Apologies if this turns out long I’m really trying to summarise it but give enough of a context. MIL is a highly critical, rude, no filter type of woman. She conveniently forgets things she has said or done in the past and accuses me of lying and making stories up.
Her family have drifted from her, they all live very close like within 15 minutes of each other, but we only see them every few years.
Her other kids don’t bother with her but she obviously denies all this and portrays an image where everyone loves her and I’m the only person she has issues with! Husband is kind of stuck with her as her other kids don’t bother.
She has caused countless problems in my marriage. She feels very entitled to everything e.g. she forced her self in delivery room minutes after I gave birth and was doing my first ever feed with baby. She used to come into my home any time of day using her spare key, she called me fat days after I gave birth and made numerous remarks about my physical appearance. I have over the years just put up with her and ignored her, sometimes I have questioned her and very occasionally I have erupted at her verbally.
She says the most stupidest things and plays on my mind. Such as I shouldn’t be taking the pram out in the street as it doesn’t look “respectable” to be walking around pushing a buggy! This made me really paranoid until I joined baby groups and realised other women were taking their kids out and about too in buggy’s. I also asked a few of them as I thought it was maybe a cultural thing that I was unaware of and they laughed and said your mil sounds crazy and of course there’s nothing wrong with taking baby out for a walk.
There are so many things I could write that she has said that would sound unbelievable but they are all true.
I know I probably sound like a 12 year old but I absolutely hate her, I cannot stand being around her. My blood boils thinking of her. One positive thing about lockdown was I didn’t have to see her. She makes me feel like I was the incubator and my kids are hers not mine. She flew into a rage when we were choosing names for my eldest, she had 3 names picked and told me I must choose only one of these. She also got down on her knees crying and put her hands together begging me to listen to her and please choose one of her names. I can’t get some of the things out of my head they keep playing over and over and sometimes I feel I am really going crazy.
If you’re still with me and reading this! then my question is how do I deal with her maturely? How do I get over when she denies the crap she has said and emotionally detach from her and stop getting sucked into her craziness? Life is so short and I don’t want to waste my kids childhood being angry at her.