I posted in staff room but no responses yet so posting a summary here hoping I’ll get a response.
I’m feeling very strange and anxious about a job I will start in September. I’m having regular weekly, sometimes 2/3 a week online meetings. Ordinarily this wouldn’t happen pre-covid as you would not be expected to attend meetings for a job you haven’t even started!
I feel I’m not coming across how I’d like to. I know if I was to just start in September I would be professional, confident and more myself. These meetings are very weird for me. I feel I made an idiot of myself in a recent one as I was very nervous and awkward and I was trying to fit in with others who were joking around! Surely my new colleagues must realise it’s a daunting experience for a new member of staff or they are probably thinking I’m a shy and nervous person and this impression will stick. Apart from a few days here and there of temping, I’ve not been in a full time job for few years, so maybe it’s anxiety about working again. I feel kind of sad that I had until September to get my self prepared but due to covid I feel I’m already back in work.