Visitation

[AmberValentine]

So, my ex and I have been split up for over a year with a divorce in the works.
At the time of the separation our dd was just turned 2.
We agreed to flexible visitation until she started nursery.
The topic has come up recently as she will be starting nursery in September.
I have offered that he has her from Friday after school until tea time on Sunday once a fortnight and from Friday after school till midmorning on the Saturday the weekends inbetween.

Hes argued that this isnt fair and he wants her 2 weekends on then one weekend off.

Aibu with my offer?

Do you work? Do you have other commitments?

Could be a maintaince issue, trying to reduce payments by having more contact. But seems a bit unfair you theoretically get her 1 weekend a month a time. You ertainty wont get the benefits of week day parental enjoyment if doing meals, homework, bed and school run etc. Not fair. Every other weekend fair. Maybe suggust he have child Thursday on the weekend he doesnt have her just for tea or phone contact etc.

If you are getting divorced then your solicitor can advise and deal with this for you .

This weekend thing is breeding a disney dad. I'd strongly suggest working with a solicitor, to ensure that he not only pays the appropriate level of maintenance, but also to ensure he takes an appropriate level of actual parenting.

Thanks.

I work but only through the week when she's at school.

He doesn't work, gets around £1500p/m in benefits but csa calculator says he doesn't have to pay any maintenance because he's on benefits which I think is unfair.

I've never stopped him seeing her and there has been a couple of occasions where I've asked him if he wanted to have an extra day/afternoon this past 6 weeks... but he already had plans with his new girlfriend. Now if it was me I would forego an afternoon with my new partner in order to spend some extra time with my child but that's just me.

I've emailed my solicitor this morning.

If he doesn't work then he should be doing more mid-week and every other weekend surely?
Can he do school picks up etc to give you a break in the week?