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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A try on or something else?

32 replies

hunkyfunkymunky · 17/06/2020 20:57

Evening all, I'm a guy, late 50's and until a couple of months ago, in a relationship with a female in her mid 50's. We got on fine and had a lot of fun, until one day she seemed a bit off with me, I asked if there was a problem, I was told, "no". A couple of hours later, I asked again and got the same reply.
It was Sunday night when I dropped her off and she handed me an envelope and said, "can you read that when you get home"? I nodded, said goodnight and drove home.
I got in the house, made a drink and opened the envelope, it was an invoice for £420 to cover 6 sessions at a physiotherapist for a thigh strain. I was stunned and had to read it again. It was only 9pm, so I tried to call her, she didn't answer, I sent a text and email, but heard nothing back that night.
After several attempts the next day, she eventually answered her phone, before I'd even said hello, she piped up, "when are you going to pay me my money"? I said, "what's this all about"? she then claimed I'd hurt her thigh when we were having sex and that's what she'd paid at the clinic. She'd never mentioned this to me at all, nor had she shown any pain, discomfort, discernible limp or inability to stop any activity at the weekend. I told her I wasn't paying and she got right ratty, I told her I was hanging up and did so.
She's tried being nice and goody goody, but I ain't falling for it, now, she cannot call or text me, as I've blocked her.
A signed for letter arrived today, I opened it, and saw that she'd gone to a solicitor for advice and it was outlined in the letter that I was to pay £420 or face court proceedings. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I'm a member of UNITE the union, so I'm going to call tomorrow for advice. This is beyond ridiculous, how can she prove that I hurt her, she's never indicated any distress to me, so why try is on now?

This is just plain weird. Should I just ignore it?

OP posts:
CastleCrasher · 17/06/2020 21:04

Good luck to her, even if it was caused during consensual sex, she can't sue you for it! Confused

CastleCrasher · 17/06/2020 21:05

Tell her to jog on. Shes being ridiculous

Cfmcg900 · 17/06/2020 21:15

Please laugh. She’ll have to pay for a medical report (far beyond the cost of the physio) to substantiate the injury is as a result of the sex, and the chances of such an injury is so so remote no consultant worth their salt would put their name to it.

She’s at it. She thinks a sols letter will bully you into paying. I’d personally reply to the solicitor saying you’re absolutely not entertaining this nonsense any further correspondence they send pre-lit will be ignored. You save any further “warning” letters irritating you this way, and there’s a record of your clear position early on.

You’ll be entitled to free half hour legal advice via unite, do so if you want to be reassured. You will no doubt become a sols memorable story Grin

Sorry you came across such a knob of a human.

Cheeringmeup · 17/06/2020 21:16

That's completely ridiculous, she's hoping you'll just pay up to avoid any fuss. No chance she'll get that to court, never mind win!

londongirl12 · 17/06/2020 21:37

Do you think the invoice is genuine? Or is she just trying to get money out of you?

hunkyfunkymunky · 17/06/2020 22:24

Thank you all for the replies, I've checked that the solicitor exists and it does, but the letter to me, looks like someone has done a bit of "copy and paste" from the website and made up a document, There is a reference number on the letter, so I've emailed the solicitor and included the ref number, so I hope someone gets back to me tomorrow.
If this is a set up and I firmly believe it is, she could end up in a big hole of shit for using a stolen image and falsely trying to obtain money by deception.

Tomorrow is another day.

OP posts:
TreeTopTim · 18/06/2020 00:58

Sounds like someone is trying it on.

hunkyfunkymunky · 18/06/2020 12:26

Hi all, an update from me, I called Unite this morning and got some advice, I was advised to avoid any interaction with her and her so called "legal team", I did tell them I'd already sent an email to her solicitor, quoting the reference number and asking for information, (but I've had no reply yet). Unite have created a file and have given me a reference number to quote in the event of anymore correspondence. I've to send them anything else that arrives, either by email or I can post copies to them. Apart from that, I can ignore anything in the way of phone calls, as there's no proof of anything being said, not that I'm going to answer any calls from a number I don't know.
So, from here forward, I'm not going to worry or allow myself to get upset because of this bizarre situation, why should I? I've done nothing wrong.

