Please can we now ban the phrase -'key worker'

[Hoppybunny]

Way back in March it was relevant and distinguishing, but now the economy is creeping back to life why does every other post on mumsnet need to mention that they are a key worker! Surely every worker needs childcare provisions/access to shops etc and this badge of honour needs to end?

@Dougalthesyrianhamster a young family took their dogs for a walk in a nature reserve in our town (used to be a golf course, but was then abandoned but couldn't be removed due to protected wildlife) it's easily walkable for lots of people, they posted a picture of their kids and dogs on Instagram and without knowing the context this particular key worker commented telling this family that them clapping on a Thursday night for her was a stab in the back so they should stay inside. The guy tried to explain where they were and that they were well within the guidelines and she responded something quite nasty about her working for 20% of her salary whilst they got an extended holiday from work paid. I struggled to have any respect for her personally even though she was doing an important job

@Dougalthesyrianhamster it was a bit of a tangent but I relished in being able to rant about it because in real life I don't feel I can 😂

@ididntstop

Believe it or not if you continue to engage with and attack my I will continue to reply and defend myself, although you're welcome to stop engaging if you want (I feel you're one of those who must always have the last word), but don't try and tell me what to do.

I clearly stated there is a big distinction between some (not all, not even most) key workers who are taking the piss, wanting worshipping and thinking they are superior for what they do - these are the ones getting people backs up.

I was a 'key worker' for 4 years through college and university, I worked in care. I didn't do it because I was altruistic, or particularly cared about the people I worked with on a personal level, I did it because it was a job with decent pay that fit well around my studies (this is not to say I wasn't good at the job, I engaged well, acted professionally, said all the right things), I was really in it for the money.

People shouldn't be worshiped or applauded for doing the job they signed up to do and are getting paid for, people shouldn't complain about the aspects of the job they knew they'd have to do and expected when they went into it. This is not me saying they shouldn't be horrified about the pandemic and lack of PPE because that is unprecedented and the whole country is horrified by it. But busy 12 hour shifts are part of being a doctor/nurse, that is what I said shouldn't be complained about, let alone applauded.

A

Wow confused you are totally missing the point. It's not long shifts themselves that are the issue, it's what happens during these long shifts.

There is busy, then there is spending entire shifts watching people die, while there is no intensive care capacity left. I was writing DNARs to people in the 50s and 60s, and seeing patients deteriorate rapidly. During the peak this was harrowing, and the exposure was dangerous to the personal health of healthcare practitioners and auxiliary staff.

Staff died at my hospital, and many more colleagues became severely unwell. This is not normal working conditions, nor what we signed up for.

We were warned that we will all have PTSD by the end of this, and I believe I do have PTSD now. I want to get treatment for this, but I can't currently due to my working hours, ironically.

The last kick in the teeth is that those of us who caught covid-19 at work (which is nearly all of us), may have trouble getting life insurance, critical illness cover or even mortgages.

I'm not a hero, nor should I be treated as such. I worry that the hero mantra detracts from the reality that we are normal people, who require safe working conditions (ie PPE, psychological support, decent working conditions)

We are key workers though. This doesn't mean that we are heroes or martyrs, but it means that we need the infrastructure to allow us to work, which is mainly childcare and transport.

They are called “essential workers” here but that’s not used much as we are all essential. Schools, etc could not continue if the rest of us didn’t keep working and generating tax revenue. Someone had to fund it all.

I have no problems with the terminology because it’s just words. Not even my choice of words. But I’m done with all the boasting and virtue signaling. I enjoy listening to a radio show every weekend that plays listener requests. Since this started the requests have changed from the like of “please play xxx song for my husband because it his birthday” to “please play xxx song for my husband. He’s on the front line as a key worker doing 18-hour shifts and I am also a key worker also looking after 27 vulnerable relatives and doing the shopping for 9 families who are shielding and in my spare time I’m working in 5 food banks”. I asked for a song for our anniversary a few weeks ago and my request sounded so unworthy in comparison.

Do you hear yourself? You resent that some radio dj has prioritised those working on the frontline during a pandemic?

You'd never have survived WWII having to share the limelight with soldiers.

@TheHoneyBadger

Discussion on this thread aside. You absolutely should not be banding around 'sociopath' as an insult or calling anyone a sociopath off the cuff.

