To think where the hell do they get the money (and time)

[BetteDavisWeLuvU]

Just sat browsing through Instagram. I follow a lot of house reno accounts because up until having DC we were renovating ours, so as well people I follow I also get targeted by other home accs.

Obviously in lockdown I’ve had more time to browse, and am just astounded with the sheer amount of these accounts and how amazing most of them are and I’m just constantly thinking how the f do they afford it, and have time.

I’m pt (only 20hrs) but have a senior role and DH runs his own professional services businesses and is in the high earner tax bracket, we also have a relatively small mortgage living in the north. These seem like normal folks with normal jobs, like us, but there is no way we could afford the scales of these renovations and in the timescales, whole 4/5 bed houses with extensions in 2/3 years.

And before anyone starts it’s not jealousy per se, but more where the f are we going wrong?!? And the time, some of these people have multiple kids, I just don’t understand how you could hold down a job which would pay you the sort of salary you would need to pay for these renos and the quality of fittings (DH works 14 hr days, I worked 11 hr days before DC) along with planning and project managing it all and looking after young children. What are we missing?!?

Nb. Yes know it could be family money etc. in some cases but this unusual, the sheer volume of these accs means it can’t be that. And also yes I know I should spend less time on Instagram!!

I was going to say similar to @Rumbletumbleinmytummy, it's all fake on Instagram. Taking pictures of other people's front rooms and claiming they're your own etc. Or it's all undeclared 'gifted'.

Don’t believe what you see on SM. Sometimes they are basically
redecorating/dressing a rented home.

We spent a lot on a renovation but had no money for 2 years afterwards as we were paying off the 0% interest credit card we took out that paid for the bathrooms and paint etc. It was a good decision for us but only because we knew we’d pay the card off without having to pay interest.

They might have great cars but chances are they are on loan/hire. They didn’t shell out for the cost of the whole thing and won’t own it at the end of it.

My advice that you didn’t ask for.
Don’t rate your life v Instagram. Your happiness won’t win x

14 hr days? That isn’t normal

@Rumbletumbleinmytummy, you should definitely try instagram. You have the level of stealth boasting right down.

We are about 2/3 into a major renovation (including loft conversion and big extension) of a 5 bed house in zone 2 London. It's cost more than we ever imagined but we will make it back and more in value increase. We did it by:

• selling previous terraced Victorian house (done up/extended) for almost the same price as double fronted/semi detached in need of much work in same area but better road (eg not by railway line)
• both relatively high earners (approx £250-300k annually between us depending on bonuses)
• increased mortgage by approx £250k
• inheritances on my side (only child with only one living parent so from other parent/grandparents)
• remortgaged buy to let flat owned by husband to fund extensions on previous property
• living in buy to let flat whilst renovations going on (14 months and counting )
• reined in holidays/spending - 2 years ago we were in the Maldives, not sure we'll be going anywhere for a while (at least with lockdown we don't feel like we're missing out)!

There will be a lot of sacrifices over the next few years but we can't see ourselves being able to move up the ladder again due to ridiculous London prices (unless we leave London but difficult due to jobs), so treating this as a long term home and investment/pension for when we do downsize/leave London.

We have a toddler and very stressful/time intensive jobs so little time to do work ourselves.

I have an insta account - more to record the process - but have hundreds rather than thousands of followers so no freebies sadly. I don't know how people find the time to style their house and photograph it regularly but I do notice the same and similar images being posted periodically. Ours is a building site so not that interesting yet.

I remember not too long ago when people used to move and live with an awful kitchen or bathroom or ugly flooring for ages before they could afford to replace things. It seems like it’s done all at once now instead of changing things as you could afford them. A lot of people are ticked up to the eyeballs trying to keep up these days.

With Insta accounts it’s all smoke and mirrors. When I look at the home accounts I follow they often show the same things over and over - the living room from the same few angles and you’re left wondering why they never show the other side. Or you get pictures of an amazing bathroom over and over with endless details but they never show the kitchen.

It’s a very artificial world. There’s just a weird level of perfection that’s not normal, nothing out of place, very staged photos. I’ve seen posts with people saying ‘I shouldn’t post this because I didn’t notice the shoes by the door’ . I like the pictures but would appreciate something more real. You can still have a beautifully decorated house with some of the normal household signs of life around.

