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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

When did baby sleep get better for you?

35 replies

sunlightflower · 21/06/2020 15:32

DD2 is 4.5 months and we have hit the four month regression. It is horrendous. Up every 1.5 hours/2 hours all night long.

Formula fed. Trying every trick in the book, white noise, blackout blinds, plenty of daytime naps so not overtired etc etc.
Cosleeping doesn't help, neither of us sleep any better.

DH is a key worker so it's just me looking after her and her older sister full time and with this on top of lockdown I think I may actually be going insane.

Can anyone give me hope that this is going to get better soon? Her older sister never did this so I'm clutching at straws a bit and I know that all babies are different. I'm just desperate!

OP posts:

Twiglet2353 · 21/06/2020 15:34

Following as we're about to hit 7 months and we're still not over the four month sleep regression! 😩 💤

WhatsHappeningCaroleBaskin · 21/06/2020 15:35

DD is 2 next month, her sleep is no better than when she was a newborn to be honest! Her 5am wake up combined with 1 or 2 wakes in the night is a killer!

4.5 months is still tiny, as hard as it is, there's nothing to worry about and it's completely normal.

Poetryinaction · 21/06/2020 15:36

Well it will. In fits and starts. The problem is that they are individuals so you don't know. My first slept through from 11 months. It felt like a long slog. But my second slept through from 3 years. A d my third from 14 months.
Some work it out much quicker. It tends to get better not worse. I just can't tell you how much better and when.

claireyjs · 21/06/2020 15:36

Mine both started sleeping through at 9months. Before that both woke about 3am for a feed. Both bf if that makes a difference, I dont know.

Original poster

sunlightflower · 21/06/2020 15:45

I know it's normal and I'm not worried exactly. Just bloody exhausted.

OP posts:

WombatStewForTea · 21/06/2020 15:47

Mine is 20 weeks and definitely starting to see the end of the 4 month sleep regression now

Original poster

sunlightflower · 21/06/2020 15:48

@wombatstewfortea thank you thank you thank you. Just needed some hope.

I'm obviously not expecting her to sleep through the night yet but honestly don't know how much longer I can do this.

OP posts:

GillT333 · 21/06/2020 15:50

Is your baby in a routine? That was a game changer for us.

GenevaMaybe · 21/06/2020 15:51

Is she going down awake?

Original poster

sunlightflower · 21/06/2020 15:53

She goes down awake (but with a dummy) but then can't seem to get into a deep sleep so wakes up after one cycle. Have to pat her to get into next sleep cycle.

Have a bedtime routine but no daytime routine, just a nap every 1.5 hours ish.

OP posts:

WombatStewForTea · 21/06/2020 15:53

@sunlightflower it'll get better don't worry
Mine had lulled me into a false sense of security and was sleeping through (well 11-6am ish) so when she started waking up every 2 hours it was a shock to the system! I've ended up bedsharing again to get more sleep and she now only wakes at around 3am and 6am

helia · 21/06/2020 15:54

Mine didn't sleep through until 3.5 years old... They all get there in the end and you learn new ways of coping!

Yeahnahmum · 21/06/2020 15:55

Maybe cut one day sleep. Orrrr wake the baby up if the baby sleeps 'too long' during the day? I know many mums wouldn't want to do this but I always did. And then they would sleep beautifully at night time as they were exhausted haha. That could however mean a grumpy afternoon kid yes.... But.... boy o boy how good is sleeping at nighttime

Zelda93 · 21/06/2020 15:55

My dd was great up to 7mnths as she dropped her night feed at 4mnth and used to sleep through night and self settle!! BUT got to 7 months all that went out of window and now wakes at least 2 times a night but at least once on month does a 7pm to 7 am which then I can't sleep cos I think somethings wrong!! She's now 13 months and still wakes not for food or drink but just wants me there I know have to do the leave to cry but can't face it yet!!

Original poster

sunlightflower · 21/06/2020 15:55

@wombatstewfortea same here with the sleeping through early. That immediately worried me as last time round it was those babies who seemed to be hit hardest by sleep regression.

DD1 didn't sleep through early but also wasnt hit badly by the regression, her sleep just gradually improved over time. That was better for my sanity I think!

OP posts:

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 21/06/2020 15:56

My second babys sleep just got worse and worse over time, wake ups every 90 min, do we cracked at 7 months and sleep trained using the disappearing chair method. It worked the first night and saved my sanity. I wouldnt do it less than 6 months though. Feel free to PM me if you want any more details (we used a sleep trainer)

Restlessinthenorth · 21/06/2020 15:56

Mine was at about 11 months, and I hate to admit it, but of it is relevant, within less than a week of moving from breast to bottle feeding

LaurieMarlow · 21/06/2020 16:00

4 months sleep regression is such a kicker. My two slept beautifully until then.

DS1 we sleep trained at 9 months. It saved us all.

DS2 for various reasons we didn’t sleep train. It got better naturally by 18 months. That was a long year though.

If I were you I’d be looking at gentle sleep training methods, which I think you can apply from 6 months.

Good luck.

GillT333 · 21/06/2020 16:03

I’d highly recommend a daytime feeding and sleeping routine. My kids are both so different personality wise but it really did work for both of them and bar illness, gave us reliable 11-12 hour sleeps. Good luck. Feeling knackered is brutal.

GenevaMaybe · 21/06/2020 16:03

I had to ditch the dummy at exactly this age and it made an enormous difference

Pl242 · 21/06/2020 16:03

Sympathies. 4 month sleep regression was awful for both of mine. From my experience things seemed to get better all round from 6 months onwards. DD1 sleep through from 6.5 months. DS1 from around 9/10 months but only really consistently from about a year. But only had one feed at about 3 so wasn’t too bad. The difference in him between 4 months and 6 was significantly better. Good luck.

ghostyslovesheets · 21/06/2020 16:05

DD 1 - slept through from 8 weeks - never regressed
DD3 - finally slept through at about 8 months

dd2 - I think she was almost FIVE YEARS OLD before I got a full night!

Original poster

sunlightflower · 21/06/2020 16:12

I've definitely thought about ditching the dummy. It worked like magic on her older sister but it doesn't work like that on this one. If it was just getting up to give it back to her a few times a night (as it was for DD1) I'm sure I could cope.

However how do you give it up without either leaving to cry for god knows how long, or rocking/patting which I'd then surely have to get up and redo multiple times per night?

Thanks for all the sympathy and shared experiences. And giving me hope. I love her but she's driving me insane and I won't get a break until DD1 goes back to childcare in September.

OP posts:

GillT333 · 21/06/2020 16:15

Try a sleepytot dummy holding rabbit. Amazing contraption.

Snowpaw · 21/06/2020 16:18

I noticed a big improvement in my daughters sleep around the time she started walking / just after she turned one. I don’t know if the walking helped tire her out or what. She started sleeping through the night regularly then. Although she did also get ALOT of coughs and colds in a row that winter and coughing / sniffles kept us all awake for what felt like weeks on end.
She’s 19 months and sleeps very well at night from 7pm but wakes up very early at 5.30ish usually!

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