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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU - trigger warning for miscarriage

26 replies

PeonieCole · 24/06/2020 15:56

I am currently 7 and a half months pregnant.

My sister recently had a miscarriage at 10 weeks. She had some spotting over several days, went for an early scan, and was told that the baby had never developed beyond the first four weeks or so. She was advised just to wait for it to pass naturally, which it did a week or so later.

We were all totally devastated for her. It was a much wanted baby, and she and her husband were understandably hugely excited about it.

I found it very hard to know how to support her in the weeks that followed her miscarriage, because I knew she might find the fact of me being pregnant hard to deal with, and I also expected she didn’t want to upset me by talking about miscarriage while I was pregnant. Probably as a result of this, she hadn’t said a word to me since it happened until today, either by text or phone (which is quite unusual because we spoke every day before).

I’ve been checking in with her by text. At first it was every couple of days, more recently every 3-4 days as she hasn’t been replying. Nothing she needs to reply to, just messages saying things like ‘thinking of you’ and ‘love you’. I also sent her a box of her favourite luxury cosmetics and a couple of other bits like new pyjamas and a face mask she likes. I didn’t expect any acknowledgment of these and didn’t mind her not texting me etc, because I felt like it was up to her to decide how she wants to communicate. I just wanted her to know I was thinking of her.

Anyway - that would all have been totally fine, except that today she has sent me a really long email (we never email each other) saying she is really disappointed in how I have responded to her miscarriage. Her specific concerns are that she thinks I shouldn’t have sent ‘normal’ messages in the family WhatsApp because that was insensitive, and that I told our mum I didn’t want to hear details of her miscarriage.

The text messages thing feels unfair, because for about a week after it happened nobody sent messages on the family WhatsApp (very unusual for us). After a week or so after it happened my mum started sending very gentle things (photos of nice countryside, videos of her goats etc) and so I sent a couple of pictures of my garden. Nothing that required a response etc. Other people in the family have also texted on that group in the last week or so.

The bit about telling mum I didn’t want to hear details was because one evening my mum was forwarding to me the messages my sister was sending her describing the actual mechanics of the miscarriage. I did tell my mum that I would prefer not to receive these because it felt like a breach of my sister’s privacy, and because it was distressing to me while pregnant. It wasn’t a fight at all - mum apologised and stopped, and we carried on chatting about other things. But I assume she must have told my sister what I said (I have no idea why she would do this).

Anyway - sorry for the essay. My question is, what do I do now? I don’t really think I have done anything wrong, but I also don’t want to hurt my sister when she’s hurting already. Do I apologise to keep the peace? Do I tell her I don’t think I have been unfair but that I appreciate she is hurt anyway and needs some time / space? Do I ignore? We’re close and I hate to leave something festering, but I’m happy to take the hit and apologise when I know she’s going through such a tough time. What I don’t want is for there to be a narrative that I’ve been selfish and mean when I have really tried very hard not to be.

OP posts:
PeonieCole · 24/06/2020 16:27

Anyone? Sad

OP posts:
Lucy40ishere · 24/06/2020 16:37

This sounds like a really difficult situation. If I was you I would apologise & just be really honest that you didn’t know how to react & you are sorry if you offended her in some way. It sounds like you have done some lovely things to show her you are thinking of her but she is likely to feel very resentful of you even if it isn’t rational.

DeerHeart · 24/06/2020 16:39

Hey, sorry no one has responded to you. I had some very bad reactions when I was pregnant from those who couldn’t conceive, one friend never spoke to me again, just because I was pregnant and she wasn’t, it’s a very difficult situation.

Right now, your sister is grieving and struggling and her anger is directed at you. Don’t ignore, if you let it fester then it can get worse. There are two of you to consider here; her and her feelings AND you and yours, you are pregnant and don’t need the hurt or stress either. I would recommend contacting her and asking if there is a good time to talk. Explain to her that you didn’t realise you were being insensitive and thought you were doing the right thing by her. It’s tough on both of you right now, but you both need each other right now. Ask her outright what you can do to make things easier for her, I think having her tell you would be best.

