Aibu to relax the home learning now

[Teadrinker6]

Morning everyone. Anyone else feeling like they just can't really do much more home schooling? My kids now have zero motivation for it and in secret so do I.
We started out well and have done absolutely everything that the school sent to us every 2 weeks. Its enough work for about 2 to 3 hours a day covering all subjects. This has been since March and we have really tried our best in difficult circumstances. My 9 year old has adhd and has a melt down each morning before we start the work. He will then answer 1 question then get up and do a handstand or roll about on the floor. Then come back and do another question. This is very frustrating for me (been in tears a lot) and it's very distracting for his younger sister who is sitting quietly at the table trying to get in with her own work..
There are 4 weeks left of the school term now and if they were really in school they would be winding down now. The set of work they sent us yesterday had the most work in it they've ever sent, double the amount of usual, at least 4 hours a day.

Aibu to filter all the "extras" out such as music, topic work, art, r.e etc and just focus on maths and English. Truthfully I just want to stop altogether

Ours are doing daily zoom lessons now, currently my year 5 and 6 are doing mathematics, later they have PHSE.

I am reaching the same conclusion Teadrinker6 the work is not differentiated and ds finds it really frustrating alongside the technology challenges. I fully understand that it is not possible to differentiate in the same way online as it is in class. It doesn't help us at home though. I think that we are just going to plough our own furrow and pursue more appropriate levels of work and worry about the consequences in September.

I think the maths is really important as it seems to move at a fast pace and would be hard to catch up on.

I think doing some writing a few times a week would be good. I find they forget how to spell quite quickly.

Also keep them reading. We read a chapter a night. One hates it, one loves it, but its made a difference.

Nothing else bothers me and would be added extras.

I hate to use this phrase but, have you been in touch with the school? My child has some learning difficulties and we could not cope with the work, sent and email and cue lots of nice emails from staff telling him to do what he can manage etc. I select a balance of things, not only maths and English but say those with some RE or History or cooking even to make things more varied.

Oh and no live lessons, one phonecall from school and just worksheets.

Well, for the other side of the story, we have completed all work up until now but our school finishes in 2 weeks as it’s private. So then we’ll be carrying on with a few hours of work every day throughout the holidays. Let’s face it, we can’t go out many places, it’s a long summer ahead and a few hours of work won’t hurt anyone. It’s an ideal opportunity to get your child ahead ready for September.

You need to do what works for you and ignore the judgmental comments. Particularly with a child with SEN you know better than anyone else what is going to work for them, and you don't need permission to make these decisions.

@haveatem Well done for keeping going. You are definitely appreciated. Please don't stop. We do all the work set, even if it does involve a few battles.

OP. It's a slog, we all know that but you've got this far, don't give up. Could your partner take a turn? Or could you find a fun way to do the non-core subjects, rather than just stop them?

@haveatem what an appalling post. Do you have any idea the pressure working parents have been under to try and do full time jobs, support home schooling with little (none in my case) support from the school? And yes before it is asked I have complained.

both of us have been WFH since lockdown. school has averaged at an hour a day, never more than 2 for my y1.

keep plodding at a manageable level. ditch the extra.

Thanks everyone. I will continue with the core subjects. I will not be made to feel guilty about not doing 100 % of every set of work. I have spoken to the school. In their exact words.... " oh theres loads doing nothing at all, it will all be caught up on anyway when they return to school".

I don't think you should pay much attention to criticism from teachers, you're not one, is it relevant to your current issues what they'd be doing in school right now since DC are not there? Teachers have a tool belt of methods to deal with poor motivation, zoning out and the classroom equivalent of rolling around on the floor. Many of those issues will actually be a reflection on the teachers ability (based on professional training and experience) to keep children engaged and the quality of teaching so not the child's fault.
You're a parent, you're an expert in that role, it's actually the most important role, far more important than any other adult in your child's life. Deliver what learning you can within the parent role, I agree to focus on core subjects especially maths and add fun tasks based on what your child is interested in. My ds (9) likes making models (god help me) and he is studying scripting for making Roblox games, has read a whole book on it in the last week. Don't forget physical education, kids don't get enough of that in school so make the most of the opportunity. Actually, do things that maybe you think your child should do more of at school, whether it's creative pursuits, outdoor learning, IT, cooking, so you can both say 'yeah we ditched the R.E but learnt everything there is to know on...'

Tbh if the school are saying it will all be caught up on then I’d identify weak areas, spend max 2 hours a day on those and call it a day.

