Outstayed

[Susan1961]

AIBU my partner moved in mine as his elderly mother was/is shielding since April. He lives with her due to various reasons. I had to ask for money for the bills, he buys food but only helps out if I ask. I want him to go back to his home, is it too soon?

Can you both self isolate entirely for a couple of weeks so he can go home without fear of infecting his mother?

Surely this should have been discussed before you agreed for him to move in? Seems a bit unreasonable for you to change your mind if you know he has no where to go other than back to his mother's and put her at higher risk of getting Covid.
In my opinion, he should be contributing but it depends on his income and how much he's paying to his mother...more than that, it depends on what you agreed, which appears to be nothing?

He said would I mind, then just brought his things the next day without consulting me, he's been going back in his home wearing gloves & a mask, sitting in the garden, drove her to the doctors. Just wondering if July would be reasonable.

Tell him to get to fuck right now. What a pisstake.

I'm a care worker, he's a gardener, so both out working x

If he's already been back to hers and drove her back to the doctor's, I'd send him back and make him isolate in his bedroom there. He sounds selfish. Are you going to still maintain your relationship when he goes home or are you going to leave him?

If he's doing those things then he is already putting his mum at a similar level of risk to what he would be by living there.

Sorry, rogue apostrophe in doctors there. Damn autocorrect!

Today is reasonable. He didn’t have a proper discussion with you about moving in and has taken the piss out of you since. No need for a discussion about him moving out now, tell him to pack his bags and be gone.

Sounds like this will have a useful experience as you know what he’s really like.

He's definitely taking the piss, send him back to his mother

Yes I would kick him out to be honest. Unless there is a massive and real change in his attitude and contribution to the household.

What do you want OP? Do you want him to grow up and be a decent partner, or piss off entirely?

@Susan1961

He said would I mind, then just brought his things the next day without consulting me, he's been going back in his home wearing gloves & a mask, sitting in the garden, drove her to the doctors. Just wondering if July would be reasonable.

You have yourself a covid cocklodger. He's totally taking the piss. He takes his mum to the GP, closely confined with her in a car anyway.

Send him packing and don't allow people to move into your home just because they want to.

Cocklodger. Get rid.

Sorry, he said 'would you mind?' And you said 'sure let's do it!' Then he moved his stuff in? Or you said 'hmmm let's think about it/no' and he moved his stuff in? What was his response when he asked you?

He's taking the piss. Tomorrow is reasonable. Get rid.

What you have there is a cocklodger. There is no cure. Immediate removal is advised.

Cocklodger.. he's completely taking the PISS.. tell him to move out today...

Sorted prompt needed cheers guys!