I thought my ex was warped and nasty, but this one is madder than a cement mixer full of drunk monkeys.

OP posts:
londongirl12 · 18/06/2020 19:31

It is the most bizarre story!! Hopefully you hear no more from her

STAYTHEFUCKHOME · 18/06/2020 19:35

Whilst everything is fresh in your memory, write down dates and times as well as you can remember. In fact, email it to yourself so it’s time stamped.

So when she handed it you, last had sex, when you blocked her etc.

I can’t see this going any further, but if it does, it might help you in the future.

Didntwanttochangemyname · 18/06/2020 19:39

You sound really level headed and I'm glad you've taken positive action. Your ex sounds absolutely crackers!

Notthetoothfairy · 18/06/2020 20:20

Perhaps send a screenshot of the letter to the lawyers’ managing partner, that will soon get them to confirm or deny it came from them! Agree the claim sounds absolutely ridiculous!

Windyatthebeach · 18/06/2020 20:23

Please please invoice her for excessive wear and tear of your penis...

heartsonacake · 18/06/2020 20:27

This is ridiculous; she’s definitely trying it on. Let her thrown her tantrum; she won’t get anywhere.

AuntieDolly · 19/06/2020 11:51

I think you should put that on your dating profile! Wink

Lockdownhairdontcare · 19/06/2020 12:05

What a loon!

hunkyfunkymunky · 19/06/2020 20:45

I think you should put that on your dating profile!

If I put some of the funny events that have occurred while dating, I'll look like the loon, with a current husband turning up on my first date, to being arrested for being in a house while the police did a drugs raid, to the woman who was a dominatrix and forgot she had a customer in the downstairs toilet and when I went to the loo, here he was, naked, bound and gagged.

I'd better not mention any of this.;)

OP posts:
SunbathingDragon · 19/06/2020 20:49

@hunkyfunkymunky

I think you should put that on your dating profile!

If I put some of the funny events that have occurred while dating, I'll look like the loon, with a current husband turning up on my first date, to being arrested for being in a house while the police did a drugs raid, to the woman who was a dominatrix and forgot she had a customer in the downstairs toilet and when I went to the loo, here he was, naked, bound and gagged.

I'd better not mention any of this.;)

Once you start mentioning those along with the woman who invoices you, it all starts to sound less believable.
NinkiNonkiNikau · 19/06/2020 21:16

You seem to have bad luck with your love life

hunkyfunkymunky · 19/06/2020 21:59

Once you start mentioning those along with the woman who invoices you, it all starts to sound less believable.

I'm not a liar, never have been and never will be, it's as true as I'm sat here. I've no need to embellish anything I say.

OP posts:
Nsky · 19/06/2020 22:04

What a mad woman, ignore !
It’s bad that she tarnishes so many others with her antics

LizB62A · 19/06/2020 22:19

Did you hear back from the solicitor?
That's such a bizarre thing for someone to do Smile

Sounds like you had a lucky escape....

hunkyfunkymunky · 20/06/2020 10:11

Morning all, so far, I've heard nothing, nothing at all, mind you, the postman hasn't been yet. If there is a solicitor involved, it might be a case of them saying nothing and keeping their powder dry, so to speak.
I'm no longer worried or care, she can go and do one.

OP posts:
Windyatthebeach · 20/06/2020 10:29

Please remember op that a solicitor will write a letter containing pretty much anything. Doesn't mean a thing..
My exh had one sent to me demanding I remove my newly fitted blinds as he could no longer spy into my house.. Obviously I ignored it.. During our court hearing no judge demanded it...
Ignore and ignore op. If a solicitor applied for a court hearing he would be ridiculed..

Bolllox · 22/06/2020 17:44

woman who was a dominatrix and forgot she had a customer in the downstairs toilet and when I went to the loo, here he was, naked, bound and gagged.

I know I'm a few days late here, but crikey mate, give us a break! Sounds like the script for a poorly funded porno.