To be very pissed off with my friend?

[PyongyangKipperbang]

This is a guy who has considered himself to be social distancing if he shags his latest booty call from behind......

Last night I had a few and a mutual friend and I got a bit carried away (via video chat). Nothing serious, bit a laugh all is good. I told my friend in a "Omg you wont believe what X and I did last night" kind of way, I thought he would roll his eyes and not judge as I dont judge him, even though I could.

He has turned into the fucking morality police! He is disappointed in us both, has gone on about how it ruins friendships which I guess it has but only because he is kicking off, and now he isnt speaking to me. Me and mutual friend are both single, no one got hurt, what is his problem?

I am really pissed off with him. He is being such a hypocrite.

[BacklashStarts]

He’s either sexist and has a massive double standard about what he can do vs. What you can do. Or, he wanted to be shagging you.

Or he’s just vying for a bit of drama and this provides.

[VapingHot]

I think you all simply sound ridiculous 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Unforgettablefire]

He’s jealous. Add this recent strange behaviour to the previous falling out with your ex = he’s in love with you. If it’s not love he seriously has the hots for you.

[NC10101]

Yeah I would imagine he likes you and is jealous

[Rubyroost]

Confused, how can you have sex over videochat?

[welcometohell]

Confused, how can you have sex over videochat?

Well, obviously you can't actually have sex. Like people use the phrase 'phone sex' but really it's just two people having a wank in their separate homes while they're on the phone, isn't it? Same thing with video chat.

[scheffsm]

This whole thing sounds ridiculous.
No idea why you told mutual friend about the video wanking. Some things are best kept to yourself and that's one of them.
Mutual friend is jealous.
Next time you'll know not to share stuff like that with him.

[justanotherneighinparadise]

Well it’s completely obvious he’s jealous isn’t it. How do you feel about that OP?

[MrsEricBana]

Yep, jealous.

[AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter]

To be honest, my view of 2 friends would change if one told me they'd both had a pissed up wank over videocall. I'd rather not know

I wouldnt either but I would certainly not scold them for it and stop speaking to them! Good grief- talk about overreaction.
I agree with PP- he's jealous because he wants you himself.

[livefornaps]

I am lost.

What did you do?! Had a video wank with one bloke and then called up another bloke to tell him about your wank?!

[Sparkletastic]

Sounds like he's into you.

[PyongyangKipperbang]

We talk about stuff like that, its how we are. I have other friends I wouldnt dream of telling, but tbh a video thing is very tame compared to some of his exploits so it never occured to me he would react like that.

How do I feel if he does have a thing about me? Sad. He is (or I thought he was) a good friend. He is younger than me and as I said, a player so while he would be ok for a FWB type thing, I'm not into that as I get emotionally involved and I wouldnt want to be involved with someone who I know would cheat on me. I think it would ruin the friendship, although it seems that it already has done.

[JudyCoolibar]

Tell him he knows perfectly well that he has done worse and that he needs to stop being such a hypocrite.

[zonkin]

I think he's probably pissed off that as a friendship group two of you have got more involved that friends normally do, which does change a friendship group. If you'd done it with someone who wasn't a mutual friend he probably wouldn't have cared.

On a different note, why did you tell him unless to cause drama and attention?

[Butterfly3105]

I think it would ruin the friendship, although it seems that it already has done

Don't worry about it he'll probably get over it!

[LouLouLoo]

He's jealous.

You didn't do anything wrong and I don't think it's strange to discuss it with your friend either. My friends and I have had many a 'you'll never guess what/who I did last night chats' (in our single days).

[PyongyangKipperbang]

On a different note, why did you tell him unless to cause drama and attention?

Because its how we are. He has called me before just to talk about his latest adventures. We just have that kind of friendship. If I had thought for one second that it would have illicited any kind of response other than laughing and calling me a slapper, I wouldnt have told him.

[StillCoughingandLaughing]

I think the three of you should get together for a mass debate on the subject.

[PyongyangKipperbang]

I think the three of you should get together for a mass debate on the subject.

:o:o:o

I messaged him earlier and said "I dont know why you're being like this, talk to me I would like to sort this out" and he has read it but not responded so bollocks to him.

[Colom]

I wouldn't have sent that last message to him - don't pander to him. If he's a "player" like you said, then he's probably the type that wants all women to love him and gets annoyed when they focus on other men.

How did you friendship come about out of interest?

[PyongyangKipperbang]

Met him at work through someone else, but I have lived on the same road as his parents for 20+ years, weird coincidence. He moved away when he was 18 to join the army, only came back when his marriage ended. Due to the age difference, I didnt know him when we were younger.

[Thelnebriati]

the type that wants all women to love him and gets annoyed when they focus on other men.
Thats what needing a harem means, it doesnt mean you actually sleep with them. Men who need harems are usually narcs.

esteemology.com/the-narcissist-and-his-harem-why-you-should-decline-membership/

[SteveTheSpiderPlantKiller]

@Thelnebriati that link was really interesting!

[PyongyangKipperbang]

That article describes my ex husband to a tee. I have often referred to him as a people hoarder and I felt that my life with him was like being in a goldfish bowl as I was under scrutiny the whole time from his harem. Especially when we got married....what was so special about me when he had a string of women who would have been willing (and were desperate) to marry him? I was hated by everyone of his exes.

I didnt find this out until after we were married though.