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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What CAN you do in your garden? (Sort of lighthearted)

29 replies

gardentrouble · 08/06/2020 23:48

So I have NC but I've been using MN for a while, and there seems to be a neighbour or garden related AIBU at least once a day.

OP will say that neighbours are doing something in their garden and ask if it's ok.

There seems to always be an overwhelming majority of responses saying that the neighbours are unreasonable, selfish, inconsiderate etc.

I've seen this with:

  • Playing music
  • Playing instruments
  • Children playing outside
  • Trampolines
  • Barbecues
  • Bonfires
  • Fire pits
  • Drinking
  • Cats
  • Pools
  • Hot tubs
  • Power washing things
  • Smoking
  • Being out past 10pm
  • Being out before 9am

Most of these things I thought were pretty commonplace but judging by some of the responses they are evil evil acts (so at least I'm learning Grin

So I'm asking, what ARE you actually allowed to do in your garden??

OP posts:
megletthesecond · 08/06/2020 23:50

Sit still and breathe quietly. That's about it Wink.

SierraHotel · 08/06/2020 23:58

You've missed dogs barking off your list. It is very comprehensive though!

BillywigSting · 09/06/2020 00:02

Anything you like really as long it's
A) not too loud
B) not smelly
C) actually stays within your garden

LST · 09/06/2020 00:04

YANBU OP. Its bloody nuts! Pointless having a back garden if all you are allowed to do in it is sit an whisper

BackforGood · 09/06/2020 00:09

P'r'aps not in the 'light hearted' vein, but generally I'd say 'be considerate' is the key, as it is in most places and situations in life.
What seems to be more of an issue on MN is the lack of tolerance and understanding in a lot of MNers that we are all different, and actually, there is likely to be some disturbance from your neighbours at various times, and that is part of living alongside other people.

BackforGood · 09/06/2020 00:12

Sorry, I've gone all sensible.
Time for bed I think

Molocosh · 09/06/2020 00:18

Garden. Grow flowers and veg, dig up weeds, watch bees, listen to birds. Read a book, sunbathe, watch Netflix with earphones in. DS plays out as long as he’s reasonably quiet. I wouldn’t allow a trampoline, they’re hideous and I don’t want to look at that out of my window.

BlessYourCottonSocks · 09/06/2020 00:21

Agree with many others. Do what you will in your garden provided it does not impinge on other people in any way. @Molocosh has it perfectly I think.

PorpentiaScamander · 09/06/2020 00:25

I must be really weird by MN standards. I dont care if my neighbours are loud between 9am-11pm. Have a bbq. Get a trampoline. Next doors DC practises her recorder in the garden most days. Her and her sister argue in a the garden
They also sing and laugh. I love hearing them.
It's no more than the parents listened to when my DC were small. (Other than the recorder)

Pinkbunny2811 · 09/06/2020 00:49

I must be a nightmare neighbour then. I've had bbqs, I've played music, I've laughed -shudder-, I've even chopped branches off a treeShock (I did tell my neighbours about the tree). My other neighbours often play music. I think I'm just lucky cause we have a little community and if we have any arguments we clear them up pretty quickly and help each other out a lot Smile

StarlightLady · 09/06/2020 04:53

I sunbathe topless in my garden, if someone goes to a lot of effort l can be seen. I’m sure l must have caused offence to someone peeking.

funinthesun19 · 09/06/2020 05:29

The first answer on the thread sums it up perfectly Grin

Don’t go reading a book to your child in the garden too. It’s very disruptive!

changedmynameforlockdown · 09/06/2020 07:00

@Molocosh has it..gardens are for gardening in, or sitting in..read, sunbathe, eating, children playing. Whatever you want provided you are not causing noise or smells your neighbours

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 09/06/2020 07:07

I think some people on mnet are unusually intolerant of normal levels of noise from children. Some threads on here made worried and I asked our neighbours to tell me if DS noise was any issue, they chortled and said it sounded like he was having a great time.

Defenestratethecat · 09/06/2020 07:16

Anything legal you want to do as long as you're not adversely affecting your neighbours. Use a bit of common sense and keep the music down, smoke your weed in your house (if you don't want your house stinking of weed what makes you think your neighbours want the stench drifting into their houses).

Kids playing out? Great. Kids playing out and screeching for hours? Not great.

Perhaps just think about how your behaviour affects others.

BestOption · 09/06/2020 07:22

I don't mind most of your list except music & smelly bonfires.

I don't mind (too much) children practising their instruments in the garden, but adults should know better.

Oh & I hate smoking...but as long as it's not constant then it's just one of those things you have to put up with.

But to add to your light hearted list

Eat
Drink
Read
Potter
Lay in the sun

Crafts (quiet ones)
Jigsaws
Board/card games (quietly)

JuneJuly · 09/06/2020 07:44

Poppy?

labazsisgoingmad · 09/06/2020 09:16

its all ok i have told my guinea pigs in their summer runs not to squeak loudly we do not want complaints about their wheeeeping and squeaking

gardentrouble · 09/06/2020 12:45

So I can dance around naked as long as it's silent dancing? Grin

Of course BackForGood I'm with you on the being considerate part Smile

OP posts:
gardentrouble · 09/06/2020 12:47

Crafts (quiet ones)

I'm really interested in what noisy crafts might be. Like rage knitting, or thrash-metal-decoupage?

OP posts:
NC10101 · 09/06/2020 12:48

Just to buck the trend, all I want to do in my garden is sit there quietly, reading or going on my phone or just having a sunbathe. At most I’d chat to someone else with me at a normal level. Isn’t this what most people do, most of the time? Doesn’t seem that unreasonable or insane to me

Somanysocks · 09/06/2020 12:50

Look at it through the closed window.

JellyfishandShells · 09/06/2020 12:51

Be considerate of others about your own actions and tolerant of others - not saying you have to be a doormat about really selfish behaviour but think moderation in all things.

Dreamersandwishers · 09/06/2020 12:58

@Somanysocks - can I come live next door to you ? 😉
One of my neighbours practises bagpipes 😂 Its quite atmospheric at times.

Catmummyof2 · 09/06/2020 13:13

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.