Advice please school application!

[HTT10]

Hi everyone! I have name changed for this...

So DD goes to school sept 21, so I will have to apply this year and have been looking at schools, we wanted to move but with everything going on it is looking less likely and we currently live in quite a stuck up area, we keep to ourselves but DH speaks to all the neighbours in passing and all get along fine!

Now here is the AIBU part, DH is a traveller / gypsy he was raised in that life style but saw a lot of awful things and moved out when he was young but even so he wants DC to know about that culture and wants me to put on DD school application that she is from the gypsy community!

He also says that although he wants DD to have a good education he will not stop going down south to see his family and may want to do this once in the school year so we have to tell them so they will be more lenient!

For me I don't care about people knowing DH is a traveller, I am an adult and can handle the judgemental eyes when it is mentioned! But it would break my heart to see someone judge DC over this!

When I try and talk to DH he says I shouldn't be ashamed of what my DC are 🤷🏻‍♀️

I don't think its particularly relevant for school application per se.

Though you may want to choose a school that is strong on anti-bullying (deeds not words).

Surely he can take your DD to visit in the 6 weeks school holidays?

It's been a while since I applied for a primary place but does this have any bearing on allocations?

Are you concerned about getting the place or attendance once your dd starts school?

Aren’t you too late to apply for a place for this year?

I woulddn,t put it on.

Felicity, she's not too late for 2021.
I don't think that it's relevant op. The school won't care either way.
(Word has it, they've got a lot on their hands at the moment).

I wasn’t sure @Elizabeth thanks, I’m not familiar with the English school system of applying for places.

If her wants to take her to specific 'traveller events' (I am thinking of things like Appleby Horse Fair - apologies if I have the name of that event wrong) then to apply for authorized absence in term time it would help to have that as her 'ethnic' group on her records.
Usually schools will only give permission for children to have time off in term time for religion or cultural events where the date is specific. They can sometimes ask for proof to confirm its a genuine event. So if a child known to be from a Muslim family requests Eid as a day off it will usually be granted as the date of Eid is always well known. However if you randomly say you belong to an obscure church that you have never mentioned before and say you need a day off for the founders birthday or something they can ask for proof such as a letter from the Pastor.
Schools are usually good at respecting when a child may be off school due to religion and cultural events but they really do need to know that a child is part of that community.
However it will only be the relevant staff who will be aware she is 'Gypsy' if you put it on the form. No one else will need to be aware unless you want them to become aware.

However it will only be the relevant staff who will be aware she is 'Gypsy' if you put it on the form. No one else will need to be aware unless you want them to become aware

I live an area with a large settled traveller population (that might not be quite the right term) and my children all had/have travellers in their classes, everyone knows who they are.

I can't speak for all schools but ime it's not something that's a secret, obviously it might be different in your area but unless you're going to ask your dd to lie throughout her school life of course people will know why she's off a lot.

I still wouldn't worry about it at this stage, you've got months to do the application and over a year until you need to be thinking about what you put on the school information forms.

For normal applications it's not particularly relevant, however if you end up moving and applying for a place outside of the normal time, an 'in year application' then your application would most likely be heard under your local authority fair access protocol, which does give priority to Gypsy,Roma,Traveller families

@bookmum08 Thank you that has been very helpful!

@TerrapinStation Its not that I want her to lie abiut it, its more about the area we live in atm! People round here would probably turn their nose up if they knew DH background 🤔

They always would comment when DH parents come around if they saw them (not very often) usually along the lines of 'was that your DH parents 🧐'

I guess I just don't want anyone turning round to their DC and saying don't play with that little girl!

[quote HTT10]@bookmum08 Thank you that has been very helpful!

@TerrapinStation Its not that I want her to lie abiut it, its more about the area we live in atm! People round here would probably turn their nose up if they knew DH background 🤔

They always would comment when DH parents come around if they saw them (not very often) usually along the lines of 'was that your DH parents 🧐'

I guess I just don't want anyone turning round to their DC and saying don't play with that little girl! [/quote]
My point is that it doesn't matter what you do or don't put on a form it's going to be your DH's actions that the other children and parents will notice.

Realistically there's nothing you can do about the attitude of other parents, there are endless threads about similar issues on here, it can be for any number of reasons.

Rightly or wrongly if you don't want to cause an issue my advice would be to avoid term time absence, what would be the reason that she needs to be off during school time? Is there a reason family visiting can't be done at weekends and in the holidays?

What you put on your application will remain confidential.

It would be equally valid to say that your DD was from your community/heritage. Does that have to be sidelined infavour of his lineage?

@Aweebawbee I don't really have one! So hard to say x

LAs will often have a traveller education teacher (used to be a department but I doubt that I’d the case now). In the event of you wanting to travel as a part of that community, they will help to maintain provision through a base school and on-going education through you educating her while travelling. They will also liaise if they school you have chosen isn’t willing to work with the need for additional privacy while changing, for example.
What you put on the form wouldn’t be generally discussed, but would be used for school census etc. I work in a base school for a few travelling families- circus families mainly.