I hate being called pet names

[alwayslosing]

How do you tell people you don't like being called hun / babe/ honey/ sweetheart etc?

I find it very patronising and I absolutely hate it. I have a name...why can't they use my name?

Someone I'm not close to at all has just messaged me and begun the text with: hi honey!...

Am I being unreasonable to respond by reiterating what my name is?!

Such terms of endearment used to be reserved for those we were very emotionally close to. As the UK has become a far more informal culture so the use of terms of endearment has become more widespread. I don't have a problem with this. But if you are are more reserved and formal person, then you're entitled to ask people not to use them to you. You have a right to do so - but you may well pay the price of being considered cold or standoffish. If you're ok with that, then go ahead!

Whilst YANBU there is no way to say that over text without sounding like a twat.

I am sure lots of people will tell you that you are unreasonable, but I know what you mean. I hate being called by shortened versions of my name or nicknames but I do find it hard to say so. Whilst it is generally perceived as "friendly" to call someone a nickname apparently its rude to object. Personally I think it is rude to call someone anything other than their preferred name and perfectly reasonable to want to have some say in what you are known as. But from previous discussions on the matter I have found I am in the minority so tend to grin and bear it in order to avoid conflict. I think you are quite reasonable to dislike it but I don't think it is easy to address the issue without upsetting the other party. I guess it depends on what your relationship is like with them.

If you see someone regularly you can always say "Would you ming calling me Barb? I've never liked pet names much". They might still forget but most people will try not to.

I would not bother with random people that you won't see again, or if you think it is someone who knows you but can't remember your name like a shopkeeper. It's just not important enough and seems petty. It's not innately disrespectful, and lots of people like it.

Me too!

I know it's not something I should address via text but I absolutely hate it.
I feel like people talk down on me when they address me this way ... especially if a younger person is involved and we are not even close.

Maybe it's my perception and I'm wrong. I'm not from the UK originally and maybe that's why I tend to be more sensitive

So you only ever use peoples names... No darling or anything else meaning you are showing affection?
Just interested.

I hate it too and find it really insulting and I am from the UK.
I tend to put up with it from people I know if I know they call everyone the same, although it does make me cringe.
To anyone else I simply say my name is Jabba please don't call me love/darling/sweetheart.

A bit off topic, but is "mum" a pet name?

I don’t mind darling, sweetheart etc but I hate babe. Drives me crazy.

I have a terrible habit of calling everyone "lovely" but that's it 😬. Ironically it got my back up at an old job where the female manager called me sweetheart or darling.

Babe 🤢

I really dislike being called hun/honey/babe, but don't mind love/sweetheart/darling. I think it has to do with who usually says which, I've just developed a negative association with some of them.

I'm not sure how to discourage that in a text without risking coming across as rude, so it would depend on my relationship with the person and if I think they'd listen (I've learned with some, it's just not worth even trying).

I don't use pet names outside of family, but use them liberally with them.

I don’t mind it generally but I think it depends on the context and who says it:

My elderly lady neighbour calling me love or sweetheart? No biggie.

A sleazy man in a pub calling me sweetheart? No thanks.

@Firstawake I don't use pet names. The only person I call baby is my husband and I sometimes address my 3 year old with honey bunny and that's about it.

I don't mind an old lady calling me sweetheart but I do mind a 20 year old calling me honey/babe/ sweetheart. I see it as patronising