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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Colleague took credit - would you say something?

121 replies

Corporatejargon · 15/06/2020 11:11

Just that. Passed off an important piece of work as their own pretty much, no acknowledgement of the fact I had done the bulk of the research and work. Received all praise. Was so shocked and due to circumstances there wasn’t the chance to say anything when it happened.

Would you say something, or not, to either manager/the colleague for fear of being petty/bitter?

For context - male colleague, about 10 years older but no more senior position wise.

Vote yes - say something
Vote no - leave it, petty

OP posts:
BobbieDraper · 15/06/2020 12:50

@KitKat1985

She cant do that now. She said she was there when the other guy took credit but was too incensed to speak up right then. She cant then send an email saying "oh, just wondering what you thought of my report". She will look like an idiot.

Poppinjay · 15/06/2020 12:58

You want to sound like a colleague with a useful point to make, not a snitch.

@DollyDoneMore, maybe you could suggest some alternative wording then?

Thisismytimetoshine · 15/06/2020 12:59

Who was actually tasked to work on the project? It's odd that your (plural) manager is so out of the loop?

cunningartificer · 15/06/2020 13:00

The fear of being thought a snitch, undiplomatic etc is one of the hazards of speaking up. I really changed my attitude at work after reading “Lean In” and realising that men often don’t get this level of anxiety about setting the record straight. Be professional and straightforward. This man is treating your colleagues as fools as well as you by allowing them to believe he did all the work. It’s fraudulent. Your boss actually needs to know as people often do this when they are under stress and it’sa gateway rationalisation to more serious fraud.

GirlCalledJames · 15/06/2020 13:02

I’ve been in your position and said something.

MzHz · 15/06/2020 13:05

How exactly did this colleague claim your work? was it in an email? meeting?

I think an email to him is a good idea and that if he doesn't correct the misunderstanding that you will.

Eckhart · 15/06/2020 13:06

@DollyDoneMore

You want to sound like a colleague with a useful point to make, not a snitch

The fact that a team member is taking credit for other people's work is a useful point to make.

Hushabusha · 15/06/2020 13:09

My sister worked somewhere on a temporary basis and organized a thing. Co-worker printed out the itinerary, waved it around and said "here's the plan for X thing".
When interviews were held for the next year, stealing colleague got the job

CharityDingle · 15/06/2020 13:10

Definitely speak up. Worked with a manager like that, I reported to her. She was slightly caught out one day at a meeting involving her manager, and me. It was clear from something he said, that she had taken credit for a big piece of work I had done. She had to say, 'oh it was you who did all of that', because I happened to be there.

I don't know what is the best way to tackle it, but definitely do something now. Strike while the iron is hot.

HannaYeah · 15/06/2020 13:11

Definitely say something to manager and colleague.

I’d call colleague today and say “Bob I noticed you didn’t acknowledge that I did x,y,z on this project while you were accepting all of the high praise for the outcome. Why is that?”

Then let him squirm a bit and say, “Can we agree going forward if we work together on something to make certain the other person’s contributions are not swept under the rug?”

dontdisturbmenow · 15/06/2020 13:14

The best way to do it is to wait for the opportunity like big boss refering to the job our colleague did as an example to apply and you can they go in with a 'yes I'm glad he included all the bits I suggested in his report' and wait for the 'oh, did you contribute to it, I didn't know' and you can seize your opportunity to explain what you've done.

When asked why you didn't say anything then, you can say that you didn't want to undermine him.

Notjustamum10 · 15/06/2020 13:14

Another vote for Haffdonga's email here. It is straightforward and non-confrontational. I've also experienced similar, and find that colleagues / bosses / clients are also sometimes surprised at who gets credit for a particular piece of work and are happy to acknowledge the wider team once this is pointed out.

Hercwasonaroll · 15/06/2020 13:14

I was in a similar position. I challenged the guy and he completely didn't get it. He thought it was genuinely acceptable to pass it off as his own. At that point I took it higher and someone had a conversation with him.

DrDreReturns · 15/06/2020 13:15

Yep say something. Your colleague is a cheeky fucker.