It's not reaL life it's INSTAGRAM

Not real life KLAXON

I look at a lot of Istagram home accounts. I'm not sure why because they don't make me feel happy and frequently quite the opposite tbh. I've recently started looking at one renovation project. Young couple in their twenties, one of them has a job, the other is a student. They bought a house in an ok area and gutted it. State of the art kitchen, bathroom and now garden. In between the square of lovely things are photographs of their numerous long haul holidays where they certainly aren't on a shoestring budget.

I vaguely know the couple and I know they aren't recipients of inheritances or putting up photos of somebody else's house.

I cannot fathom how they are able to finance it. If I'm being really honest, today I was in tears when I looked at my own house which badly needs a new kitchen, a new front door and numerous other things. I don't know where we are going so wrong.....

If you peel back the curtain you find that just about anyone who has serious money has a relative somewhere who enabled or at least supported it. Even those great self-made entrepreneurs like Richard Branson and Alan Sugar, you look into it more deeply and they had a hand-up. Hell, even Matt Hancock's family are loaded and he's married to the granddaughter of a Baron!

Look into the background of almost anyone famous in the movies or arts or business or politics and you can find a guiding hand somewhere. It's a bit sad really - they actually think that it's all about them and their abilities.
A little off topic, I know.

I don’t think you can under estimate the boost getting a (relatively in the scheme of massive inheritance!) small boost from your parents early on can give you. DH’s family has given us/him around £200k over the last ten years. It meant our first flat was paid off after 6 years and when we sold we came away with about £500k plus we had been able to save a lot because the mortgage was so small. We bought a new house for $1.1M with 60% equity, 100k left in savings and manageable payments. Household income about £200k although when we first bought it was less than 1/3 that. My brother and his wife have similar incomes but bought a house 2/3 cost, bigger mortgage than us and left with little savings. We’re not crazy high earners but that early boost meant we came away with a lot of equity in our early 30s.

It has been a year and a half ago that disaster struck.
A rat (which I am convinced the bad kitty dragged in) chewed the hot water lead to the one effing week old new dishwasher. In the middle of the night.
The five month renovation nightmare began.
First the insurance adjuster sent a company to rip out the kitchen flooring and cabinetry and dry it out.
I spent the next five months battling a very bad restoration company to get my kitchen back.

Just so you know, some of the renovations you see online may well be restorations.

I had a life changing redundancy pay off. That helped to fund the actual build completely

I was going to say similar to @Rumbletumbleinmytummy, it's all fake on Instagram. Taking pictures of other people's front rooms and claiming they're your own etc. Or it's all undeclared 'gifted'.

I know at least one very popular "lifestyle" influencer on Instagram that does this. She's a neighbour of one of my work colleagues and it drives him up the wall. She even posted a photo of a National Trust property, insinuating it was her local pub and that hill from the famous Hovis advert as a view from her bedroom window! Her audience are mainly Americans lapping up the "ye olde English country lady" lifestyle though, so I figure she reckons they'd not be able to cotton on...

In my village a fairly young couple with 5 children - her a SAHM, him a mechanic - have just built a 6 bed house that's been valued at £450k.

They must be secret drug dealers or something, or mechanics are on much more than I thought!

We’re now embarking on a circa £100k renovation. We’re 32.

Dh saved from starting his first job at 16 which enabled us to buy our first home in our early 20s, we done ok on that property, made well again on the 2nd and have recently bought the 3rd for an excellent price for the area as it has been on the market over a year.

We’ve released equity and continue to add as much as possible to the savings. I work part time and dh works full time.

We don’t have fancy cars, holidays, our phone contracts cost us £10 month that sort of thing.

We’ve got a 5 year ish time scale and accept that it takes as long as it takes due to have one dc and one on the way. We save money by doing a lot ourselves.

I’m grateful for what we have and our opportunities, a lot of it is hard work and judgment, but also a lot of luck.

Our friend married a girl who’s family are all builders, in the last 5 years they have bought and renovated 2 houses on the outskirts of London. The first house they gutted and sold after 2 years at a huge profit. Their next house they purchased for 500k, she’s an opticians receptionist and he was a trainee accountant at the time, they have also had 2 children in the last 3 years. Neither come from poor backgrounds but I did wonder how the hell they have managed it. They have a dream house, the over 500k house was gutted (it looked like an elderly couple had it before hence the “cheap” price) it was a decent size etc and they had a giant extension built for a kitchen, it looks like it’s straight out of a magazine. It will have only cost them the materials and even then they’d be mates rates, but they must have had a hefty deposit and mortgage to buy it unless there’s a tree somewhere?