But, (and this isn’t aimed at you specifically, more a failing on the schools part) lesson aims should have been communicated more effectively.

The travel brochure for instance - sounds like busy work but it’s a way of developing research and analysis skills in an age appropriate way - where do you find info on the city, what would make you go there, should you tell people about this attraction over that attraction - the same outcome (research and analysis) can come from a range of activities, the child can write about they’re favourite book, activity, TV show anything really.

The picture of the religious statue - in a classroom setting would have involved discussion about the religion, how the statue was presented in places of worship - notable versions of the statue and where they’re located - making the children engage with the topic.

I guess what I’m saying is - don’t dismiss busy work because it’s not normally just set to keep kids active, but you don’t necessarily have to keep to the defined task as long as the outcome is the same.

I find it helps keep our spirits up actually, but only during term time

@HaveAtEm

In answer to your question about would they be winding down in school now..no, they wouldn't! Although parents like to say that this is what is happening, in reality that isn't actually true, except maybe in some afternoons in Year 6 when they are preparing for their leavers assembly. The rest of us still have end of year assessments to do and we have to get our class ready for the next year...they are still 'moving up' so we have to make sure that they don't slip over the summer by putting in as much learning as we can now! No matter what you like to 'believe', schools and teachers are held massively accountable and do NOT just do bugger all in the summer term! This kind of myth makes me really angry, and to hear and see it still constantly bandied about (usually to justify parents taking their children out of school but as in your case now, to justify just stopping home learning because, well you can't be bothered to parent your child and stop him from rolling around on the floor 🤷‍♀️) makes me wonder why we actually bother sometimes 🤬. Do what you want! You will anyway. Others will tell you it's ok...because they'll be feeling the same and will find a way to justify it somehow. I give up now 😢

If you really are a teacher with those viewers children with SEN & their parents then get a different job. (Says an adult with ADHD who has a DC with suspected ADHD)

I’ve been filtering out the other stuff for weeks now anyway. We always do maths and English every morning (but with two KS1 children it takes double the amount of time). The other tasks are 90 percent of the time on the computer and I need to do my own WFH in the afternoons using my own laptop (DH has to use his laptop all day) so no available computer or time to do the other stuff.

OP I am with you. It's getting really tough. We gave up last week! We only have 2 more weeks of school anyway.

You’ve done an amazing job so far OP! DS is in year 6 and has done full days since lockdown began but he’s reached the end of his tether. No matter how hard his school or I try, sitting in front of a computer all day (as I’m WFH so baking etc is not really an option except on weekends) is not the same as school. Luckily he’s gone back this week. Next week he’s homeschooling while the other half of year 6 are in and then in school again the week after. We’ve agreed that next week we will do some transition work and the final week will be an extra weeks holiday for him. I work term time only so I’m off all summer with him but that last week is busy for me as I have reports to finalise etc.

I work in SEND and my advise is just do your best. Your DS is doing handstands and things because he NEEDS to. He needs to in school too but he knows that he can’t and he has to hold it in. Keep reading all through the summer and keep practising times tables and a bit of writing. Get them out as much as you can, if you can go for a walk/ run/ whatever before starting work as it will help to calm your DS’s mind. Enjoy this lovely weather because we never know when it’s going to end 😂

*advice not advise 🙈

@HaveAtEm it’ll be the same parents complaining when their kids go back and expecting you to catch their kids up! We’ve had the odd day off as it’s been hard, but I will not be allow my kids to fall behind in core subjects no matter how much they complain. I know even with what I’m doing at home, they won’t have made the progress over these 6 months that they would have done at school.

Why haven't your children made the same progress as they would have made at school? You're giving one to one tuition if you've actually been doing the work that you're slating the OP and others for not doing your children should be ahead of the game.

OP I think you'd do well to join some home school facebook groups locally for ideas. Home school is not the same as school. School is about educating thirty children of various abilities to get the best outcomes. There is busy work that is of bugger all use to anybody because the teachers need downtime to sort out classrooms and prepare for other subjects. Much of the time isn't just drilling education into your child. They also have Break/Lunch/Assembly/ RE/ "science" which often baking or something you do anyway with them.

Have you considered doing less every day but continuing on through the weekends?

OP you’re doing a fantastic job, remember that.
It sounds like you all need a little break. If it was me I would do the core subjects but once you can see they’ve had enough then stop. We are not robots and sometimes need a break. I’d also just focus on creative/outdoor stuff if they prefer that.
Remember be kind to yourself