Disfordarkchocolate · 15/06/2020 13:17

Nothing petty and be clear about what he actually did contribute but make it very clear to your manager that you were by far the main contributor. If you think this is petty then you need to change your attitude at work.

Jaxhog · 15/06/2020 13:25

Write the note as some have suggested and bcc. your boss.

monkeyonthetable · 15/06/2020 13:27

100% you should. Be businesslike about it - just let the project manager know which bits you were responsible for.

Eddielzzard · 15/06/2020 13:28

I would email or zoom manager. Letting this go will do nothing for your self respect and will be a green light for this CF wanker to carry on. You ARE NOT A PUSHOVER. What a complete arse.

FairNotFair · 15/06/2020 13:29

Some years ago, my line manager took me aside for a serious talk. He was concerned because X in another department had taken it upon himself to write material for our end users, cutting my team out of the process. X had justified his actions by saying that our material just wasn't good enough. Naturally my manager was annoyed, not only at X's high-handedness, but also because my team and I were clearly not doing our jobs properly - and because X was getting a lot of praise for his great work.

I took a glance at this "great work". Every single bit was archived material that I had written. X had just dragged it out of the files and changed the titles.

Vodkacranberryplease · 15/06/2020 13:36

I would 'pop my head around the door' of boss and afl for a quick chat. Say you want to ask for their opinion on something. Then explain what happened and say you don't want to make a big deal of it but you've thought about it and you are not comfortable. What do they think you should do?

Explain that it's not about the one off but your overall career. That it's the thin end of the wedge. Then they will say do x or whatever but now they know.

Then I'd corner the thief and ask for an quick word' and confront it very briefly but clearly. With something like 'look I know you helped out at the end but that was my work. I know it's not a big deal, but it kind of is. We have to work together so let's make sure it doesn't happen again' then leave it.

Don't go all HR/official or create work for your boss it's not the right environment. Just put the colleague on notice and make sure your boss knows. Then at some point in future if that work is being discussed you can jump in with 'actually such and such I can probably speak to that as I was responsible for that part'. There might be more questions which of course you can answer. At the end it will be clear you did the work.

Or you could just go to whoever the work was for and ask if they had any questions do you need to explain anything would they like you to add anything etc. You look helpful, you know what you are doing because it's your work and it's clear colleague was lying even though the only one you told wax your boss.

Durgasarrow · 15/06/2020 13:42

I think it would be very appropriate to raise this issue. It would even be reasonable to raise it at a meeting. "I would like to circle back to something that came up recently. How to address the issue of what happens when we work on projects and one person takes credit for the work...

copycopypaste · 15/06/2020 13:51

You could always play it slightly differently.

You could say to your manager that this has happened and you'd like advice on how to approach it with your colleague as you don't want to create a bad atmosphere. That way it's less about dobbing her in (although I think she deserves it), and more about asking your boss how to play it, whilst still letting them know it happened

monkeymonkey2010 · 15/06/2020 13:58

I'd ask for feedback from the manager on my contribution to the project - put it in writing and list all that you did.
You put in 90% of the work and colleague put in 10%.....don't be the 'little woman' who stays quiet and allows men/others to walk all over her.

If you don't speak up and assert yourself - they will all see you as 'not worthy' of consideration for promotions or other opportunities that require personal strength and confidence.

dinosaurdee · 15/06/2020 14:00

I would 100% say something. I've been in this situation before and a few months later colleague received a pay rise quickly followed by a promotion.

DollyDoneMore · 15/06/2020 14:06

If you raise it with your colleague first, you are in a far stronger position. And though I would clarify what I’d said in writing, to have a “paper trail”, I would also begin the conversation as a conversation.

  1. You are offering your colleague the opportunity to rethink what he has done, apologise and put it right. You are being collegiate and altruistic in not “telling tales” unnecessarily and giving him the benefit of the doubt, to your credit. You are also asking your colleague to make a special point now of drawing extra attention to your hard work to your bosses and colleagues.

  2. If your colleague doesn’t do as you wish, you now in a better position to approach your boss. You have tried to sort it out yourself but your colleague is being doubly unreasonable. You are now asking your boss to sort out a dispute between equals, not to investigate your unilateral complaint.

This approach feels much more like how two adults sort things out and less like a parent/child relationship.

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