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DH wants to go to a conference 2 weeks before my due date..

10 replies

KindMum · 26/09/2007 19:19

It would be for 2 days (1 night) and is around 5 hours drive away. We live abroad and I am reluctant to depend solely on the one friend who could help out with DD1 if need be. There is noone else. And I would have to give birth with no other support, a particular concern as my first delivery was very fast. Am I being unreasonable to tell my DH that I don´t want him to go? The conference is not an important one; someone else will go in his place.

OP posts:

PestoMonster · 26/09/2007 19:23

Yanbu, I would be very upset if he went in your circumstances. Different if you had family or more close friends nearby, but you haven't so I don't think he should go.


ellehcim · 26/09/2007 19:24

No way are you being unreasonable. DH was banned from going further than a half hours drive in the run up to my due dates. I also banned him from drinking for the whole month before just in case! Put your foot down girl and make the most of the fact that you have a bit of emotional blackmail power whilst you're pregnant.


funnypeculiar · 26/09/2007 19:24

YANBU. But then I gave birth 4 weeks early to ds (perhaps you should remind him second babies tend to come earlier...)
I know it's only one night, but it sounds like you'd be in a rough situation if anything did happen


flowerybeanbag · 26/09/2007 19:25

YAdefinitelyNBU, however important the conference is!


lulumama · 26/09/2007 19:25

i think he should be there for you, you could be early, and you could have a fast labour.. if he can miss it, he should, for sure, you need his support.


3andnomore · 26/09/2007 19:29

agree with teh others...if it isn't an important come first...would have been different if it was somehting that would have a series impact on hisc areer or something he would have been unable to get out off...but in this case, it doesn't seem to be the case...
talk to him...I don't men always quite get it, unless it is spelled out to them!


KindMum · 26/09/2007 19:32

Pleased you think I´m not being unreasonable. I´ve spelled out the reasons why I don´t want him to go but he doesn´t really see there is a problem. And it doesn´t help that he mentioned he would enjoy the "break" (from us/paretal responsibilities...)

OP posts:

glitterchick · 26/09/2007 19:34

YANBU - All my births (4 of them) were very quick (within an hour) and early (up 2 weeks on some of them). 38 weeks pregnancy is considered term so I don't think he should go if he doesn't have to.


3andnomore · 26/09/2007 20:12

for you at your husband
(I bet you would love that break,


Smithagain · 26/09/2007 21:11

YANBU. My DH missed out on a business trip/jolly that he REALLY wanted to go on, because it was three weeks before my due date. And of course nothing happened, but I felt so much more comfortable knowing he wasn't miles away. We have talked about it since and he still agrees it was the right decision.

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