To ask if I report this or not

[somersetblanket]

Name changed for obvious reasons.

At the weekend I was out very late at night for a walk as I work strange shifts and was taking my dogs out.

I bumped in to an acquaintance outside of her home. She was very obviously drunk. We chatted for a few minutes before her partner called her inside as he was going to do "lines" and she'd better hurry up before it was all gone. (I don't think he realised I was there.) I knew from our conversation she had her 1 year old baby at home, along with her partner. She mentioned the baby was sleeping and she wasn't looking forward to the morning wake up call - it was 2am at this point. She said her partner wouldn't even stir when the baby cried after all the "booze and a good time."

I walk in a circle so passed by her home again about half an hour later and could hear her rowing with her partner, lots of shouting from her and although I couldn't make out what they were saying it sounded intense.

It's been bothering me for the last couple of days about the drugs and alcohol while in charge of such a young child. I have no idea if it's something I should flag up with someone and if so, who? I don't know what their circumstances are or whether it was a one off or an every day occurrence. I've seen her in passing since and tried to ask how she was, to offer help if she needed it, but she brushed me off.

WIBU to report these parents? If so, to who? Or AIBU and it's not my business how they spend their weekends.

@StormzyInaDCup

I would have thought that was obvious. Forced drug tests with no basis?

Report. People like that shouldn’t have kids.

You would be happy to be compelled to give blood, hair and urine samples because of one person's statement and no other evidence?

@TinyPigeon

Thankfully one person's report cannot force a drug test for the woman. So there is no 'evidence'. Froth much?

What is wrong with you?

Nothing? I live in the real world where so, so many people take drugs. And social services can't compel a drugs test because of one busybody. But froth away if you want to, you're only deluding yourselves.

@ohoneohtwo but there is a basis! If that report crossed my desk, I'd ask as social worker to carry out checks. Potentially an assessment, dependant on what they found.

You have a one year old child, two parents unable to attend to the child in an emergency through potential drink and drug use and reports of the parents arguing.

Some drug users are able to parent, some aren't. I'd personally like to know which before a child was harmed and that's on the miniscule amount of info given.

but there is a basis! If that report crossed my desk, I'd ask as social worker to carry out checks. Potentially an assessment, dependant on what they found.

I was specifically talking about drugs tests with no reason other than a report. Forced drug testing based on nothing was the context.

Report please. That's an uncomfortable situation.

Children living with heroin addict parents is a rarity. Parents stable on a script is common but really not the same thing at all.

100% report this. We are all responsible for safeguarding.

There isn't forced drug testing. It's often requested and parents engaging with drug counsellors are asked to give urine screens.

Hair strand testing is usually only done in care proceedings. Sometimes in pre proceedings but that is voluntary. Even in proceedings the parent can refuse it.

Apologies if we crossed wires @ohoneohtwo.

No one would force a drug test at that point, no. And nor should they. There's basis to ask for one of course.

So if it's a random one off you condone that. Lovely.
But if it's a pattern and reporting this multiple times could lead to SS escalating the matter to an authority who could actually take further action with drug tests, the result of which could lead to even more further action that could help the child in this situation? OP might not come across this particular circumstance again in order to make further reports.
I apologise if my concern for the child doesn't factor in to your bureaucracy of the situation you read in the OP.
Weirdly enough I had the view that you don't take illegal substances while responsible for a child. The same way adults shouldn't drink to excess while responsible. Mixing the two? Ah fuck it eh? Why report that?

So if it's a random one off you condone that. Lovely.

I don't condone drug taking at all.

Weirdly enough I had the view that you don't take illegal substances while responsible for a child. The same way adults shouldn't drink to excess while responsible. Mixing the two? Ah fuck it eh? Why report that?

I share your view. The reality however is that lots of parents do this. Lots of children live with users and addicts.

OP WTF obviously report 🙄