Is this normal?

[bipra21]

My partner had to get married in the 80's and seems to feel indebted to his adult DD in her thirties who is now married with 2 GK
She's seems selfish and entitled and when they split up she was upset I think this is because she lost her cash cow as her dad always paid for everything, she's used to having her own way.
I don't know why but she seems to have a hold over my partner and he's always scared to upset her and constantly asking her 'we are ok aren't we?' We got engaged last year and she still doesn't know in case it might offend her and I haven't got a ring yet he'll give her money for the GK and pay for stuff for them, granted it's his cash from jobs on the side but I feel they are more important than me. We've been together 2 years. He's asking for half his capital in the divorce, when she finds out I know she'll put pressure on him to back off because she'll not want her mum upset and I know he'll do that for the sake of his relationship with her. I'm trying to understand why she has this hold over him it didn't seem right to me?

Read the step threads, read the relationship threads.

You have a DP problem. Don’t let it become a DH problem.

She shouldn’t have this level of interference in her fathers life and he’s never going to stand up for himself or for you.

Walk away now. It’ll be the kindest thing you ever do for yourself

Why would you get engaged to a man not yet divorced, who you've been for only a year or so when you clearly disagree with his relationship with his kids?

It doesn't make much sense!

Did you have anything to do with the break up or meet him afterwards?

Was the break from his wife his choice or hers?

All could have a factor in how his relationship has developed with his daughter.

@welshpixie that makes sense, thank you for explaining.

It wasn't that long ago but it's a different world really I guess.

His wife got pregnant when she said she was on the pill, so he felt he had to do the right thing but her never loved her.
But he still by then until recently.
The DD is very materialistic always dropping hints for cash like x needs this, I have to buy that. She has a credit card debt, just like her mum, he's always bailed them out she's resentful hes not doin that as much maybe?