To move to Dubai

[mrsfury]

Hi everyone! I've probably posted in the wrong place, so sorry if I have!

Just wanted to hear from anyone who lives/lived in Dubai. DH has been offered a great job out there with his current company. We're both young (30) and DD is nearly 1 so wouldn't be taking her out of school or anything like that.

Any information/opinions etc would be greatly received!

I have lots of friends who live there and absolutely love it, the ex pat lifestyle is great. If DP could move his job there easily like I could I’d love to go.
However Dubai is hated on Mumsnet so be aware this will influence the replies you get.

Going to watch this one very closely I'm also keen to know!

Go for it! But with your eyes open. If offers a great lifestyle and is a playground for everyone. It is so easy for all your money to disappear. Commit to saving what you would have otherwise paid in tax. Then have a fantastic time on the rest. You will meet more people that you ever have in your life and friendships will be much easier to create than in UK. Most people are there without family and they have friends instead who become like family. I felt like I started to live again when I moved there as life didn't finish when you come home from work. You can be entertained somewhere different every day of the week and not cover all the places ever!

There is discrimination and racism and both are open and permitted; you will experience modern day slavery; there is no freedom of speech, no social security, big brother watches you all the time

But live by the rules of Dubai and you will be fine

Had a fantastic 7.5 years there and came back kicking and screaming as I wanted the kids to finish their education in UK. But loved every minute of our Dubai adventure

Hmm @mrsfury there is a forum on Talk for this:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/living_overseas

but you wouldn't get all that lovely traffic... so I'll bite.

I've lived in Dubai for a while and if you're young, outgoing, like meeting new folk, up for a challenge etc, then it's great. Forget anyone who tells you it's a "dry" country where the police are waiting to throw you in jail - as long as you drink in the public bars and hotels where it's allowed, and you don't go off piste and do stupid stuff acting like it's Benidorm, then you're fine. If you're the kind of person who wants to pick up the metaphorical traffic cone and strip to your undies and have a run around with it on your head, then it is clearly not for you.

The tax free element, combined with silly-cheap petrol, means you can get addicted (so to speak) to the lifestyle you can get in Dubai compared to living in Britain. The trick is to save money where you can and make your decision about whether you want to go full native so to speak, or whether it's a stop along the way for you. My friend with her Dodge Challenger, big apartment, home help, isn't about to come back anytime soon to Berkshire where she lived before, where she could probably afford a 1-bed and a Fiesta on the equivalent salary.

It's not a playground for its legions of indentured workers chopc.

We have family there

Salary is tax free
There is a hierarchical system. Locals are treated better. Different health care for them. Non locals cannot buy houses (they can in certain areas with caveats).
South Asians that are economic migrants there are treated shabby. Our relative treated a few dumped in hospital having fallen from tall buildings doing labourer work.
Most recruiters will cover rent and staff including a nanny if required.
Alcohol is technically banned but still happens in bars and hotels
Locals tend to shop as a pastime
Expats will do things like going to the beach and to water parks.
It's hot. Average temp in cooler months is 25 degrees .
There is not much culturally going on. Not many museums, theatre etc
No world class universities/higher education etc.
It's a place to go earn lots for a short period and to head back.

DH could earn 4x the amount he earns here but refuses for all of the above.

Good luck

Read up on the human rights abuses in Dubai and then decide whether you want to support a regime like that.

The wiki article is a good start

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_rights_in_Dubai

Do it. I was there for 2 years and on and off in other places in the Gulf for about 10 years together. Just see it as being in a bubble....the expat life isn't real life and the return to normality can be quite difficult.

I d do it if it was for a few years with a clear end date. Wouldn't stay there for too long though.

The first question is have you been there before? We were in a similar position and thinking of moving there for work - the financial rewards do make it tempting. Went for a short break and absolutely hated it. I know some people love it though and it’s personal preference but for the reasons PPs have stated it wouldn’t work for us (so particularly treatment of certain workers, limited culture and things to do - great if you like shopping at massive multinational chains and going to the water park, not great if you like anything else, have to drive everywhere...) If you haven’t been then go for a short break when you can to get a feel for it!

I do think you have to ask yourself very seriously if you can live with financially benefitting from the exploitation and enslavement of other people. You shouldn’t just put that aspect from your mind; you should think very seriously about whether you could live with yourself.

For gods sake don’t ask this here! I was there for 15 years, along with some other gulf countries. Kids born there, met DH there etc. It is much, MUCH more expensive to live there than you will realise. Ensure your schooling and healthcare (gold standard) are included. Rents are currently coming down, but the cost of living is high. We came back with plenty of savings, but Dubai will help you spend your money.

