Aibu for only allowing supervised contact

[Herewegoagain19891]

Ex was abusive towards our now 19 month old dd, emotionally abusive and physically neglectful. Would scare her, splash water in her face while she was crying in the bath, calling her a Paki, a little shit, threatening to make her an orphan by pushing me down the stairs.

So now I have said until you fix your issues all contact is to be supervised by either one of my family members with one of his family members present too or in a contact centre (we are currently in court). The reason for I won't allow it to be one of his family members is because they've witness the abuse and made a joke out of it.

So here we are now in court, he has refused to go through my family members and obviously contact centres are closed so he hasn't seen dd in 4 months, not that dd is bothered as they didn't have a bond.

So AIBU for suggesting supervised contact?

You're definitely not being unreasonable to request he only has supervised contact in those circumstances.

I would be suggesting no contact at all if I were you - but if the court forces you to then fight for supervised in a contact centre for as long as possible.

I'd fight for no direct contact at all

I'd be pushing for no contact if I was you. What an abhorrent piece of work he sounds.

Well I wanted no contact, but Im self representating (won't be for much longer) and his barrister bullied me into agreeing to supervised at the first hearing. Covid delayed it all but now contact is to start this Saturday under the supervision of an independent Social worker for 3 sessions after which they want to review again to move forwards but that's another stressful story.

Reason I wonder if I'm being unreasonable is because I won't allow it to be just him and his family. But like I said they've minimised the abuse and I've seen the way they treat women in his family, it's no wonder exp is the man he is.