. It's unethical. You don't give someone treatment with massive risks unless said treatment is absolutely necessary and beneficial in the long run and in many cases these treatments AREN'T. They don't 'solve' anything. Making a twelve-year-old infertile and increasing their risk of certain types of cancer won't help them to navigate gender stereotypes and find their place in society.

As a bisexual woman, I'm also extremely uncomfortable with a) the erosion of safe spaces for those who are female by sex, rather than by gender and b) the trend of telling those attracted to the same sex/gender that they're trans rather than gay/bi/lesbian. The former is not because there are necessarily a bunch of men waiting to ambush women in the toilets. It's about feeling safe, not just being safe. So many women suffer violence, sexual or otherwise, from people with penises. It's not fair to expect them to just get over that. And the latter is an erosion of the LGB rights and culture that so many have fought so hard for. It's as though it's more socially acceptable for someone to have a trans son in a relationship with a woman than a lesbian daughter, when both should be equally respected.

I'm fully supportive of trans people and disgusted by the discrimination they've suffered and continue to suffer (more likely to be victims of violence, more likely to commit suicide, etc.).

Neither of these things are statistically true though whattimeisitrightnow. They are peddled as facts but not borne out by any reliable studies. You are more likely to be murdered BY a transwoman than a transwoman is to BE murdered. And as for the suicide myth....

www.transgendertrend.com/the-suicide-myth/

I think Susie Green is a fucking ghoul that should be in prison for child abuse.
Why isnt she?
Its against the law to take your daughter abroad to be cut so it should be when you do the same to have your son castrated.
I dont know how they have managed to gain such traction and high profile and I'm looking forwards to the day the whole grotty org comes crashing down.
Will be interesting to see all the sad silly twats that have endorsed the sterilising of children back peddle furiously when it does.
Sterilising children is not ok. Its sick and twisted.
We will remember you fuckers.

Tesco

whattime it's important to remember that a lot of the statistics used in claims of suicide and murder are often either worldwide or from the US where there are much fewer laws for anyone who is trans protecting against for example being fired or verbal abuse etc. A large number are from TW sex workers elsewhere who are indeed put at more risk, just as women are who are trafficked and in prostitution.

There is also a difference between criticisms about individual's personal choices and the actual ideology or structural forces at play. Especially when it's influencing children.

This is an extremely good point I've just seen on twitter. Kristoffer who has liked it is a transman who wholly believes, as many trans people do, that children and young people must be told the truth and not swayed into thinking that how they feel right now is how they may feel longer term.

Hence why we have worryingly increasing numbers of detransitioned young adults.

The more I learn about Mermaids the more worried I become. Their power and hold on those big names Virgin, Tesco, Starbucks is scary. Do none of them do due diligence or at least a Google when they support this charity?

Suicide ideation or encouraging suicide to get your own way or parents feeling worried about suicide just is not the way The Samaritans train to talk about suicide. Any organisation that is constantly talking about 'saving lives' (I'd rather have a trans daughter than a dead son) in the way Mermaids does is a major concern and needs a thorough investigation.

What they really mean of course is 'id rather have a straight daughter than a gay son'.
Newsnight investigation into the tavistock clinic highlighted this as a concern, its conversion therapy.
The way they talk about suicide is completly irresponsible. And wrong.
Where is the due diligence?
We need to be asking these companies and holding them to account.
The whole thing is sick as far as im concerned. How can sterilising and castrating children ever be ok? I dont get it.

Thanks for all the thoughtful comments, observations and information here. Sisterly love and sympathy to DuDuDuLangaLangaBingBong and Transkid and all whose children have had a difficult time made a lot worse.

As a long-term Guardian reader (now ex), I felt as if I’d stepped back into reality when I discovered Mumsnet, especially the FWR boards. It was like stumbling out of an enclosed space where the air was becoming unbreathable, out into the fresh air. Thanks for reviving me.

I believe sanity will eventually overcome this mad ideology. We just have to keep backing each other.

I dont know how they have managed to gain such traction and high profile and I'm looking forwards to the day the whole grotty org comes crashing down.

It's going to be an almighty crash and, you're right of course bluebells, all those pp who donated and promoted them will be running in the other direction. It makes my stomach turn to see Tesco donate a large amount of money - I just think of the further damage they will do with it.