And to the poster who had never lived there who claimed there is ‘nothing much culturally going on...’ - bollocks. As someone who worked in the arts there, I’m inclined to disagree. There is lots to see and do - you just have to go and do it! My social life was was, WAY better in the Middle East than it is back here.

Go and enjoy yourself, and come back when you stop saving, would be my advice.

I'm pretty sure the economy is in free fall in Dubai, I would make sure the position is super secure before moving. Do you work or have any particular career aspirations? I found it really difficult to find work in my field in Dubai. I grew to resent life there, it's all very shiny and nice but dull and repetitive at the same. If you love binge drinking and tanning you may enjoy it!

As a trailing spouse I found it very lonely. Most people are there only for a few years and so I found it hard to make any real friends. My social circle was like a "beggars can't be choosers" situation. Maybe it would be easier with a baby? Or maybe a lot harder? I'm not sure, I had no kids.

If it's gonna be a huge $$$ situation it may be worth it. If you have a strong community where you are and are making good $$ I would hesitate. It may be hard to reintegrate back into ur old community.

Also your spouse will probably be working crazy hours and networking a ton so don't expect it to be a great family adventure. it will probably be you and the baby alone most of the time.

Think hard about your personality and if you're a social butterfly or not. Think about the social support you have now, and how it will feel to start from scratch. Think about your career, if you will be out of work there, and you want a career, don't move.

DH was offered a lucrative post there in the early 2000s but we didnt go. I was worried about raising daughters in a country that had applalling attitudes towards women and terrible human rights record. Im sure its possible to turn a blind eye to these, live in a Western bubble and play by their rules but it didnt sit easy with me even though the money was very tempting. I would second looking at their human rights record and attitude to towards woman before deciding if thats the society you want to live in, also makes sense to go there in holiday before making life-changing decisions

I also work in the arts, and when I lived there there was nothing but a third-rate film festival, the beginnings of a spoken word poetry scene and some bad galleries in Al Quoz. It’s a surveillance-heavy, environmentally-disastrous dictatorship with heavily-censored media, and a poor human rights record, which it is increasingly extending to its own citizens who agitate for democracy, not ‘just’ immigrant workers under the exploitative khafala system. Unfortunately, a particular type of ‘I’m All Right, Jack’ Brit seems to find it perennially attractive because of tax-free salaries, hot weather, cheap petrol and cheap domestic labour.

Thank you everyone! This is all exactly the information I was looking for. To answer some of your questions

No we have never been to Dubai before
We currently live outside of the uk but in Europe and to be honest I'm really fed up of it here (been here 10 years we met here both expats) V small island and not a lot to do and we've been thinking of moving back to uk now we have dd. Anyway this job offer has come up and I'm not opposed to moving there I just don't really know much about what life would be like as an expat over there.

Ideally I don't want to move to Dubai to just stay a few years and then go to uk, for me it's a long term thing so want to make sure we make the right decision.
Moved here when I was 20 with a friend for the summer season and never went back and it's been great but it's time to move on.

Im not exactly career driven, DH is a much higher earner but I would like to work as I always have, but I'm quite happy in admin/reception something like that I'm not too fussy!

Dubai is one of those countries imo where you live for a year , save lots and then come home.
Imo, definitely not a forever country to live in

If you're comfortable with your luxury and enjoyment being gotten from another humans oppression/slavery then I suppose you'll be ok. If not, I wouldn't.

As the poster above said the economy is massively suffering at the moment, 70% of companies are due to fail within 6 months. Unless your DH is in Insolvency practice I wouldn’t go now.

Hell no. How about reading around Latifa and Shamsa and then make an informed decision.

The climate alone would put me off. Yes there’s air con but it’s still not pleasant for huge chunks of the year.

Then of course there’s the ugly fact that the city is built on the modern equivalent of slavery.

No thanks.

I don't know many people who stayed long-term. I think 90% of western expats come for 2-6 years for the $$ and jump when their kids are a bit older.

In regards to admin/reception work, tbh I idk if they really hire western expats for that anymore. It's cheaper to hire a phillipino or Arab (not uae-unless they are looking for emiratization points) woman. The pay probably wouldn't be worth your time. If you can train as a teacher that is paid well and you can easily get a job as a native English speaker. I had a friend who got teaching certificate from American university Dubai and was able to teach after that.

Maybe its different with kids, but I found it totally lacking in community, unless maybe if you are part of a church or something. There are good sport clubs, but again I find the constant turnover of ppl kind of depressing. but if you're already an expat you may be able to adjust easily.

My mate teachs there. Obvs a bit different this year but it empties out completely from June to Sept due the heat. Most people go home for the summer. Something to think about of you are planning on all year round.