Sociopathy is a personality disorder and can be a serious MH issue for those that have it. Many people with this disorder do manage to live normal lives (some with intervention and help) but many also don't thanks to harmful stereotypes perpetuated by the media and by the casual use of it as an insult and in conversation. You wouldn't get to label someone disagreeing with you as someone with any other medical (MH or otherwise) disorder so you absolutely should not be using this one either. You wouldn't say 'ignore the retard' regarding someone disagreeing with your sarcasm or possibly even saying something stupid and this holds the same intention (labelling behaviour as a medical condition in an offensive manner) even if society has not yet progressed to recognise it as offensive and demeaning to those with this personality disorder as it is.

It’s used to signal that you are not allowed to disagree with them, them being so important and all that.

It’s not a mental illness it is under the personality disorder umbrella. The vast majority live normal lives and they are disproportionately represented in positions of power given a culture that rewards people for lacking empathy and compassion. It is nothing like calling someone the r word you used. Perhaps I should have said sociopathic which infers having traits of much as someone can be narcissistic without having npd.

Sociopathy gets bandied around in our society because much in society these days is sociopathic. Also narcissistic. I don’t apologise for seeing that and recognising how free some people seem to feel about expressing their sociopathic feelings and tendencies on an anonymous forum.

It's really tiring reading the unpleasantness of some of the PP on here directed towards genuinely hardworking keyworkers. This started as a thread debating whether keyworker was now a redundant word and being over used, that should rightly expect views from both sides. Unfortunately it became derailed by some individuals.

We can all RTFT to read PPs series of posts, even if the odd poster or two is attempting to misdirect people with 'what I said (meant) was..,' when it's clear they didn't or hadn't

I laughed reading the 'in WWII you'd have complained about sharing the limelight with soldiers' comment! But I shouldn't have laughed although it's witty, it's also a deeply poignant observation about some peoples' attitudes.

Hibblehobble, I can see many lovely PPs have tried to stop personal attacks on you, a doctor who simply said your reality. I'm really sorry to hear how tough it's been, I think many suspected it has been harrowing and exhausting, but how easily it's forgotten by a minority of empathy-challenged people or those unable to understand. They don't speak for the majority. We also know it's not over yet. Best to ignore them. I hope you get some rest soon, the support that will help, and I'm so sorry about your colleagues.

Well said HoneyBadger
I also agree with your earlier post about schools and teacher concerns about cramming pupils in

@TheHoneyBadger

It is a mental disorder. 'Sociopaths' have antisocial personality disorder. They should be treated with the same respect and support as people with BPD or OCPD ect are on here. Yes their actions can and often do negatively affect others but equally it is not solely their fault. It is a mental disorder. And when I said they're over and misrepresented in the media I was referring mostly to crime shows where they're often portrayed as murderers or cunning harmful criminals. Maybe 'retard' wasn't the perfect example but you wouldn't say 'ignore the autistic person' either and you shouldn't be saying 'ignore the sociopath' in the same way. It's a medical disorder and 1) shouldn't be blasély applied to those not diagnosed with it and 2) should not be used as an insult.

I'm immensely proud of the key workers in my family that have been very hard at work for the past few months. One has gone back to work after retiring. She would be safer staying retired.

One of my relative's neighbours was dismissing their job role and apparently had been saying they were flaunting their uniform on the washing line! Whilst she isn't front-line she is still classed as a key worker because she facilitates for those on the front-line. She helps them so they can do their jobs. I think it's all a bit pathetic. She's too busy getting on with her job to be having pissing contests with those trying to put her down because it makes them feel less important or something.

Not RTFT just first few posts.

DH is s key either.

We didn't send the kids to school as they are older and I am working FT from home.

He works for TFL and has carried on as usual throughout.

He personally knows 3 people at work that have died.

I don't know anyone who has.

I imagine he's the sort of key worker many would say is not really a key worker.

But that's what he's been dealing with.

I agree lots of people are/ were classified as key workers. But you know, maybe they were key? You need a lot of people to keep things going while everyone is indoors etc.

I don't understand why the term would, what, annoy?

I mean why really do you care? Is it a feeling that it's a term that makes people 'special' and get don't deserve it? That's pretty childish.

It's also been handy when explaining why he can't do xyz at whatever time as he's working his usual shift pattern. People seemed to assume everyone was at home. Eg I had an infection. They wanted him to come in at X time to bring some stuff. He's a key worker he'll be at work all day Saturday was a handy thing to say to explain why he wasn't around.

Sorry not Saturday, Friday.

But he still is at work most weekends, out on the road, dealing with the public, getting up at 430 etc through all this. Like I say some of his colleagues have died. TFL has been v badly hit, mainly bus drivers. It's not trivial for those who kept at it even when it started.

What would you rather they were called?

People doing their job.

I'm a nurse and frankly you can keep your 'key worker' and 'hero' and shove it up your arse. NHS have just come out of a pay freeze from austerity and just about to enter another one to pay for covid.

