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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Thankyou

57 replies

iamtheoneandonlyyy · 03/06/2020 21:16

I'm not the one and onlyyyyy as my name suggests. I've had another name on here for a while. I would change it from time to time for advice then hide the thread and ignore it.
When I first joined Mumsnet I thought a lot of posters would ask relationship advice and get told there partners were abusive and to leave. For what I considered fairly common things. Then I started to take it in a bit more. And I started to tell my partner that actually no. I'm not going to accept being called names, being criticised, being told off, not allowed to do anything my way. Because it's abusive. And the more I stuck up for myself, the far worse it got. And over the last while...really bad.
It's taken a lot to arrange and I won't say much but this morning I took barely any of our things and removed my children and me to safety. And here I am. Got beautiful kids in the room with me fast asleep and I'm here stressed to the hilt but relieved.
Long way to go. But, if u hadn't been on here reading posts for so long I honestly don't think I would've realised properly what was going on before it got too bad.
So, Thankyou
Thanks

OP posts:
LazyDaisy22 · 03/06/2020 22:08

Well done OP. Your new life starts now. Wishing you so much happiness for the future 💐

MuthaFunka61 · 03/06/2020 22:09

Well done you SmileStarFlowers

MrsMozartMkII · 03/06/2020 22:09

Very well done indeed lass!

A hug and a handhold.

dublingirl66 · 03/06/2020 22:10

Oh my gosh
This is amazing

Can echo your sentiments
Never understood what he was doing until he came on here

The poster who suggested I fake an emergency saved my life as he was ready to end my life that day

So many great people on here
Do keep us updated thinking of you and your innocent kids

My heart breaks also for all the innocent kids stuck in the middle of so many abuse relationships

Sending you so many hugs ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

cakeandchampagne · 03/06/2020 22:11

Star Well done!

Coolcatsandkittens · 03/06/2020 22:11

All the best OP, you got this Flowers

Trevsadick · 03/06/2020 22:12

Well done op. You could be me. My story is so similar. Even down to the part where it got worse and worse.

Without mn I would be still there. Or possibly dead. I seriously, contemplated ending it all several times. Mners got me through. Everything, they were there.

I am 4 years down the line. Its not been an easy road. Its important you know that incase you waver. Its normal to wobble. Its normal to wonder if you did the right thing. Or think 'was it really that bad'.

Its ok....because its so worth it!

Well done! I wish you every happiness for the future. And keep posting. Flowers

VortexofBloggery · 03/06/2020 22:15

Brave woman. Thanks for sharing your story, you are inspiring others ❤️ enjoy your kids.

NoseyfriendNC · 03/06/2020 22:24

I am so happy for you!! It might seem tough right now but I promise you you will look back on this and wish you had done it sooner. You and your children will go on to have amazing lives because of how strong you have been.

Beautiful3 · 03/06/2020 22:29

Well done op. I'm glad you and your beautiful children are now safe.

Fluffybutter · 03/06/2020 22:46

Amazing .
I really really mean that .
Your kids have a super strong mum and you should be massively proud of yourself .
Best of luck Flowers

dontlikebeards · 03/06/2020 22:50

Well done OP, this is the start of a wonderful and safe new life for you and your children.

OnlyLittleMissOrganised · 03/06/2020 23:03

Well done OP.

mayormaynot · 04/06/2020 04:20

Well done. That's is awesome. Xxx

Thedogscollar · 04/06/2020 08:28

Well done OP such a good and brave move. Domestic violence/abuse has massively increased during this pandemic so happy that you have seen this is not normal behaviour and taken yourself and your children to a safe and peaceful place.

Duckduckduck123 · 04/06/2020 08:36

Amazing, well done op Flowers

iamtheoneandonlyyy · 04/06/2020 19:19

It's not going well. Kids are massively struggling and so am I.

OP posts:
PinkiOcelot · 04/06/2020 19:33

Good for you OP. Onwards and upwards. Here’s to you new start 🍷xx

PinkiOcelot · 04/06/2020 19:35

I’m really sorry to hear that. Just think of the alternative. Things are going to be bumpy and frightening. You’re going to feel down and confused but you’ll get there and come out the other side. We’re all rooting for you xx

JackiFazaki · 04/06/2020 19:43

Talk to us some more, we are listening, you will get through this we promise x

SlimGin · 04/06/2020 19:50

Well done OP!Thanks
It's a cliche but 'today is the first day of the rest of you life' - this saying really helped me as did lots of mumsnetters!
It can be a tough road but keep coming back, there's a lot of good advice on these boards. You are so strong and you can do this!

Alyssum34456 · 04/06/2020 19:53

You're amazing!!

LookingForward6 · 04/06/2020 22:28

Sorry to hear it’s been a tough day. It would be easy to return now, but the abuse would get worse. You would be ground down, it’s going to be tough but you honestly have done the hardest part. The kids will come through it. Do you have any support in place with family, friends or Womens Aid?

AlCalavicci · 04/06/2020 22:37

You have made the 1st hard step , there will be more to come and there will be days of doubt but it will get better bit by bit .
The hard days will become further apart and the good days will be more often .
Is there anyone you talk to irl

tensmum1964 · 04/06/2020 22:55

Hang on in there. You have done the right thing and won't regret it in the long run. Wishing you and your beautiful children a future filled with hope xx

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