I feel for you, it’s such a difficult position, but your sisters and you just need to talk it through.

Lucy40ishere · 24/06/2020 16:39

I’m also not sure how she heard about you not wanting to hear the details about her miscarriage. Did your mum tell her?

atimetobealive · 24/06/2020 16:40

YANBU op.

Your mum has breeched your privacy by telling your sister a twisted story.

I’d be honest with your sister. I’m not a fan of apologies to keep the peace when you’ve not done anything wrong. I think that festers resentment.

I’ve had a miscarriage and it’s a painful time but it’s not fair to take it out on others who haven’t done anything wrong.

atimetobealive · 24/06/2020 16:40

Fosters*

Wynston · 24/06/2020 16:41

Someone will come along soon op and give you some really useful information.
Im sorry I dont have much to offer......I think you were kind and acknowledged youre ds.
You seem to have kept the lines of communication open and accepting of the fact she wasnt in a place to reply.
I think if it were me I would appologies for the fact she felt like that but I would try and point out how you have done in you're op how you felt you were dealing with it??

PeonieCole · 24/06/2020 16:42

I’m also not sure how she heard about you not wanting to hear the details about her miscarriage. Did your mum tell her?

I think she must have done - I can’t see any other way. It’s not like my mum to try to stir up trouble so I expect it was thoughtless or accidental rather than deliberately difficult, but it obviously hadn’t helped.

Thank you so much for the advice everyone - it really helps.

OP posts:
NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 24/06/2020 16:44

Just continue to be kind and thoughtful.tell her you are sorry if she hasnt felt your response is right but you are doing your best. Ask if theres anything you can do for her.

It's an awful situation for everyone really. I'd had a miscarriage just as a friend & my sister were having babies, it was awful but was my third and I had almost got desensitized to it Sad

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 24/06/2020 16:45

Its tricky and I think she is being unreasonable but it's understandable if that makes sense. I would probably apologise for hurting her, and say you weren't sure what she needed at the time and weren't sure how to act, and what does she need from you now to make sure it doesn't happen again given everyone deals with things differently and there is no manual to deal with a grieving relative.
I'd also be having words with your mum about why she told your sister that, it sounds like she was getting in the middle and shit stirring, does she often do this? And put your sister right on that point - tell her if she wants to talk you're there for her but weren't sure if what she told your mum was confidential

otterbaby · 24/06/2020 16:49

From what you've described, you've been very thoughtful and considerate towards her. It sounds like she's grieving and those emotions are presenting themselves as anger towards you. I would just be honest - others were posting in the group chat so it didn't seem too forward for you to either. And I'm sure once time has passed, she'll understand that details of a miscarriage can be upsetting to hear as a pregnant person.

It's a tough one, but considering you are very close to her, I think you just need to be honest and hopefully sort it out to avoid future resentments.

PeonieCole · 24/06/2020 16:52

it sounds like she was getting in the middle and shit stirring, does she often do this?

No, not at all - she’s usually hugely supportive and easy going. I expect she was trying to be supportive to both of us and just got it wrong. Maybe she was worried my sister was texting me the same info and was telling her not to or something like that? Not trying to make excuses but it would be really unlike her to deliberately cause tensions.

I suppose it’s possible also that my sister is annoyed at mum for telling her that but doesn’t want to lash out at mum, who has been a major support for her, so is directing it at me instead.

I think it’s a good idea for me to respond to say my intentions were good but I appreciate it hasn’t been what she needed, and to ask what I can do (if anything) to support her better. That may mean doing nothing but at least she will know she has been in my thoughts.

OP posts:
Lucy40ishere · 24/06/2020 16:52

I guess maybe your mum mentioned it to you sister in passing & then unthinkingly expanded on details. If it’s not like her then I doubt she meant to do it. But it definitely sounds as though it didn’t help! Family what’s app groups can often be a source of misunderstanding too, particularly during lockdown!

PeonieCole · 24/06/2020 16:54

@Lucy40ishere that is very true!

OP posts:
Cocobean30 · 24/06/2020 17:04

I would ask your mum to rectify her mistake and explain what actually happened with the text messages.