All I want is the supplies, staff and recognition required to do my job properly. I don't want to jump the queue at Tesco's or get a free sample size of hand cream.

I hate the term 'hero' as it implies I signed up to risk the safety of myself and my family, working with no PPE (early into lockdown my trust banned masks unless you were directly treating a known covid patient and then were amazed / horrified at the staff who caught covid and are now antibody positive in droves).

I knew the weekly clap for carers would soon be forgotten and would turn into a cry of its not fair as we seem to be getting 'special treatment'. Direct your anger at where it belongs - the government. It's their fault the NHS was a house of cards that the extra pressure of covid would collapse. It's their fault schools are so cut the bone their isn't teachers / space to safely teach EVERYONES children. They have cut and cut and cut public services and will continue to do so because now they have to 'pay for the pandemic.

TL:DR direct your anger where it's due, not at the friend of a friend on Facebook that got a free cookie from Costa because she can call herself a key worker.

Wow confused you are totally missing the point. It's not long shifts themselves that are the issue, it's what happens during these long shifts.

Death isn’t a new thing, death has always been present, yes watching people die with Covid, is harrowing, not having their families loved ones beside them etc... no one with an ounce of empathy would disagree with this.

McMillan nurses do this daily (without the PPE normally) for sometimes weeks, months on end then move to their next terminally ill patient. 24/7, also doing DNAR’sbon young individuals.

Hospice facilities do this everyday also, unfortunately.

Forensic teams have to deal with some pretty awful shit, but it’s a job that needs doing.

I absolutely don’t agree that anyone should be without PPE (which I believe has been vastly improved as numbers are dwindling and more manufacturers are now helping more)

I absolutely don’t believe any worker directly dealing with Covid should be put at harms risk, the treatment of care homes has been a national disgrace and the majority have had no PPE.

All of the above work is extreme horrible circumstances of the profession we choose, pandemics aren’t new, we were always acutely aware of them, secretly hoping it would never be in our life time, treating people dying is never going to be a easy ride, weather they are dying of Covid, car accident, terminal illness, dying at any age is horrendous for all involved however unfortunately that side of the job is something you did sign up for.

The management (government and hospitals) side of everything that involves Covid has monumentally been a clusterfuck!

There is key workers out their who take the “key worker” “frontline” worker to a whole new level, most workers are simply doing their job however in some horrible conditions.

I'm not a hero, nor should I be treated as such. I worry that the hero mantra detracts from the reality that we are normal people, who require safe working conditions (ie PPE, psychological support, decent working conditions)

I absolutely agree with this. You need to help help you your PTSD ASAP, I’m currently awaiting treatment after a relapse, try and get on the waiting list ASAP.

@HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend

You have missed the point re death.

Yes death is a part of medicine and nursing but not in the numbers seen during covid. The lack of dignity during death is one issue. Not being able to see or touch family members, nursing from behind uncomfortable PPE where it is hard to establish the same connection. Not one bad shift but day, after day, after day. Seeing young, previously healthy people die from a new disease that you or your colleagues could be next. Knowing many deaths could have been preventable had the government acted differently.

I support children who are dying in my role and it is always distressing. My peace is made that despite the worst thing in the world happening for a parent, that we could allow the child and family a dignified and peaceful death, surrounded by the people they love. Compare that to the scenes on intensive care with patients with covid

I think many key workers - in the sense it’s been said over lockdown - are the ones who have been at direct risk of catching Covid off others such as Carers, nursery staff, nurses etc but are generally badly paid and disregarded as important by society. It’s helped make others aware that those in poorly paid work for the responsibility their role entails are essential.

Unfortunately the public and the government have short memories.

No I agree Fluffymulletstyle

NHS workers and anyone doing a role that is requiring you going above and beyond your “job criteria” should be getting all aspects of support in allowing them to do their job safely and competently.

I personally don’t believe it’s only the NHS good above and beyond during this pandemic, and if anyone says otherwise we automatically get “shot down”, their are other essential roles that also need childcare and support etc...

I don’t believe or agree the hype around “front line workers” or “key workers” as a front line worker myself.

However I don’t blame individuals for thinking that way, the government is to blame for that, I do however blame some individuals for their “superior” attitude in thinking they should automatically get these privileges when they only work 1 day a week and immerse themselves in all the hype.

We all know people like this.

There's a furniture ad on TV at the minute thanking everyone for being a key worker so they've got a sale on to say thank you!

DFS by any chance? I swear they have been having a costant 'must end soon!' amazing sale since I was old enough to see a TV/hear radio. So at least 30 odd years now.