I inherited money when my Mum died and invested it into building a loft conversion to make 2 very large bedrooms and a shower room for 2 adult sons still living at home.

I keep wondering this too. On paper we should be able to afford a holiday a year and a couple of city breaks with some nice outings. We absolutely can’t. I don’t know how other people do it, in seemingly similar industry/jobs. We had to take equity out of our house to do a few small things. It pissed me off as that’s 6yrs of over payments etc, but it was the only way to get it done.

@TehBewilderness

It has been a year and a half ago that disaster struck. A rat (which I am convinced the bad kitty dragged in) chewed the hot water lead to the one effing week old new dishwasher. In the middle of the night. The five month renovation nightmare began. First the insurance adjuster sent a company to rip out the kitchen flooring and cabinetry and dry it out. I spent the next five months battling a very bad restoration company to get my kitchen back.

Just so you know, some of the renovations you see online may well be restorations.

Yes, our neighbours seem to have this happen. New roof due to storm damage, didn’t cost them a cent. Ditto new kitchen etc due to a leak

Dh and I were musing today that all the people we know who have bought a house have had help to do it. From right to buy, parents/relatives, divorce, to inheritance.
I wish I could help my kids to have a secure home but we have no money and rent ourselves.
There maybe an inheritance at some point but we will be too old to get a mortgage.
We do have a vague plan to buy fixer upper house with our kids and all live together
No Instagram renovation photos though😊

I cannot fathom how they are able to finance it. If I'm being really honest, today I was in tears when I looked at my own house which badly needs a new kitchen, a new front door and numerous other things. I don't know where we are going so wrong.....
That made me feel sad. As long as your house isn't a cesspit what does it matter if the kitchen is old or your front door is scruffy? There are hundreds of ways to do up your house cheaply, local selling sites/freecycle/eBay. It won't be a shiny Instagram boasting house but it will be your unique loved home.

They might have tradies as family/close friends who do the work for free or very cheaply. We bought a little two bed home in a great area that was completely uninhabitable (bathroom was collapsing through the floor, termite damage, needed full re-plumb and re-wire etc) and we did it for less than the equivalent of £15k because we had a lot of practical help. We didn’t even pay as much as we should for the materials as my dad/BIL/OH’s best friend had a lot of spare stuff left over from jobs and refused to let us pay for it.

Most people I know like that have family money. From parents putting down the deposit, to fully supporting their adult children with monthly allowances. Friends of mine appeared to be comfortable while she was a student and he did various MLMs. He was getting a £10,000/month allowance, plus cars and holidays all comped by his very wealthy family.

There's a well-known insta-mum who just happens to an heiress to one of the biggest fortunes in the US - and she never mentions it. She and her average-wage husband bought a £700k house as their first home. Spent several hundred thousands on renovations. Sold it. Bought two more million pound properties. Did them up "on a budget". They spend their summers split between two family owned holiday homes. Her husband's wage would barely cover the school fees their gaggle of kids attend. It's a lovely life, but totally unachievable for 99% of us.

I echo the point someone made saying don't believe what you see. Some of these 'budget' diy/home makeoever account look fabulous on filtered, edited squares on instagram, but I bet a lot look preety crap im reall ife. Painting UPVC doors, for example -(I've seen a lot of painted pink doors on insta) - get up close and I bet it looks tetrible. Same with painted tiles and baths etc.

Re those that have immaculate looking homes and appear to be gifted lots - you need to be rich enough to have the nice house etc in thr first place to get enough followers that you are then offered free stuff. Same with the dreaded Mummy Bloggers - those who seem to get the most freebies are the ones who don't work, clearly have rich husbands & spend loads of money anyway.

I think you have hit the nail on the head there! Many people seem to shop at Lidl/Aldi (nothing wrong with that)! and even then buy the most basic /minimum of everything necessary.They may just go camping or to Auntie Flos holiday cottage for free!You are having a good life ATM with a nice car and some good holidays.Shopping in Waitrose and enjoying some good food and wine topped up by a farm shop spend!That is having a good life I think .Everyone has different priorities in life .Enjoy yourselves and try not to be envious of others .As they say on MN"Comparison is the thief of joy!"