SkiddySkidz · 24/06/2020 19:27

Bad timing and mis communications are the two worst culprits for damaging relationships. It sounds like you have a case of both here, so I feel for you. I lost my closest friend due to similar interactions to what you have described, except I didnt ever get the angry email woth her feelings sent to me, just ghosted. At least you have an opening here.

It is obvious she is taking her pain out on you a bit and I think she might not be able to see it right now but will in time. As PPs have said, now is the time to be as gentle as possible, explain that there have been some crossed wires and that you didn't know what to do for the best but the last thing was to make her feel the way she is now. You obviously miss her too and want to continue sharing your pregnancy journey with her whilst helping her through a very painful grieving process. I feel for you both and hope you manage to sort it out. It would be nice to try and arrange some face to face contact if you can. I imagine that will make all the difference in the world.

Malbecblooms · 24/06/2020 21:38

You sound really lovely and thoughtful

I have been in your sisters position. I have never felt pain like it. There was 4 weeks between our baby and theirs so it was such s reminder of what we should have too. I wasn't especially rational during that time.

In face for the first 2 years of my nephews Life I wasn't very rational but my sister in law forgave me and now I can see I wasn't in my right mind for saying and doing the right thing.

It's tough for you both. X

Roxymoomoo · 24/06/2020 21:57

Apologise to sister in email say how you feel

If your mother does not seek to remedy this automatically - watch out for that in future. She sounds a little immature.... likes to be in the middle of the drama??? Not where a mother should be

Dozer · 24/06/2020 22:01

OP doesn’t have anything to apologise for!

Suggest trying to meet up to discuss it.

candle18 · 24/06/2020 22:15

It doesn’t sound like you have anything to apologise for but I think in this case it’s not worth trying to make her see your point of view. That might lead to further conflict and your relationship with your sister is important. I’ll be tempted to apologise (even though you didn’t do anything wrong) as she may just be hypersensitive and a bit irrational just now.

Lynda07 · 24/06/2020 22:16

I don't think you've done anything wrong but your mother was wrong to tell your sister what you said.

Tell your sister that you feel sad (not apologising), at how badly you and mum have handled it, just reassure her again of your love and support and get on with life. Perhaps leave the whats app alone for a while.

It will blow over and, hopefully, sis will be pregnant again soon.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

redwoodmazza · 26/06/2020 10:18

Her emotions are all over the place.

Just apologise if you've hurt her and ask her what you can do now to make amends?

Ilikeviognier · 26/06/2020 10:26

Agree with the above. She is lashing out as she is grieving. It’s not rational. You sound like you have been sensitive and done your best, but in these situations you often can’t do right for doing wrong (ie it doesn’t matter what you’d said- she is not her usual self right now and you’re pregnant so she’s probably thinking irrational things about it not being fair and Such- which of course it isn’t). I had a miscarriage when everyone around me seemed to be pregnant so I remember the feeling. One woman came into my work with her baby immediately after my miscarriage and I had to leave the office in tears.

I’d say it’s a good suggestion to have a chat and perhaps ask what you can do to support her.

Nottherealslimshady · 26/06/2020 10:32

It's really tough situation. Shes grieving and probably feeling angry and jealous that you get your baby and she doesn't get hers.
But you also cant pretend you're not pregnant to appease her. I dont have any advice just dont be too hard on yourself

PreggoFeminist86 · 26/06/2020 10:44

Oh OP, what a sad & difficult situation.

I think you just need to be very honest, essentially tell her exactly what you have told us. Validate her feelings, explain that you would never intentionally hurt her, that you have been trying to give her the time she needs & you're sorry you misread what she wanted. It's obvious that you love her very much, and it doesn't sound worth arguing about right & wrong in this instance.

Do you live near enough to meet in- person (albeit 2 metres apart)? I think it would probably be much easier to resolve face-to-face than in writing, if that makes sense?

If she doesnt want to resolve it, try your best not to argue as it'll just cause unnecessary stress & it's the last thing you need during your own pregnancy. I'm sure she will come around with time, and you need to focus on yourself too right now x

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